This is quickly becoming one of the greatest Mary Worth stories of all time. I expected more walking. I did NOT expect buying footwear. It's plot twists like this that make me jump out of my chair and exclaim, "You've got to be kidding!"
26 comments:
Anonymous
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This plot....I'm having the "End of Apartment 3-G" delirium tremens all over again!
Iris was most attracted to Zak's pristine shoes. Grubby Wilbur was out of his footwear league.
I have a sneaking suspicion that Wilbur's footwear search will not be logging onto Zappos. This is going to take the rest of the week, if not the rest of the month.
I almost choked on my English muffin when I read your secret message, Wanders.
For someone who sits on his behind all day eating sandwiches, moping and burning down his bathroom while showering (based on all the smoke that was coming out), Wilbur's sneakers should be pristine. He must be rooting for truffles in his spare time.
The next scenario is Wilbur will be going sneaker shopping and another lady who is way out of his league will help him. Be prepared to lose another 30 large, Wilbur.
Meanwhile, in beautiful Italy, Dawn goes to the opera and falls in love with opera singer Puciano Lavarotti.
Wilbur will wander into Santa Royale’s most exclusive shoe emporium, where the hip young salespeople will immediately refer him to the Orthotics Specialist. She will be an attractive lady, about Iris’ age. He will be immediately smitten. She will be immediately repelled by his disgusting feet. (The shower didn’t help the foot fungus he caught in Colombia). However, both her professional ethics and her desire to sell an extremely expensive pair of walking shoes will cause her to respond graciously. He will completely mistake this attitude, and ask her out. She will politely decline, since she’s already in a relationship with the young, hip shoe salesman. She will refer him to a local chiropodist, who is also an attractive lady about Iris’ age...
Bolding "New Footwear" illustrates the suspense deficit that this (not really a) storyline suffers from. The upside is it enabled Nance to put together a haiku where "New footwear" is the antidote to being "Stir crazy!", which we all know is true.
Many people believe it's all about the shoes, but socks are a critical element of foot comfort. I hope Ms Moy is diligently researching technical performance yarn blends and the value of thickness zones for optimal fit and cushioning. Will we be treated to an excursion to Shoe Store? Maybe Zak opened one and calls it Zak's Kicks.
I have to say ... I am FASCINATED!!! ... Maybe Wilbur will meet the new "love of his life" at the food court after he goes shoe shopping. He will befriend a mopey shopper sobbing into her hamburger. He will start the conversational interaction with, "Are you going to eat all your French fries?" hoping to garner one for himself. SCORE!
@Louise F--I have to say, you've really identified the one truism that exists in this whole pile of banal zzzz. More than a few times I've bought new shoes in a flailing attempt to shake me out of a bout of ennui or cabin fever. A couple of times, it has even worked.
But never, NEVER have any of my shoes looked anything like Wilbur's, and I mean both in Condition and in "Style."
26 comments:
This plot....I'm having the "End of Apartment 3-G" delirium tremens all over again!
No one will be seated during the thrilling shoe-shopping scene!
Iris was most attracted to Zak's pristine shoes. Grubby Wilbur was out of his footwear league.
I have a sneaking suspicion that Wilbur's footwear search will not be logging onto Zappos. This is going to take the rest of the week, if not the rest of the month.
Whoa! I had the same reaction, Wanders! This explosive development came out of nowhere, and it has rocked my world!
Where will he shop? Who will he meet? Will his credit card be rejected?
All these questions and more are sure to be answered in the coming . . . uh, months.
Meanwhile in Beautiful Italy, Harlan joyously belts out a robust "Funiculi, Funiculà" in the shower.
-- Scottie McW.
I almost choked on my English muffin when I read your secret message, Wanders.
For someone who sits on his behind all day eating sandwiches, moping and burning down his bathroom while showering (based on all the smoke that was coming out), Wilbur's sneakers should be pristine. He must be rooting for truffles in his spare time.
The next scenario is Wilbur will be going sneaker shopping and another lady who is way out of his league will help him. Be prepared to lose another 30 large, Wilbur.
Meanwhile, in beautiful Italy, Dawn goes to the opera and falls in love with opera singer Puciano Lavarotti.
Wilbur will wander into Santa Royale’s most exclusive shoe emporium, where the hip young salespeople will immediately refer him to the Orthotics Specialist. She will be an attractive lady, about Iris’ age. He will be immediately smitten. She will be immediately repelled by his disgusting feet. (The shower didn’t help the foot fungus he caught in Colombia). However, both her professional ethics and her desire to sell an extremely expensive pair of walking shoes will cause her to respond graciously. He will completely mistake this attitude, and ask her out. She will politely decline, since she’s already in a relationship with the young, hip shoe salesman. She will refer him to a local chiropodist, who is also an attractive lady about Iris’ age...
The Donner Party called. They want their shoes back.
I want to see Wilbur rollerblading around the park . . . or near the cliff at lookout point.
Today's Boldface Haiku is titled
"In Which I Realize That My Life Is A Michael Bay Movie Compared To This Drek".
Right. Stir crazy!
Good luck!
Hmm. New footwear...
@Gina and @Regina--Stellar commenting today!
This may take awhile. It's not easy to find adult sized shoes with velcro straps these days.
Looks like The Mummy loaned Wilbur his shoes...
Bolding "New Footwear" illustrates the suspense deficit that this (not really a) storyline suffers from. The upside is it enabled Nance to put together a haiku where "New footwear" is the antidote to being "Stir crazy!", which we all know is true.
Many people believe it's all about the shoes, but socks are a critical element of foot comfort. I hope Ms Moy is diligently researching technical performance yarn blends and the value of thickness zones for optimal fit and cushioning.
Will we be treated to an excursion to Shoe Store? Maybe Zak opened one and calls it Zak's Kicks.
Does anyone know where KM lives? We need to stage an intervention.
After Wilbur buys new shoes he'll buy a pair of walking shorts and a t-shirt with a Beerrok or Inkie label.
Panel of the year?
I have to say ... I am FASCINATED!!! ... Maybe Wilbur will meet the new "love of his life" at the food court after he goes shoe shopping. He will befriend a mopey shopper sobbing into her hamburger. He will start the conversational interaction with, "Are you going to eat all your French fries?" hoping to garner one for himself. SCORE!
Those look more like mummy wrappings than shoes. Why is he wearing them in the house?
mall....he'll run into that shopping addict, I forgot her name...
Aww, thank you, @Nance! That is an honor!
@Louise F--I have to say, you've really identified the one truism that exists in this whole pile of banal zzzz. More than a few times I've bought new shoes in a flailing attempt to shake me out of a bout of ennui or cabin fever. A couple of times, it has even worked.
But never, NEVER have any of my shoes looked anything like Wilbur's, and I mean both in Condition and in "Style."
I have a pair like that to knock around in. My bride loathes them.
-- S. McW.
I think the answer to Wilbur's mopes could lie in a tattoo? Perhaps one of the beach in Bogota.
I'm calling it. Wilbore will meet his new honey at the shoe store.
@nance I've bought books for that purpose. I'll admit that.
I'm still bugged by the way Wilbur is holding his phone. Who does that? How does that even work?
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