Speaking of transformation, it looks like one of the giant land clams that have disguised themselves as rocks is about to attack Mary. He's been lying in wait for years, and now's his chance.
"All It Takes To Transform A Beast Into The Best Is To Take Away The A-".
Win-win! Greta new home... Canine friend, new outlook! Ever grumpy? All transformation. Love change. Good. Man beast alone! Social interact! Lucky...best.
Okay, now Moy is just phoning it in. The only question I had, was is Toby capable of transformation? Into someone with empathy and maybe a bit more tact?
Over the next few weeks, all of Charterstone is consumed by a new fad: owning well-dressed pets.
Here come Ian and Toby with their West Highland Terrier, Wee Ian MacTavish Cameron, II. Wee Ian is smartly attired in a Clan Cameron tartan tam o’shanter, a tiny Clan MacTavish kilt, a very small sporran, and an even smaller dirk. Toby and Ian are beaming with pride, but poor Wee Ian is ashamed to make eye contact with the other dogs they encounter. “I’ll gie ye fur thes, Great Ian, and I’ll bite yer lady wife, tay.”, he thinks. He growls when he sees the next dog.
Wilbur’s dog, an astoundingly plump English bulldog, is called Mustard. Mustard is wearing a large bib over his avocado green polo shirt. His stubby little legs keep getting caught in the flimsy polyester knit fabric. “I say, Wilbur, old chap, it really isn’t the thing to force a chap to wear cheap and unflattering clothes. Get me a derby hat and a lounge suit and then maybe I’ll quit taking a whiz behind your Lazy Boy, “ he thinks.
Mary Worth’s canine companion is a fluffy white poodle named Mrs. Meddle. She’s wearing a lavender jogging suit which makes her butt look big, and she knows it. “You’ll find this schmatta ripped to shreds on the kitchen floor tomorrow morning, you cruel old biddy. And there’ll be a little surprise under it for you,” she muses. “And I’ll never eat another bite of salmon without immediately regurgitating it.”
Mr. Allora’s new dog is -wait for it- a miniature chihuahua called Perro Allora y Alora. He’s wearing a miniature sombrero, but is otherwise nude. He rides in Mr. Allora’s jacket pocket and yaps viciously when they meet other dogs, or people, or blowing leaves. “You like that high-pitched bark of mine, Allora? Try to put a serape on me, Senor, and I’ll kick the volume up by a hundred decibels! Ha ha, did you see the way that cowardly bulldog reacted when l let him hear the full Perro?”
8 comments:
Mary, are YOU capable of transformation?
Tomorrow, Mary casually backs her car over a cat and ruins her new wheels.
Speaking of transformation, it looks like one of the giant land clams that have disguised themselves as rocks is about to attack Mary. He's been lying in wait for years, and now's his chance.
-- Scottie McW.
What do we want? A Pool Party!
When do we want it? Tomorrow Would Be Good!
Today's Boldface Haiku is titled
"All It Takes To Transform A Beast Into The Best Is To Take Away The A-".
Win-win! Greta new home...
Canine friend, new outlook!
Ever grumpy?
All transformation.
Love change. Good.
Man beast alone!
Social interact!
Lucky...best.
Okay, now Moy is just phoning it in. The only question I had, was is Toby capable of transformation? Into someone with empathy and maybe a bit more tact?
Over the next few weeks, all of Charterstone is consumed by a new fad: owning well-dressed pets.
Here come Ian and Toby with their West Highland Terrier, Wee Ian MacTavish Cameron, II. Wee Ian is smartly attired in a Clan Cameron tartan tam o’shanter, a tiny Clan MacTavish kilt, a very small sporran, and an even smaller dirk. Toby and Ian are beaming with pride, but poor Wee Ian is ashamed to make eye contact with the other dogs they encounter. “I’ll gie ye fur thes, Great Ian, and I’ll bite yer lady wife, tay.”, he thinks. He growls when he sees the next dog.
Wilbur’s dog, an astoundingly plump English bulldog, is called Mustard. Mustard is wearing a large bib over his avocado green polo shirt. His stubby little legs keep getting caught in the flimsy polyester knit fabric. “I say, Wilbur, old chap, it really isn’t the thing to force a chap to wear cheap and unflattering clothes. Get me a derby hat and a lounge suit and then maybe I’ll quit taking a whiz behind your Lazy Boy, “ he thinks.
Mary Worth’s canine companion is a fluffy white poodle named Mrs. Meddle. She’s wearing a lavender jogging suit which makes her butt look big, and she knows it. “You’ll find this schmatta ripped to shreds on the kitchen floor tomorrow morning, you cruel old biddy. And there’ll be a little surprise under it for you,” she muses. “And I’ll never eat another bite of salmon without immediately regurgitating it.”
Mr. Allora’s new dog is -wait for it- a miniature chihuahua called Perro Allora y Alora. He’s wearing a miniature sombrero, but is otherwise nude. He rides in Mr. Allora’s jacket pocket and yaps viciously when they meet other dogs, or people, or blowing leaves. “You like that high-pitched bark of mine, Allora? Try to put a serape on me, Senor, and I’ll kick the volume up by a hundred decibels! Ha ha, did you see the way that cowardly bulldog reacted when l let him hear the full Perro?”
@meg, that’s priceless!
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