Wednesday, November 28, 2018

Mary Worth 3017

Please tell me that's the Charterstone Reader's edition of Outlander - with the sex scenes tastefully removed.

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

I had to look up what Outlander was. The only thing that came to my mind was the 1981 Sean Connery sci-fi flick about drug smuggling on a space station.

Anonymous said...


Mary curls up with a new book, "How To Serve Cats."

-- Scottie McW.

Nance said...

Today's Boldface Haiku is titled

"Because When You Shut Out The Bad, You Shut Out The Good, Too: Mary Follows Her Own Advice For Once".

Nice...
[Meow!]
This!

Anonymous said...

Can Mary also get used to the cat vomit stains that are impossible to remove? Doubtful.

fauxprof said...

Actually, Mary has pasted the Outlander cover over her well-worn copy of Fifty Shades of Grey. And I think that Libby is about to introduce Mary to another aspect of cat affection, i.e., kneading behavior, wherein all the front claws are embedded in the owners knee. It adds to the comfort of all concerned to have a nice, thick fleece throw between cat and human.

(I know I’m harping on this, but that is one ugly cat!)

meg said...

That book is so small—-HOW SMALL IS IT, MEG?—-it’s so small it contains nothing BUT the sex scenes! Ba da bing!

Thanks, Wanders, for reading this filthy tome so we don’t have to.

meg said...

Scottie McW. You win.

KitKat said...

Libby digs her claws into Mary's thighs as she prepares to leap off Mary's lap.

I wonder if KM specified the book title or if she left it up to JB.

@Scottie McW., your comment is both accurate and a shout-out to one of my favorite episodes of " The Twilight Zone" - huzzah!

Anonymous said...


Thanks meg and KitKat, but I botched the title. It should say, "To Serve Cats."

-- S. McW.

Anonymous said...

fauxprof, we call that kneading paw thing "makin' biscuits."

LouiseF said...

Curious to hear Mary noting the "peace" in her apartment all of a sudden, given the previous days' behavior of Libby...Perhaps Mary is experiencing peace, because she stapled some velcro onto Libby's stomach and stuck the other side on her own lap... Let's see that cat TRY to jump down and get up on the kitchen counter,computer keyboard, or Mary's bed NOW!

TimP said...

What is with putting the 'meow' in bold face and a trapezoidal narration box? Is the narrator saying meow? No wonder everyone has been so suggestive.

Anyways, cats usually purr when they're content and meow when they're not so clearly Mary is doing it wrong.

Gina said...

@TimP I always thought the MW narration box was a little catty. *rimshot*

mr_darcy said...

Until now, Mary couldn't give exposition to the readers by talking to herself, because that would be crazy. Now that she has a cat, talking to the cat is a completely normal cat-lady thing to do. Does this mean less Toby from now on? We can only hope.

Sandi Ego said...

I would expect Toby to read Outlander, not Mary. And Wanders, that secret message is hilarious!