Friday, April 5, 2019

Mary Worth 3099

Toby Cameron: Cyber Sleuth.

25 comments:

Regina Wolfe-Parks said...

Wow, Toby's a little snippy with her "What's her deal?" comment. She must realize that Estelle is a bigger bubblehead than she is.

Since when did Toby become a super sleuth? She better call in Terry Bryson for this. Leave the sleuthing to the pros, Toby. You're way out of your league.

KitKat said...

Our newspaper, the Plain Dealer, ran two-month-old strips on the first Comics page today (not a late April Fool, just the absence of editors - the PD is laying off reporters and editors at a disgusting pace). So, today’s printed MW is Estelle first contacting Arthur Z. on SilverDaters. That sure threw me for a loop. I thought maybe she was looking for a tom cat for Libby.

On to the real today’s strip: Toby? Research? Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha...

Doug said...

I wonder if Terry Bryson is still in the internet security business. A few years ago, she reconnected with her old flame Adam Miller and they subdued a mugger on the pier and were last seen splashing around in the Charterstone pool.

Maybe Toby really has been learning the ins and outs of online scammery. She could always call on Terry and Adam for backup when it comes time to crack Arther Z. over the head with a cane.

Nance said...

Today's Boldface Haiku is titled

"When You Need To Know More Than Towel-Folding And Relationship Advice, Ask Toby".

Not online dating...worried.
Deal?
Money taking advantage!
Internet dating, scammed.
Research!

Anonymous said...

The following day Toby calls Mary:

Toby: Hi Mary. Well, I did some research on Estelle's boyfriend, Arther. I found out that he's a very attractive, age-appropriate gentleman. He's nearing retirement after working for a very lucrative company overseas. He's recently bought a luxury condo right here in Santa Royale! He loves traveling, multicultural food, and cats. I wouldn't worry if I were you. He sounds perfect for Estelle!

Regina Wolfe-Parks said...

Once again Nance, you hit a home run with you BFH title. I am so happy that I now have a private office so I can laugh out loud without others thinking I've lost it.

Anyway, I was just browsing through FB and Estelle might want to check her panty because Oskri Tahini butter has been recalled due to that it may be carrying listeria. I wouldn't want her to get sick while she's eating her falafels. She may not be able to pay for hospital expenses now that she lost that ten grand to Arther/Arthur.

Anonymous said...

@Regina W-P: Her panty? Yikes!

Chester the Dog said...

Sheesh, gossip much, Mary?

MDMaryTed said...

Now wait a minute--wasn't Mary with Estelle when she came up with her on-line profile? And now she is saying that she isn't familiar with on-line dating? In fact, the Feb 19th strip (has this story line dragged on since February?) has Mary saying, and I quote, " I've heard online dating can result in some great love stories!". But yet she is telling Toby she isn't familiar with on-line dating? Really KM, do you even read your own comic strip?

Regina Wolfe-Parks said...

Oops! I meant *pantry*. Didn't mean to be not family friendly, just typing too fast!

Anonymous said...


"Let me research him, because God knows, I don't have a single other thing to do in my hideously vacant life."

@Kit Kat, I noticed that the P.D. ran an old MW, but I didn't realize they ran an entire page of last month's strips. Wow.

-- Scottie McW.


KitKat said...

@Scottie McW., a rerun of “Jumpstart” today tipped me off before I saw Estelle telling Libby “Here goes NOTHING” as she fires up SilverDaters.

@Nance, we are unworthy of your brilliance!

Yahoonski said...

Regina: I loves me a hilarious typo. For a second there, I was flashing back to "Last Tango in Paris." But Arther is no Brando.

Nance said...

@Regina Wolfe-Parks and @KitKat--Thanks so much. I get my Mary Worth and news from the Cleveland Plain Dealer also, and noticed right away that they had erred egregiously with the first page of comics.

Did you also read the recent Letter to the Editor that recommended (again) yanking MW as a comic strip that needs to go? (Along with Spiderman, Judge Parker, and the reruns of Doonesbury, all of which I heartily agree with, but save Mary Worth!)

Anonymous said...


@Nance,

I emailed the publisher of the P.D. a couple weeks ago and advised him not to ever pull MW because there's a small but plucky band of MW loyalists who would not be happy. He thanked me for the advice and noted that he'd never heard anyone say anything good about this strip before. I should have told him that the reason we love it is that it's so bad it's good -- except when it's just bad.

-- S. McW.

Tim said...

I'd be ironically disappointed if I couldn't read MW any more

KitKat said...

@Nance, there’s a letter to the editor recommending axing MW in today’s PD too! I better get cracking and fire off my own missive.

@Scottie McW,, you contacted George R. directly? (I’m heartsick over the layoffs announced this week. I haven’t read anything about management sharing the burden by taking salary reductions- grrrr.)

LouiseF said...

Wondering just how Toby plans to "research" Arthur Z. LinkedIn? White Pages? More like Google for her...Adding a note of sad solidarity to the observations of other PD readers. Good article in this week's SCENE about the layoffs.

Anonymous said...


@KitKat

I've emailed George R. on many occasions and he almost always answers. Sometimes we have a little give-and-take. He's a nice guy.

Yes, another round of layoffs. Where does it end? They can't keep doing this. I do hope there's a viable long-term plan to stop the bleeding.

-- S. McW.

MissScarlet said...

Sorry about the news of the PD. However, Comics Kingdom will provide you with Mary Worth, Rex Morgan, Judge Parker and even Apartment 3G. I hadn't read any of the old legacy strips in years until I discovered The Comic Curmudgeon and Josh making delicious fun of them. In fact, reading the Comic Curmudgeon is how I found Wanders' wonderful blog.

Anonymous said...

Yes; as MissScarlet said... you people do realize, don't you, that MW is available online? Well, until the strip is axed entirely. But I haven't subscribed to an actual "newspaper" for years. I didn't realize that so many people still did!

Bill the Butcher said...

“OMG,” Toby thinks to herself, “this Arther Zerro is actually George Clooney! He must be looking for someone to love and only those who love him enough to send him money pass the test! No wonder Estelle sent him ten big ones! This is my chance to dump Chinbeard Ian and get the life I’ve always wanted! I’ll fob off this old bag Mary with some excuse or other and send him fifty thousand right now!”

fauxprof said...

George Clooney? Oh, c’mon. More like “random guy from any TV commercial”. June is quite capable of drawing someone to look reasonably like a celebrity. Hoosier the Cruiser looked a lot like Benjamin Bratt. As for Arthu(er) Zerro, I took him for Ted Miller, at first. And is Zerro a misspelling of “Zero”?

Doug said...

There is something special about reading Mary Worth in the paper.

When I was a kid I thought those serial strips were useless. I thought all comics were supposed to have a joke and Mary Worth was just two panels of random people talking about other people, or so it seemed to me. Why was it even there?

Since the time I’ve come to appreciate Mary Worth and follow her daily (yes, due to snarky treatment like Comics Curmudgeon and our beloved Wanders) I haven’t had a paper printing Mary Worth in my life. I haven’t even subscribed to one in a decade.

When I go visit my Dad, I always look at his local paper because it still prints Mary Worth. He was going through some rough times and I stayed with him on a few occasions and looked forward to being able to see Mary Worth in the morning paper. I was shocked to find out that my Dad was reading Mary Worth. He said he reads all the comics every day. We had one of the longest conversations we’d had in ages talking about Wilbur being taken by the Argentinian dance instructor. Before he tossed his papers in the recycling, I clipped out the three strips when Wilbur discovered the dancer in the arms of another man.

I used to visit an old friend who’s local paper carried Mary Worth on Sundays. If I stayed over Saturday night, I would pick up a paper to see Mary Worth. I still remember sitting on his front porch opening up the comics and seeing that Mary Worth strip where Mary and Jeff attended a concert where a singing duo where doing that song Falling Slowly from the movie Once. It was one of shocking inclusions of current popular culture into the world of Mary Worth. (Except the bland beige singers looked nothing like the duo from the film). I wish I had clipped that one out.

We can still have our moments of delight reading online. It’s pretty much how I read most of the comics I follow regularly. However I do envy those that still get to see Mary in print in the morning and hope it doesn’t end for them

Barbara L. Hanson said...

Pantry?