Wednesday, February 12, 2020

Mary Worth 3286


Every morning I wake up and ask myself, “How is Karen Moy going to form a coherent sentence that fits into a tiny word balloon?” Some days are better than others. 


25 comments:

fauxprof said...

I’m worried about Dawn’s hand. It looks gnarled and swollen. Early-onset arthritis, perhaps? When she returns Iris’ turtleneck, she should ask for Dr, Mom’s number.

Yahoonski said...

Skinny milk carton, skinny mug, skinny soft drink can, fat Wilbur. Again, let us praise the bright red apple for bringing some color to the gray galley of the battleship Weston. And speaking of color, let us be thankful Wilbur has not tried to match his nail color with his outfit as Dawn has done.

KitKat said...

Wilbur asks Dawn how she and Hugo are going to form their own separate lives, and Dawn replies, “We’re doing our best to stay connected!” !!?? Is that too-tight turtleneck impairing her hearing, or is this Dawn’s usual response, i.e., “We love each other, that’s enough!” (I suppose I could ask that the Condo Board add “Love Will Keep Us Together” to the Charterstone Jukebox, but probably no one except Dawn wants to hear the Captain and Tennile.)

Chester the Dog said...

What on earth are they talking about? This is like decoding a secret message,

LouiseF said...

Kitkat! Thanks for a big guffaw! I was also struck by how Dawn's answer to Wilbur's question didn't seem to track... Looks like she (or maybe KM since Dawn is, after all, just a comic strip character, forced to say whatever her puppetmaster puts in her mouth) has been peeking in Mary's Big Book o'Cliches. Wilbur, on the other hand has become the voice of reason now that he's sobered up. Or maybe he just took that Parenting Your Teenager class he'd been meaning to schedule since 1977...

meg said...

fauprof: Dawn’s hand seems to be left over from the Giella era.

Anonymous said...


"You're both young and living in two different countries."

Boy, that Wilbur is sharp. Nothing gets past him.

Also, I like the way he specifies that they're two different countries, as opposed to, I guess, three different countries. Or two identical countries. Who knows?

-- Scottie McW.

Regina Wolfe-Parks said...

The whole conversation is like they took Wilbur saying this dreck from one comic and spliced it together with Dawn from another comic, which may be why what they're saying to each other makes no sense. (Sort of like Garfield without Garfield.) Whatever the case, I'm so tired of Dawn and "we are so in love" conversation. She sounds like a lovesick teenager. She's got to be forty by now. Grow up. Sheesh.

I want Frenchy to come back to America and Wilbur drinks some "liquid courage" before meeting him. Hugo will say "The fathers in Paris are much better than here in America.

TimP said...

Wilbur's 'Ask Wendy' editor at the Santa Royale PennySaver should really be earning hazard pay.

Regina Wolfe-Parks said...

THURSDAY: It's so boring no one's commented. Okay, I'll go first. I love how Wilbur says he's been around the block". He sure has, around the block to Jerry's sandwich shop, around the block to the big hamburger place, around the block to anyplace that says "Food". Love is not enough, but food is.

Wilbur's going to Estelle's. Doesn't Estelle ever go to Wilboor's? He's such a great catch-eat in and do "corny piano singalongs." I'm team Dawn on this one.

That Wilbur's quite a catch, who wouldn't want to be with him? OMG, he's so loathsome.

When I read all this, I thought of a corny quote by Oscar Hammerstein that was very big when I was in HS in the '70s (yea, I'm THAT OLD!) It was "The love in your heart wasn't put there to stay/love isn't love 'til you give it away." I got your quote for Sunday KM! I just made your job a little more easier and trite than it already is.

LouiseF said...

Pretty funny when even Dawn joins the snark-at-Wilbur bandwagon.

KitKat said...

Thursday
We’re all bored, including June; she pulled out that stock crazy-angle exterior drawing for panel 1. In panel 2, I note that Dawn’s been trimming her hair with nail scissors again. And what are the black smudges on her cheeks? She looks positively scary today.

When was the last time you heard a college student describe something as “corny”? Even one who’s pushing 40, like Dawn?

Regina Wolfe-Parks said...

FRIDAY: Passive aggressive much, Dawn? These two are the father/daughter George and Martha of "Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?" fame, only more repulsive.

I'm afraid this boring plot is slowly scaring everyone away, including Wanders and Nance. KM is doing her best to make sure only two people are reading Mary Worth: her and JB.

Chester the Dog said...

Read what, Dawn, the TV Guide?

fauxprof said...

If Charterstone collapsed into a giant sinkhole and the only survivors were Mr. Allora, Libby, and the little dachshund, the world would be a better place. Better still if Zak, Iris and Tommy were there too.

Anonymous said...


While Zak is taking Iris out for a romantic dinner at a nice restaurant for Valentine's Day, Wilbur is treating Estelle to take-out food in plastic containers at her place. This in itself is grounds for "taking a break" -- a permanent one. He'll probably want to watch boxing during "dinner."

-- Scottie McW.

Anonymous said...


On second thought, plastic would be too fancy for Wilbur. He'll go with the styrofoam.

-- S. McW.

meg said...

Dawn has reading to do?.

She begins with the online Paris Match, the celebrity lifestyle features section. Her eyes are immediately drawn to a picture of a handsome young Frenchman wearing a Givenchy tuxedo, smiling at the beautiful blonde beside him.

The caption: ‘Hugo le Pew, scion of the publishing house Hachette, smiles as he is introduced as the current fiancé of socialite Paris Hilton.
The engagement is expected to last for approximately one year and will conclude with the couple deciding to break up but remain friends.
Miss Hilton, 39. has previously been engaged to Chris Zylka, Paris Latsis, Stavros Niarchos III, Fred Durst, Rick Salomon, Benji Madden, Nick Carter, Simon Rex (aka Dirt Nasty), Joe Francis, Jamie Kennedy, Adrian Grenier...*. Monsieur le Pew, 22, was previously doing long distance with American pre grad student Dawn whose last name young le Pew professes not to recall.”

*. Additional names are continued on page trente sept.

Yahoonski said...

Mon Dieu! Dawn has developed the thighs and hips of a pre-Columbian fertility goddess statuette. She needs to get on Iris's gluten-free diet pronto.

KitKat said...

@meg at 10:39 a.m., that was INSPIRED! I bow to your snarky brilliance!

Oh no, we’re facing a week of Estelle and Wilbur warbling/croaking at the piano, with Libby perched on top with a rectangular “meow” thought box.

No Valentine’s Day early-bird dinner at the Bum Boat with Mary and Jeff?

meg said...

KitKat:

Thanks. :)

Today’s early bird at the Bum Boat is a seagull, smothered in water flavored broth. (It’s Jeff’s favorite, but Mary orders-wait for it- the salmon!)

KitKat said...

@meg, the least KM could do would be the hiring of John Dill as pastry chef at the Bum Boat. Mary could pit the screws on him to buy her muffins.

mr_darcy said...

Dawn read? She's boasting that she has two good eyes. What kind of person has to feel superior to a cat? Anyone who's seen a Stephen King movie knows this won't end well for Dawn.

Regina Wolfe-Parks said...

@Meg, I almost choked on my popcorn reading your inspired posts, especially the one about Dr. Jeff's dinner choice. Now THAT would be adventurous eating!

I wonder if the neighbors get tired of Estelle and Wilbore screeching out the Pina Colada song while Estelle bangs on the piano?I wonder where Mr. Big Spender is getting the takeout? I'm sure the Thai place has banned him permanently. Most likely it's Jerry's Sandwich shop, which hopefully they cleaned up that mess in the bathroom.

Anonymous said...

Hey, Regina W-P - At this point, I'm so bored with this story that I'd rather look at the mess in Jerry's Sandwich Shop bathroom.

HelenClark