Mary understands Estelle’s feelings. Now she will proceed to tell her why she’s wrong, and any marriage is better than none at all. (Except for Dr. Jeff, of course.)
I love how characters in the Worthiverse are so out of touch with their own history (Estelle) that they can't seem to put any thoughts together unless they are talking to Mary. Maybe there's truth serum in those muffins...
@Scottie, not only did Estelle have to carry her luggage herself, she had to pay the single-room rate. Was she an heiress? Did she have a lot of insurance on Jimmy? She always seems to have plenty of dough.
Job stress as a police officer caused Jimmy's heart attact? His two-pack a day cigarette habit, fast-food diet, and sedentary lifestyle may have played a part too, Estelle.
Mary just repeated back what Estelle had already said. But now she regrets how she treated Ed. Course, she didn’t behave very well, did she? Throwing the ring and all….endangering small dogs in the office. I’m guessing she will explain herself to Ed and he will join a yoga group.
Once again, KM takes the man's side and browbeats the woman until she admits she was in the wrong. (Even Pierre gets to comment while Libby is MIA!) I realize that Estelle is an airhead who seems to have zero self insight, but this is the latest episode of Meddling Mother Mary setting a bumbling woman straight. The only woman in this strip who's not routinely clueless is ... Mary [sigh].
Not the first time I’ve seen a cat on a leash (even in real life) but definitely the only time I’ve seen a cat and a dog walking in tandem on leashes. I don’t think that ever happens. Meanwhile, @KitKat is so right, Estelle can’t even remember why she was upset with Ed now. For the umpteenth time, what does Mary put in those muffins?
It gets worse, Estelle. Ed is now canoodling with formerly estranged cousin Pam, who has convinced him to take a month-long vacation so they can visit Fiji, Bali, and the Maldives. -- Scottie
There has to be some obstacle (probably temporary, alas) preventing Estelle and Ed getting back together: it’s in the soap opera writer’s rulebook. Alternatively, Ed could get an attorney to draw up a contract that formalizes and declares to all the world that he is married to his job. The dogs will “woof,” the cats will “meow.” Honeymoon not required.
Hmph, I posted a comment early this morning, but it must be lost in the Interwebs. Take two: @MissScarlet, the secret ingredient in Mary's muffins is Milk of Amnesia.
Coming back for a second time today was worth it to see @Scottie's hilarious comment -- huzzah! Just think how Estelle will react when she returns to Animal Hospital, ready to apologize to Ed, and the Ed-Pam news is delivered by Dr. See.
So we’re back to Meow and Woof. Estelle looks pretty good in skinny jeans. I’ve never tried to walk a cat on a leash, but my father-in-law’s dog made friends with a cat while on a walk, who came home with them and never left. That’s all I’ve got.
"Could Jimmy's DEATH have influenced my actions with Ed?" Ya think it might've, Estelle? Maybe a teensy bit? (Let's take a break to bang our heads against the nearest wall or table as we contemplate the depth of Estelle's cluelessness.)
Coming next week, or maybe by Halloween: Estelle bursts into Animal Hospital, sobbing, and exclaims to Ed, "Oh Ed, I want you to continue your workaholic behavior, even if it kills you! Thanks to Mary and her muffins, I understand your behavior!"
Estelle, since you rank lower than Mrs. Fitz' pet hamster on the list of things Ed cares about -- in fact, you rank lower than every animal on Earth -- workaholism doesn't seem to be the primary issue here. Ed's inability to form normal human relationships is. And I don't think all the muffins in the world can fix that. -- Scottie
Estelle and Ed on the cusp of reuniting now that Estelle has had her head put on straight due to a dose of muffinia. Victory lap for Mary will ensue...
"Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the most clueless one of all?"
Libby and Pierre should play a trick on Mommy and switch up their usual responses. Pierre: "Meow!" Libby: "Woof!" That would inject some humor into this dreary drama.
Next: Mary bumps into Ed, invites him for muffins, Ed comes to see that it is he, not Estelle, that is completely wrong. Then, Estelle and Ed meet by accident in the park and both grovel for forgiveness and another chance. Mary, hiding behind a tree, witnesses it all while her spine begins to emit a pulsating glow. All this has happened before and will happen again.
Estelle must surely be due a smack on the head for her reference to the song "Alone Again, Naturally". Back to karaoke with Wilbur if she dredges up that one...
Oh, a dream sequence! Yeah! I hope Moy isn't leading us on. What will it be? Estelle marrying Ed and adopting 50 pets? Estelle making up with Ed and never seeing him again because he's always working? Estelle throwing chairs in the vet waiting room instead of her ring? Estelle throwing Ed?
I used to like Estelle, back in the blind date days, not any more, she is as twitty as most of the other characters in MW. Lets dump all this and start a new strip with the cat and dog, same dialogue every day, "Meow" and "Woof".
Hey, gang, does anybody else access MW through their Washington Post subscription? I haven’t been able to see any of the Washington Post comics for two days. I can get all the news stories, columns and puzzles, but no comics.
Boy, this Mommy and Daddy stuff is really grating. Is she knitting booties for them too? Reading them bedtime stories? Throwing them birthday parties? Sheesh. -- Scottie
KM herself comments on her dragged-out plot -- "ZZZZZ...."
Ed's not so dreamy. Being a workaholic, obsessed vet has made for an understaffed and overly crowded clinic. Arguments (Estelle and Ed) and gossiping (Estelle and Dr. See) happened in the waiting room in the presence of clients. What responsible pet owner would trust a place like that? Also, Ed made it clear to Estelle that he has no interest in planning their wedding. Estelle is a whiny, clueless, spoiled woman, but Ed is no prize either. (I will now step down from my soapbox.)
Gave up on WaPo, and signed up for Comics Kingdom, as Thunderheels suggested, so I’m caught up. KM and June have given us some wildly surreal dream sequences in the past, and this one is cued up for Sunday. I’m actually looking forward to this! (Gonna keep the WaPo subscription, BTW. The puzzles are pretty good!)
My guess is that Estelle's dream will turn out to be a nightmare where she's banging on the windows of the church during Ed's wedding to Pam. BTW - fauxprof - At the Seattle Times you can read the Mary Worth strip. No sign-up necessary.
Big day today! This may be one of the longest AAAUUUGGGHH!s in MW history, and rightly so. (Wilbur is such a character that his AUGH deserves a full 11 characters in itself).
Thanks, meg, for the Princess Di reference! Always a Wilbur-themed nightmare to get Worthiverse denizens' heads on straight. At this rate, maybe it's time to stop the advice from Mary and just give sleeping pills to the tortured folks who need to make decisions.
Estelle: "Oh, Ed. I'm so sorry! I realize now that I made a huge mistake when I called off our wedding. Can you please, please forgive me?"
Ed: "Huh? What are you talking about? Oh, yeah! That's right. I remember now! In all my excitement of being able to save the life of Mrs. Fitz's poodle, I'd forgotten all about that. Sure, no problem; no worries. Now... Chop Chop! Time for you to get busy. Those animal cages won't clean themselves!"
"Oh, Ed, I'm so sorry. I'm begging you -- please take me for granted and pay as little attention to me as you wish. It was silly of me to think that you should actually care about me. I know you love the animals way more than me, but I'll be happy with however many minutes you can squeeze me in for." -- Scottie
Good call on Roy Richardson, @Tiny fork! Is that June herself in front of him? I guess they're sitting on the groom's side since Mary and Jeff are on the other side. Does that mean June and Roy are friends of Wilbur?
I expected Estelle's dream to last longer than one day. A floating Ed head rates a "meh...."
The way Estelle is setting up her game plan makes me think it’s not going to go well, not at all. On the other hand, Estelle has had her “Met With Mary,” muffining, and once that happened, people usually come to her senses (Mary’s senses, to be clear) and things usually go well after that. So it’s a toss up: which way will the muffin land?
I hope that Ed and Estelle make up, go down to the courthouse and quietly get married. Then, per the laws of the Worthiverse, we will never see them or their annoying pets again. No more woof. No more meow. The downside is that we’ll probably get another Wilbur story. The last time we saw him (other than the nightmare kissy-kissy Sunday strip), he seemed to be gearing up to blight his daughter’s life.
Maybe @hmmm is right. Ed will have been so busy and distracted that he won’t have noticed Estelle’s absence. He will be in the middle of meatball surgery on two boxers and a Frenchy that got hit by a semi on highway 101. Estelle will scrub in and assist,
Enough with the Mommy and Daddy business [cringe] - egad.
So Estelle is going to beg Ed to take her back and promise that she won't make a peep when he devotes all his time to Animal Hospital while she stays home conversing with the kids ("Meow, woof, meow meow woof woof...") and drinking many bottles of wine.
And there it is! Full circle self denial. I wonder if Mary will officiate the ceremony. I’m sure she has her on-line credentials from the church of the Meddlesome Biddies.
“Damage control”? That’s an understatement. Estelle flung the ring, bounced it off Ed’s chest, and said “…the wedding is off!” Her potential marriage isn’t “damaged,” it’s sunk, lying on the bottom with a big hole in its side.
Ed has forgotten Estelle entirely, except for a vague feeling that he used to have a receptionist. “I wonder if that lady who used to answer the phone is volunteering somewhere else?” he muses, as he puts a ring he found on the floor in the lost and found box
Considering Ed has made NO effort to try to patch things up with Estelle, I think you're all correct, and he will be deeply embedded in furball retrieval surgery on an angora cat by the time Estelle arrives at his office. Either that or he's been so despondent Estelle will find him lying in a box of used cat litter, sobbing.
Well that wrapped up quickly. No retelling of life with Jimmy or muffins with Mary. It’s almost like Moy didn’t want to drag out the story. Oops! Too late.
The bridge (which none of us have seen before, despite it being the lovebirds' favorite spot) seems to be very steep. If we're lucky, that river of slush/wet concrete/gray lava/unknown substance will sweep Estelle and Ed into the creek, where they'll be attacked by that group of waterfowl. Just deserts for the workaholic veterenarian and his dim-witted sweetie receptionist.
Nice try, Scottie, trying to gin up some drama here... I'm wondering where those falling leaves are coming from, considering the strip is set in California. Perhaps the leaves are referencing how dry it is out west, and we can expect a nice wildfire to break out soon.
Estelle is not saying "Oh, darling...", she's saying "Boh, schmarleen mumble mumble."
"I decided to make some changes. First, I'm selling my practice to my nephew Steven. I figure you have enough money for both of us and our furry children."
Isn’t this where we came in? Ed lost Stephen as his second vet, and then Estelle began helping out as the receptionist with a sub-plan. I wouldn’t mind seeing Dr. See in the role. It would be fun to watch Estelle wrestle with her jealously. So, of course that won’t happen. I wonder if we will even get to see who Ed hires on. Moy will probably just skip over that. Sigh.
@MissScarlet -- Oh, I definitely see See, Senorita. Estelle will get some stalking tips from Wilbur, and she'll be spying on the two of them every chance she gets.
Then when she's sufficiently deranged again, maybe she'll burst into Ed's waiting room and throw her engagement ring at Sheila this time. -- Scottie
I notice that KM has resorted to calling Estelle "Stell", as we know Wilbur did, even naming one of his fish "Stell". I am glad to see that visitors to this blog have not caved in and started calling her "Stell". Definitely an anti-Wilbur vote that KM is ignoring at her peril.. Sorry, I'm preoccupied with thinking about votes these days...
I agree with @MissScarlet. Now that Estelle has admitted she was WRONG and begged Ed for forgiveness, which Ed graciously accepted, KM will hastily skip over the partner business so the lovebirds can continue to smooch and make googoo eyes at each other. Far be it from KM to have Ed hire a comely newly graduated veterinarian, Dr. Isolde Parnon.
How about this: Ed and Estelle's marriage certificate will list "Stell" as her given name, and unbeknownst to the happy couple their marriage is invalid.
Uh oh! I hope I'm not the last to comment here... Given the pace of this plot I can see why there's not a lot to say. C'mon, everybody! I'm sure we'll get to see Libby and Pierre dressed up for the wedding soon!!
Far be it from me to spoil the joy of this loving moment, but I keep hearing the sound of a cello slowly groaning in the background in anticipation of Estelle meeting Ed's new (and former?) partner. And I don't mean nephew Steven. -- Scottie
The cake does not rank as a culinary creation. It’s just three plain layers with some plastic roses stuck on it. The only thing impressive is that Mary had enough pull to get a special order of mauve Skittles flown in to make a border for the base.
I guess we can thank Ed Dill (was that his name?) for teaching Mary how to ice a cake. Estelle did a great job of scaling down the wedding. Mary provides the cake as her wedding gift; roses not tigers or bears; and everyone gets Milk of Amnesia (@KitKat) in every slice.
Thanks, meg! I can absolutely see Tim Walz officiating at this wedding, except the ticket probably doesn't need more California voters. Since tomorrow is Friday, I am expecting at least a panel or two of Ed and Estelle, possibly rehearsing for their upcoming appearance on "The Newlywed Game", where they will win a new washer and dryer to help with dealing with all that pet hair.
@meg and @LouiseF, you seem to have gotten access to a premium preview of "Dr. Harding Gets a Wife (in His Living Room)" yesterday afternoon. What's your secret? Yesterday was cake day in my paper, wherein Mary appears to be about to stab herself in the nose.
Boy, KM can put a plot into overdrive when she's motivated. We went from "My darling!" on Wednesday to "several weeks later" yesterday to Ed's living room today. Governor Walz isn't the only celebrity - the baseball legend Babe Ruth has materialized in place of Dr. Jeff Cory!
How does Mary know that Ed is a good match for Estelle? Has Mary ever met him?
What? We don't get to see Ed's new assistant? And no drama pertaining thereto? I feel cheated.
Unless . . .
Ed is concealing the identity of his new assistant from Estelle because he's afraid that she'll have some childish jealousy fit. But then Estelle will learn what Ed's up to and she'll have some childish jealousy fit.
And if this does indeed happen, I'm sure I will rue the day I hoped for it. -- Scottie
Yes, KitKat, I have a secret back channel to learn of future plot developments. Here’s tomorrow’s story: Mary is carefully transferring the wedding cake to the buffet table. Suddenly, a very inebriated Ian Cameron and buzzed out Toby appear through the front door, too late for the ceremony, but eager for the after party. In their rush to the bar cart, (here it comes, folks, the encounter you’ve been awaiting) they cross Mary’s path, sending her sprawling on the floor. But the cake is intact! Until Ian also falls, crushing the wedding cake against Mary’s purple suit. Ian is outraged. “Guid laird, hen! Can ye not gie out of yer ain way?” Pierre, Libby, Odin, Greta and Max move in and gobble down the cake. (Some later throw up on the carpet.)
Actually, when you go to “Read Today’s Mary Worth comic at the Official Mary Worth website!”, you will see the option to read a few days ahead.
Thanks for confessing, @meg, though you well deserve that secret back channel. I tried to take a peek at tomorrow's exciting episode (at KM's surprisingly hectic pace, it might be Estelle and Ed's seventh anniversary, with both of them getting the seven-year itch), but I was prompted to subscribe to Comics Kingdom. However, the flashback to Iris saving Zak at the Piccodee Falls cliff "with a strength born of love" was entertaining.
A nice Friday wrap up... Pretty sure Ed's ex is in attendance here as Woman with Tasteful White Streak in her Hair. And, of course, meg has hit it once again with her prediction of Tim Walz as the wedding officiant. Or did you invoke that Official Mary Worth website to get you on the right track?
I expect Mary will take her vctory lap on Sunday, with the attendees oohing and ahhing as she brings in the cake. In a lighthearted moment, Wilbur will eat the whole top layer himself, including the fake flowers. The festivities will conclude with Mary giving the guests little purple sacks (made by her, of course) of muffin crumbs, which the guests will toss at Estelle and Ed. The happy couple will drive off for their honeymoon, with Libby, Pierre, and Odin in the back seat. Mary will spend next week rehashing everything with a bored Toby.
Ashamed of his continuous unheroism, Wilbur's getting ready to spiral again. Drunken, unshaven, self-pitying slob Wilbur is the only Wilbur I enjoy, and I enjoy it very much. -- Scottie
In real life, Wilbur could be a hot commodity in the senior dating pool. He’s somewhat wealthy, he’s younger than Brad Pitt or George Clooney, he’s not totally hairless, he has an interesting career that involves travel…I vote for a newly revamped Wilbur to hit the dating scene. He’ll take walks with Mary, he’ll join Zak at the gym, he’ll eat a better diet, he’ll have a Vin Diesel style hairstyle (bye bye, combover), and he’ll have a new wardrobe from Santa Royale’s chicest men’s store, “Tall & Fat or Short and Stout”. Then he hits the senior social circuit- SR film society, Temple SR Mah Jongg, Parents Without Partners, Boors and Babes…..Eventually he’ll show up at a pool party with a date. She’ll be totally unsuitable and Mary and Toby will take over from there. Then Wilbur will be Alone Again, Naturally, and the cycle of life will begin again. Next story: Dawn’s Unsuitable new boyfriend.
"Close friends," Ed? Have you ever met Dr. Jeff? He's the guy by the window, trying to stave off an asthma attack due to all the dander and cat and dog hair in your house.
When is Mary's wedding cake going to be served? Time to break out the tiny plates, tiny forks (here's lookin' at you, @Tiny fork!), and doll-size wine glasses.
@KitKat yes, I was hoping for some actual tiny forks but none yet and no longer hopeful as they’ve moved on to the singing/yowling segment.
Wilbur is standing near Dr. See. New relationship possibility? Well, he couldn’t handle four-legged pets, but does still have Willa if he hasn’t cared her to death by now. He could bring Willa (or similar) in for an appointment with Dr. See and then “deftly” invite her for a cruise. Preposterous, yes, but with Wilbur the impossible becomes preposterously possible on a regular basis.
Seeing how much the guests and the animals are enjoying watching Ed and Estelle butcher both lyrics and music, Wilbur rushes back to his apartment and grabs his bagpipes. "Oh, they're going to LOVE this!" he thinks to himself as he rushes back. -- Scottie
fauxprof - I'm with you. I'm feeling pretty much the same way as Charlton Heston did when he saw the Statue of Liberty in the movie, Planet of the Apes.
The black hole that is Wilbur seems to be drawing the next plot line his way yet again. Perhaps he’ll return home, find Willa floating and declare, “I’m done with fish!” Then starts a new life as an orchid thief. He won’t find any in Santa Royale (I mean wild ones) but that doesn’t matter as he lives for the hunt as its own reward. Well, for a while (three days) then he gets bored and settles for a trio of wax amaryllis bulbs from Costco.
My heart wasn't in posting yesterday, either. My mood became even darker when the likelihood of another Wilbur plot reared its ugly head. KM'smi d must be bankrupt of ideas if this comes to pass. Wasn't Wilbur brimming with gratidude a few months ago when Dawn returned and he listed all the wonderful things in his life? Sheesh.
So Mary has contributed the entire wedfing spread in addition to the cake? "And one of my specialties!" is pretty self-serving; Mary has put the newlyweds on notice to gush over her talents and generosity ad infinitum. Stand by for salmon squares, Splak cassoulet, banana bread, prune fruit cups, and muffins. She even has homemade treats for the dogs and cats -- meow, woof!
Holy moly, I'm appalled by the typos in my post above! I don't know where all those letters between "KM" and "must" came from,and I do know how to spell "gratitude." The prospect of another "poor, poor, miserable me" turn by Wilbur is interfering with my brainwaves.
So, Mary catered the wedding reception? Salmon squares, definitely, and a magnificent multi-tiered muffin wedding cake. I wonder if she still uses Kelk and Splak in her cuisine.
I agree with all who commented about feeling down. I want to gripe and carp about Mary. I really do. Kind of wondering about the comment, "...one of my specialties". Are we supposed to wonder what the others are? Being nosy? Frigidity? Being pushy and judgemental? (uh oh, I can feel the sadness interfering with my snark. Sob).
Thanks for a much needed laugh, friends. I'm thinking about moving to the Worthiverse... As for Mary's "specialties", there's something truly pathetic about how she has to announce that she has them at every possible opportunity. Get that woman a therapist! Too bad Dr. Sweater Vest wasn't invited to the wedding.
Mary is always willing to share her recipes, but she always leaves out a critical ingredient so no one else's food tastes just like hers (maybe a good thing?). Wilbur loves Mary's cooking, but since he has the taste and sensitivity of a rock, it's not much of a complement.
I keep wondering, who the heck invited Wilbur? Nobody likes him, and we know he’s Estelle’s worst nightmare. I’m presuming that Jeff is Mary’s plus-one, so perhaps Wilbur is a wedding crasher? (On a side note: there are at least three pets present, two of them long-haired cats. That must be a particularly good new medication Jeff is taking, since he’s used his life-threatening allergies to veto every pet Mary has ever taken in.)
The laws of the Worthiverse are being bent! Saul and Eve are married, and were supposed to disappear. I suppose they brought their dogs with them. Somebody check on Jeff. He’s probably in a Benadryl induced stupor by now.
Eve should register for "Updating Your Wardrobe While Refraining from Wearing Matching Neckerchiefs with Your Dog."
Sunday: The dining room is about the size of a walk-in closet and the guests are jammed together. That explains why Ed and Estelle are standing -- no room to sit -- and the wine glasses are one inch in diameter. Is the "self-serve buffet" set up on a windowsill?
Ah, the first victory lap at sea! A momentous occasion indeed. Mary's taking full credit, too, with her pride in making it all happen. She even manages to foreshadow a potential muffin, err, fly in the ointment: "But I wonder about their future as a married couple..." -- dum dum DAAA! I bet she added that in case Jeff was ready to mumble something about THEIR relationship.
Jeff doubts. (I think it’s Jeff, although visually it seems to be Mary) but I’m going with Jeff. Jeff doubts, and Mary replies, “I only hope that one day they’ll have what we have.” Jeff answers with an emphatic, “Yes!” but is actually thinking that at the end of _this_ day the only thing he’ll have is a $300 fuel bill to tank up his tubby plastic yacht again.
Lifestyle guru and taste doyenne Martha Stewart is appearing at a book signing (and selling- pay the cashier before getting in line, please) featuring her newest cookbook, “Muffins, Cupcakes, Biscuits, Scones, and Crumpets“.
The Charterstone residents and hangers-on have chartered a minibus and are among the earliest arrivals. First up (of course) to get her book signed and to schmooze with Martha is Mary Worth.
‘Hello, Martha, I’m Mary Worth, you probably remember me from-‘
‘Yes, Mary, you were my Sunday School teacher when I was in kindergarten- I remember that purple dress. And, I also remember you had an affair with my grandfather on the 25th anniversary of.Armistice Day. Good day.’
‘Sputter, sputter…’
Next up, Toby Cameron.
‘Hello, Toby, I own some of your crude grey ceramic figures of farm animals. I’ve used them to decorate the gardener’s outhouse at my farm in Bedford. Did you have an affair with my ex husband one weekend in the Hamptons?’
‘Well…maybe…’
Here’s Wilbur;
Martha cannot suppress a moue when she sees his greasy combover and smells his mayo breath. “Did I have an affair with you on a cruise ship? I always did like a bit of the crude and grimy type…’
‘Sorry, Ms. Stewart, I’m afraid I don’t recall. Could you please sign the book, To Wilbur, in memory of hot tropical nights at sea?’
‘Sure, but just to warn ye, er, you, it’s gin mixed with pure estrogen XR.’
Ian sips, then says in a high pitched voice. ‘It’s mighty strong and mighty braw, thank ye. Ah’ll nay be buying a book, though.’
Estelle steps up. ‘Hello. Martha, does your book have any tips for a new bride who’s also a pet owner?’
‘Yes, but it’s too late to warn you that you looked ridiculous in the Princess Diana dress. And it’s almost too late for you to loosen the collar on that poor brachycephalic French bulldog, but do it quickly while he still has a chance.’
‘Hello, Martha, may I call you Martha? I’m Dr. Jeff, I save lives, I volunteer in Vietnam, and I have a boat.’
Martha purrs. ‘Is it a big boat you have, Jeff? Would you like to take me for a ride on your big boat?’
‘Well, Mary says my boat is very big. I’d be happy to give you a ride and then the three of us could go to the Bum Boat for dinner.’
‘Would that be Mary Worth that’s going, also? I just remembered I have to frost a cake. Book signing’s over!’
Brava, meg! That was just what I needed to keep me from jumping ship in Mary's self-congratlatory sea! (Side bar: Mary's busting out all over, isn't she?)
Brava, meg! Martha needs to visit Santa Royale more often! And it’s victory lap, day three, as Jeff makes a clumsy overture and Mary shuts it down hard.
Will Jeff never learn? Don't bring up the impossible notion of SOMETHING DEEPER with Mary while she is busy patting herself on the back for some imagined achievement. Stick to talking about something altruistic like your current volunteer activities at the Clinic for Children with Unrealistic Expectations. Mary loves that stuff...
Thanks for the kind words. Gotta go now; I’m meeting Martha’s ex husband for drinks at the Hamptons Country Club and Rendezvous Spot. May not be home for a few days.
Jeff, Jeff, Jeff! Why do you insist on barking up the same hopeless tree? Mary's just not into you in that way. You have our permission to ask for the moon with someone else; in fact, get busy with numerous someone elses. To start, see if Drew (remember him, your son?) has Ashlee's contact info.
Mary believes what she and Jeff have is the stars but marriage would only be the moon, yet she’s constantly encouraging the people around her to get married or stay married. Reasons for that could be:
1) she doesn’t think they are capable of the “stars” and should just settle for the inferior, that is, the moon, that is, marriage. 2) She doesn’t want to share the “stars” with anyone else.
I’m not sure what the stars are supposed to be but based on what we’ve seen and read, it seems to be a relationship that involved no commitment whatsoever and repeating, on an occasional basis, three or four activities over and over.
I suspect Ms. Davis probably read Mary Worth back in the day, and she would NOT be amused by Mary's use of her words. In fact, if Jeff wanted to have a Bette Davis phrase competition with Mary, he could have said "Fasten your seat belts; we're in for a bumpy ride", which seems like it would have been helpful, given how fast he's driving that boat and how much our characters' hair is being disheveled...
At first glance Mary's response made no sense to me (regardless of the famous Bette line) but the Comics Curmudgeon explained it to me yesterday. Mary doesn't want to be on the hook for gas, maintenance and boat payments.
Way to spice things up, Jeff and Mary! Switch out your tried and true dinner orders. Unfortunately, The Bum Boat cannot accommodate this kind of frivolity, as salmon and surf and turf are the only items on the menu, besides enormous salads and itty bitty forks.
The prospect of seeing Mary in a bathing suit, no matter how modest, propels Jeff into a manic feeding frenzy. He goes all Joey Chestnut and wolfs down his meal in less than a minute.
What?! No suggestion of a possible session of skinny dipping? If they're going to go out on a limb with their dinner menus, why not go all the way with their post dinner activities?! We need some excitement here in the snarkiverse...
Your hilarious and pithy comments presented terrific scenarios, Worthiverse friends! Today the air has gone out of all those balloons: Mary and Jeff were "just kidding!" In all seriousness, how deflating. Our only hope is Jeff perhaps getting a bit randy on their easy stroll...nah, Mary would put him in his place in short order. Jeff's more likely to swipe a spoonful of Mary's dessert (rice pudding) when she's not looking.
Will this be a one-week or two-week victory lap? It could wrap up on Sunday, and then we might launch into a brand new story with brand new characters! Who am I kidding? It’ll be Wilbur. Or Dawn. Or both.
Jeff confesses he cheats- on Wordle. Mary admits she was born as Marvin Worth. Jeff tells Mary it certainly makes no difference- since they’re just friends. Mary confides she’s behind on her Charterstone HOA fees. And that she’s not actually the unofficial manager.
meg, your suggestions are so tantalizing! Unfortunately, we know that Sunday's summary strip will remind us of Ed and Estelle mooning happily over their pets as they sing the praises of Mary Worth, Meddlissima Extraordinaire
Yes, Mary, Estelle has “ended up with something she can live with,” marriage, just “the moon” (which hovers in the background) not the far more lofty self reported “stars” that you and Jeff supposedly have. Perhaps “the stars” represent the quality, feelings, and sensations of an eternally reoccurring third date that is all about the delight of anticipation of what will surely be about to happen. But it never does happen, it just keeps resetting for as long as the Worthiverse exists. This way Mary never has to experience the ups and downs of a long-term relationship like other people. Jeff forgets each time and never catches on. He’s settled for the steak.
Monday: New week, same old same old "plot": It's the Westons AGAIN, with Mary's recycled Thanksgiving dinner tossed in to boot. KM, why are you torturing us? You're in the rut of all ruts. I consulted Wanders's excellent archives yesterday to reminisce with Dear Old Shelly Cohen, Ken Kensington, and all the fun of Mary in NYC. That seems like the golden age compared to this schlock [sigh].
Dawn just invited herself to Thanksgiving dinner. And she didn't even offer to bring something. Not that Mary would allow any else's food to be on her table, of course.
Dawn: “ My mother always dressed in colorful silk caftans or jewel-colored velvet tea dresses. She always drank fine wine or champagne, or brandy, or cognac, or imported gin, or Scotch whisky, or straight vodka, out of crystal glasses, or copper mugs, or old juice glasses, while consorting with ladies like herself, or with phony British noblemen, or family solicitors, or handsome groundskeepers. She seldom remembered my name, and she always screamed when I told her I was Wilbur’s daughter. All in all, I would say she was a typical wealthy woman from Connecticut’s Gold Coast. Please pass the yams. “
Dawn must be pretty hard up for entertainment if she's anticipating a meal that won't happen for a week and a half. Meanwhile: Mary is a bit miffed that Dawn didn't mention her special pumpkin spice muffin cheese cake....
At the very notion of Toby helping with dinner, Mary's jaw clenches and her heart begins racing. She steadies herself against the counter, fearing she's about to hyperventilate. "Toby, give me one of those pills you slip into Ian's drink whenever he gets frisky. STAT!" -- Scottie
If this was your basic situation comedy, it would be foreshadowing a massive culinary disaster, resulting in everyone having stale Fruity Pebbles over at Wilbur’s. Does KM do foreshadowing? Or comedy?
@fauxprof “Or comedy?” Attempted now and then, but not the kind that actually invokes laughter: I’m remembering the failed muffin monetizer sitting on the floor with, of course, a muffin on top of his head.
Unintentional comedy? Stating the obvious but, yes, that’s why I read MW! However, in the strip on its own, it often sits like the last bit of unused muffin batter sadly drying out in the bowl until it is snatched away from the rising dishwater to be baked to perfection in this blog. Value added, indeed!
The accolades for Mary go on and on... Last week it was Dr. Jeff praising her, and now her neighbors, who apparently have nothing better to do, are getting ready for a doozy of a Thanksgiving, all prepared by Mary. Is she REALLY this bad at delegating? Can't someone else at least make the cranberry sauce?! Guessing everyone at Charterstone is eating microwave meals unless it's a holiday.. Sheesh!
I bet June Brigman would be tickled pink to illustrate Mary Worth as written by our @meg.
This week has presented something we've not seen before: a pre-victory victory lap. We've had Dawn, Toby, and Jeff so far; who's waiting in the wings? Eve, Saul, Max, and Greta? Pierre and Libby "woof!" "meow"? I'm hoping against hope that all this does prefigure a Thanksgiving-dinner disaster, like Mary's oven bursting into flames, a messy outbreak of food poisoning, drunken Wilbur with a karaoke machine, maybe all those things....
fauxprof and KitKat - I only wish that KM's obvious foreshadowing was the prelude for Mary's first culinary disaster ever. However, we've been led down this path too many times before. I think the worst that will happen is that Mary will put on her purple cowl neck sweater backwards. But... speaking of Thanksgiving comedy... If anyone out there has never seen it, or even if you have, check it out again. The Thanksgiving food fight on the old Cheers TV show still makes me laugh after having watched it at least a dozen times.
@hmmm: I was probably thinking of the Big Bang episode where Howard and Bernadette invite the whole gang over, but the always unseen Mrs. Wolowitz is sick in bed and unable to cook. Somehow, I doubt that anyone in Mary’s group would be able to step up like Rajesh.
You know what would be really fun? No one shows up on Thanksgiving. Mary decides to become vegan and serves tofurky. Dr. Jeff brings a date to the dinner. Everyone opts to watch the football game on TV. Trust me: none of that will happen.
My dream scenario is that Ed and Estelle bring along their animals, who normally -- as we well know -- are abnormally well-behaved.
However, when Mary sets down the luscious, aromatic 30-pound turkey, the three pets revert to their natural state and go wild. They leap onto the table and attack the golden-brown bird with gusto.
While Mary recoils in horror, Wilbur takes command. "NOT ON MY WATCH!!!" he screams. Wilbur dives into the center of the table headlong and starts gnawing at one of the turkey legs while trying to swat away the ravenous animals. Meows, Woofs, and Mmmumphhglummmmphs mingle loudly in the mayhem.
Toby snatches the flask from Ian's lips and takes a good long pull. Ed and Estelle kiss deeply. Dawn finally looks up from her phone to take in what's been going on, shrugs, and keeps scrolling. Jeff tries to console Mary while simultaneously copping a feel. She breaks his hand.
One week later: Dawn sees Mary in the hallway and chirpily asks, "Are you hosting Christmas dinner again this year?"
AHHA! Mary confesses that she didn't make the wedding buffet from scratch, she bought everything at Priceco and tossed it together. We didn't even know she has a membership. Scandalous! I bet the turkey she serves on Thanksgiving is not one she pasture raised herself on the Charterstone property, and the pumpkin pie will be defrosted.
Mary’s shopping list: Golden Corral unlimited turkey and stuffing, Yams-a-Million, Creamed Onion King, Ocean Spray Outlet for a gallon -sized log of cranberry sauce, Pies r Us….
This amounts to a scandal in the Worthiverse! Mary doesn’t make everything from scratch! Horrors! Next she’ll confess to jar gravy and Bob Evans Frozen Mashed Potatoes.
No, fauxprof, Mary is showing off her food resilience and ability to use new and modern methods. No 1930's Betty Crocker cookbook for our Mary! She is up to date with rotisserie chicken. So hip, she may use DoorDash to bring that Thanksgiving dinner to her neighbors...
I'm assuming Jeff thinks he's gonna get some if he keeps pumping up Mary, but as @Scotty has pointed out, Mary will break his hand. Meanwhile, it occurred to me immediately that Priceco sells frozen shrimp by the pound in any size you want. No need for a "signature tray", whatever that is. They sell the cocktail sauce too. In fact, you can also buy taquitos. Kind of a weird buffet, when you think about it.
"I have an early meeting tomorrow morning at the hospital! Thanks for dinner, Mom!" "My pleasure, dear..." [quick smooch on cheek]. Jeff has abandoned any thought of getting something from Mary....
The challenge for KM is, can she make this any more dull? Only four more strips between now and Thanksgiving, and I no longer see any prospect of drama.
Perhaps the drama will include Mary's Thanksgiving food shopping trip. At FoodTeam she will encounter Dawn, moping among the cabbages about having seen "Dave" in the citrus aisle with his latest squeeze...
2,587 comments:
«Oldest ‹Older 2401 – 2587 of 2587Estelle got to the point much more quickly than I expected. I’d love it if Mary’s response was “You seem to have a type, don’t you.”
Mary understands Estelle’s feelings. Now she will proceed to tell her why she’s wrong, and any marriage is better than none at all. (Except for Dr. Jeff, of course.)
I love how characters in the Worthiverse are so out of touch with their own history (Estelle) that they can't seem to put any thoughts together unless they are talking to Mary. Maybe there's truth serum in those muffins...
"I traveled to Bali, Fiji, and the Maldives BY MYSELF! Of course, I had a total blast, but I had to carry my luggage BY MYSELF!" -- Scottie
@Scottie, not only did Estelle have to carry her luggage herself, she had to pay the single-room rate. Was she an heiress? Did she have a lot of insurance on Jimmy? She always seems to have plenty of dough.
Job stress as a police officer caused Jimmy's heart attact? His two-pack a day cigarette habit, fast-food diet, and sedentary lifestyle may have played a part too, Estelle.
Buddah: perfect reference for a comic strip... Thank you, Scottie for the reality check.
Mary just repeated back what Estelle had already said. But now she regrets how she treated Ed. Course, she didn’t behave very well, did she? Throwing the ring and all….endangering small dogs in the office. I’m guessing she will explain herself to Ed and he will join a yoga group.
Once again, KM takes the man's side and browbeats the woman until she admits she was in the wrong. (Even Pierre gets to comment while Libby is MIA!) I realize that Estelle is an airhead who seems to have zero self insight, but this is the latest episode of Meddling Mother Mary setting a bumbling woman straight. The only woman in this strip who's not routinely clueless is ... Mary [sigh].
Not the first time I’ve seen a cat on a leash (even in real life) but definitely the only time I’ve seen a cat and a dog walking in tandem on leashes. I don’t think that ever happens. Meanwhile, @KitKat is so right, Estelle can’t even remember why she was upset with Ed now. For the umpteenth time, what does Mary put in those muffins?
It gets worse, Estelle. Ed is now canoodling with formerly estranged cousin Pam, who has convinced him to take a month-long vacation so they can visit Fiji, Bali, and the Maldives. -- Scottie
@Scottie, yes that follows perfectly!
There has to be some obstacle (probably temporary, alas) preventing Estelle and Ed getting back together: it’s in the soap opera writer’s rulebook. Alternatively, Ed could get an attorney to draw up a contract that formalizes and declares to all the world that he is married to his job. The dogs will “woof,” the cats will “meow.” Honeymoon not required.
Hmph, I posted a comment early this morning, but it must be lost in the Interwebs. Take two: @MissScarlet, the secret ingredient in Mary's muffins is Milk of Amnesia.
Coming back for a second time today was worth it to see @Scottie's hilarious comment -- huzzah! Just think how Estelle will react when she returns to Animal Hospital, ready to apologize to Ed, and the Ed-Pam news is delivered by Dr. See.
So we’re back to Meow and Woof. Estelle looks pretty good in skinny jeans. I’ve never tried to walk a cat on a leash, but my father-in-law’s dog made friends with a cat while on a walk, who came home with them and never left. That’s all I’ve got.
"Could Jimmy's DEATH have influenced my actions with Ed?" Ya think it might've, Estelle? Maybe a teensy bit? (Let's take a break to bang our heads against the nearest wall or table as we contemplate the depth of Estelle's cluelessness.)
Coming next week, or maybe by Halloween: Estelle bursts into Animal Hospital, sobbing, and exclaims to Ed, "Oh Ed, I want you to continue your workaholic behavior, even if it kills you! Thanks to Mary and her muffins, I understand your behavior!"
Estelle, since you rank lower than Mrs. Fitz' pet hamster on the list of things Ed cares about -- in fact, you rank lower than every animal on Earth -- workaholism doesn't seem to be the primary issue here. Ed's inability to form normal human relationships is. And I don't think all the muffins in the world can fix that. -- Scottie
Estelle and Ed on the cusp of reuniting now that Estelle has had her head put on straight due to a dose of muffinia. Victory lap for Mary will ensue...
"Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the most clueless one of all?"
Libby and Pierre should play a trick on Mommy and switch up their usual responses. Pierre: "Meow!" Libby: "Woof!" That would inject some humor into this dreary drama.
Next: Mary bumps into Ed, invites him for muffins, Ed comes to see that it is he, not Estelle, that is completely wrong. Then, Estelle and Ed meet by accident in the park and both grovel for forgiveness and another chance. Mary, hiding behind a tree, witnesses it all while her spine begins to emit a pulsating glow. All this has happened before and will happen again.
Tiny gork must be my evil twin
Tiny g/fork has the most entertaining and plotful (not a word) description of what is happening here.... in the Worthiverse.
Estelle must surely be due a smack on the head for her reference to the song "Alone Again, Naturally". Back to karaoke with Wilbur if she dredges up that one...
Kids...mom...daddy...and Shakespeare?? Even Pierre is speechless.
Tiny fork, I think I remember Tiny gork from the original Star Trek.
Oh, a dream sequence! Yeah! I hope Moy isn't leading us on. What will it be?
Estelle marrying Ed and adopting 50 pets?
Estelle making up with Ed and never seeing him again because he's always working?
Estelle throwing chairs in the vet waiting room instead of her ring?
Estelle throwing Ed?
I used to like Estelle, back in the blind date days, not any more, she is as twitty as most of the other characters in MW. Lets dump all this and start a new strip with the cat and dog, same dialogue every day, "Meow" and "Woof".
Hey, gang, does anybody else access MW through their Washington Post subscription? I haven’t been able to see any of the Washington Post comics for two days. I can get all the news stories, columns and puzzles, but no comics.
Boy, this Mommy and Daddy stuff is really grating. Is she knitting booties for them too? Reading them bedtime stories? Throwing them birthday parties? Sheesh. -- Scottie
Hi. Loving the comments. How about a dream sequence with Pierre and Libby heads on baby bodies? Fauprof, try Comics Kingdom , that's where I find MW.
KM herself comments on her dragged-out plot -- "ZZZZZ...."
Ed's not so dreamy. Being a workaholic, obsessed vet has made for an understaffed and overly crowded clinic. Arguments (Estelle and Ed) and gossiping (Estelle and Dr. See) happened in the waiting room in the presence of clients. What responsible pet owner would trust a place like that? Also, Ed made it clear to Estelle that he has no interest in planning their wedding. Estelle is a whiny, clueless, spoiled woman, but Ed is no prize either. (I will now step down from my soapbox.)
Yes, Ed is perfect for Estelle’ a dreamy man she never has to see.
Gave up on WaPo, and signed up for Comics Kingdom, as Thunderheels suggested, so I’m caught up. KM and June have given us some wildly surreal dream sequences in the past, and this one is cued up for Sunday. I’m actually looking forward to this! (Gonna keep the WaPo subscription, BTW. The puzzles are pretty good!)
My guess is that Estelle's dream will turn out to be a nightmare where she's banging on the windows of the church during Ed's wedding to Pam.
BTW - fauxprof - At the Seattle Times you can read the Mary Worth strip. No sign-up necessary.
Elderbride’s Monthly Magazine confirms:
Beautiful 20-year-old blonde British princess stuns in elaborate ruffled wedding gown.
Grey- haired 65-year-old American vet’s assistant- not so much.
@meg, perfectly put. Even Estelle's dreams/nightmares are nonsense. I wonder if the Diana dress was KM's idea or if June came up with it.
Face it, Estelle: You and Wilbur are meant for each other.
Oh rats! She woke up. That was a short dream!
So the dog and cat just sit on her bed watching her sleep all night? Yeah, okay. Man, this story actually gets stupider every day. -- Scottie
I'm trying to decide which is the scarier part of her nightmare. Wilbur or that horrific wedding gown?
Wilbur, puckering up. That’s the stuff of nightmares. Or instant nausea, if you’re awake.
Had a hunch. The guy with the beard on left in the wedding audience looks a lot like June Brigman’s spouse, Roy Richardson.
Big day today! This may be one of the longest AAAUUUGGGHH!s in MW history, and rightly so. (Wilbur is such a character that his AUGH deserves a full 11 characters in itself).
Thanks, meg, for the Princess Di reference! Always a Wilbur-themed nightmare to get Worthiverse denizens' heads on straight. At this rate, maybe it's time to stop the advice from Mary and just give sleeping pills to the tortured folks who need to make decisions.
Let the groveling begin.
Estelle: "Oh, Ed. I'm so sorry! I realize now that I made a huge mistake when I called off our wedding. Can you please, please forgive me?"
Ed: "Huh? What are you talking about? Oh, yeah! That's right. I remember now! In all my excitement of being able to save the life of Mrs. Fitz's poodle, I'd forgotten all about that. Sure, no problem; no worries. Now... Chop Chop! Time for you to get busy. Those animal cages won't clean themselves!"
"Oh, Ed, I'm so sorry. I'm begging you -- please take me for granted and pay as little attention to me as you wish. It was silly of me to think that you should actually care about me. I know you love the animals way more than me, but I'll be happy with however many minutes you can squeeze me in for." -- Scottie
Good call on Roy Richardson, @Tiny fork! Is that June herself in front of him? I guess they're sitting on the groom's side since Mary and Jeff are on the other side. Does that mean June and Roy are friends of Wilbur?
I expected Estelle's dream to last longer than one day. A floating Ed head rates a "meh...."
@KitKat, I think you’re right!
Looks like Estelle is using the dress she wore to Estranged Cousin Pam's engagement party as a nightie.
No, Estelle, if Ed is married to his work, Animal Hospital is his spouse!
Estelle should consider changing her name to Medusa.
The way Estelle is setting up her game plan makes me think it’s not going to go well, not at all. On the other hand, Estelle has had her “Met With Mary,” muffining, and once that happened, people usually come to her senses (Mary’s senses, to be clear) and things usually go well after that. So it’s a toss up: which way will the muffin land?
I hope that Ed and Estelle make up, go down to the courthouse and quietly get married. Then, per the laws of the Worthiverse, we will never see them or their annoying pets again. No more woof. No more meow. The downside is that we’ll probably get another Wilbur story. The last time we saw him (other than the nightmare kissy-kissy Sunday strip), he seemed to be gearing up to blight his daughter’s life.
Maybe @hmmm is right. Ed will have been so busy and distracted that he won’t have noticed Estelle’s absence. He will be in the middle of meatball surgery on two boxers and a Frenchy that got hit by a semi on highway 101. Estelle will scrub in and assist,
Well, we can all be thrilled that THAT is off the table.
Unless Moy is jerking us around. -- Scottie
Enough with the Mommy and Daddy business [cringe] - egad.
So Estelle is going to beg Ed to take her back and promise that she won't make a peep when he devotes all his time to Animal Hospital while she stays home conversing with the kids ("Meow, woof, meow meow woof woof...") and drinking many bottles of wine.
Just a mention of Wilbur is enough that Libby is showing teeth! Sic’em, Libby!
And there it is! Full circle self denial. I wonder if Mary will officiate the ceremony. I’m sure she has her on-line credentials from the church of the Meddlesome Biddies.
“Damage control”? That’s an understatement. Estelle flung the ring, bounced it off Ed’s chest, and said “…the wedding is off!” Her potential marriage isn’t “damaged,” it’s sunk, lying on the bottom with a big hole in its side.
Ed has forgotten Estelle entirely, except for a vague feeling that he used to have a receptionist. “I wonder if that lady who used to answer the phone is volunteering somewhere else?” he muses, as he puts a ring he found on the floor in the lost and found box
Considering Ed has made NO effort to try to patch things up with Estelle, I think you're all correct, and he will be deeply embedded in furball retrieval surgery on an angora cat by the time Estelle arrives at his office. Either that or he's been so despondent Estelle will find him lying in a box of used cat litter, sobbing.
"Stell?" See, Ed HAS forgotten who she is. He better hope she doesn't confuse the accelerator pedal with the brake.
Their ‘favorite spot’? Ooh, is this about to get all racy?
@meg, nah. Their favorite spot is the puppy pads aisle at Petdumb, Santa Royale's biggest (and only) pet supplies retailer.
Well that wrapped up quickly. No retelling of life with Jimmy or muffins with Mary. It’s almost like Moy didn’t want to drag out the story. Oops! Too late.
[Queue the purple clouds, falling leaves, and doves]
Off camera, I think Mary must have got to Ed with muffins.
Looks like their favorite spot is a bridge in Central Park- and the path is covered with snow? Ah, forget it, Jake- it’s the Worthiverse.
So much for the Major Nuptials. And who invited Wilbur? Oh, well, I guess if all the random pets can get along, the random pest is no problem.
The bridge (which none of us have seen before, despite it being the lovebirds' favorite spot) seems to be very steep. If we're lucky, that river of slush/wet concrete/gray lava/unknown substance will sweep Estelle and Ed into the creek, where they'll be attacked by that group of waterfowl. Just deserts for the workaholic veterenarian and his dim-witted sweetie receptionist.
"Oh, Ed, I'm so glad we patched things up! Now will you come with me to look at animal masks?"
Ed's eyes widen and his jaw clenches. What will he say? What WILL Ed say???!!! -- Scottie
Nice try, Scottie, trying to gin up some drama here... I'm wondering where those falling leaves are coming from, considering the strip is set in California. Perhaps the leaves are referencing how dry it is out west, and we can expect a nice wildfire to break out soon.
Estelle is not saying "Oh, darling...", she's saying "Boh, schmarleen mumble mumble."
"I decided to make some changes. First, I'm selling my practice to my nephew Steven. I figure you have enough money for both of us and our furry children."
I hope the new partner is not Dr. See. Actually, I do hope the new partner is Dr. See.
Isn’t this where we came in? Ed lost Stephen as his second vet, and then Estelle began helping out as the receptionist with a sub-plan. I wouldn’t mind seeing Dr. See in the role. It would be fun to watch Estelle wrestle with her jealously. So, of course that won’t happen. I wonder if we will even get to see who Ed hires on. Moy will probably just skip over that. Sigh.
@MissScarlet -- Oh, I definitely see See, Senorita. Estelle will get some stalking tips from Wilbur, and she'll be spying on the two of them every chance she gets.
Then when she's sufficiently deranged again, maybe she'll burst into Ed's waiting room and throw her engagement ring at Sheila this time. -- Scottie
I notice that KM has resorted to calling Estelle "Stell", as we know Wilbur did, even naming one of his fish "Stell". I am glad to see that visitors to this blog have not caved in and started calling her "Stell". Definitely an anti-Wilbur vote that KM is ignoring at her peril.. Sorry, I'm preoccupied with thinking about votes these days...
I agree with @MissScarlet. Now that Estelle has admitted she was WRONG and begged Ed for forgiveness, which Ed graciously accepted, KM will hastily skip over the partner business so the lovebirds can continue to smooch and make googoo eyes at each other. Far be it from KM to have Ed hire a comely newly graduated veterinarian, Dr. Isolde Parnon.
How about this: Ed and Estelle's marriage certificate will list "Stell" as her given name, and unbeknownst to the happy couple their marriage is invalid.
Uh oh! I hope I'm not the last to comment here... Given the pace of this plot I can see why there's not a lot to say. C'mon, everybody! I'm sure we'll get to see Libby and Pierre dressed up for the wedding soon!!
Far be it from me to spoil the joy of this loving moment, but I keep hearing the sound of a cello slowly groaning in the background in anticipation of Estelle meeting Ed's new (and former?) partner. And I don't mean nephew Steven. -- Scottie
The cake does not rank as a culinary creation. It’s just three plain layers with some plastic roses stuck on it. The only thing impressive is that Mary had enough pull to get a special order of mauve Skittles flown in to make a border for the base.
I guess we can thank Ed Dill (was that his name?) for teaching Mary how to ice a cake. Estelle did a great job of scaling down the wedding. Mary provides the cake as her wedding gift; roses not tigers or bears; and everyone gets Milk of Amnesia (@KitKat) in every slice.
Ah, The Comics Curmudgeon reminds me that his name was 'John Dill'.
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On Thursday, October 31, 2024, 15:47, mtrehub@aol.com wrote:
Well, looky who’s here! Celebrity wedding officiant Minnesota Governor Tim Walz!
Let’s listen:
Walz: If anyone here knows any reason why this couple should not be joined in holy matrimony, speak now or forever hold your peace.
Cousin Deb: Well, I…
Wilbur: In my opinion…
Walz, Estelle, and Ed; Mind your own darn business!
Woof! Meow!
PS. Looks like Estelle went with a shorter, blue version of the Diana gown.
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Thanks, meg! I can absolutely see Tim Walz officiating at this wedding, except the ticket probably doesn't need more California voters. Since tomorrow is Friday, I am expecting at least a panel or two of Ed and Estelle, possibly rehearsing for their upcoming appearance on "The Newlywed Game", where they will win a new washer and dryer to help with dealing with all that pet hair.
@meg and @LouiseF, you seem to have gotten access to a premium preview of "Dr. Harding Gets a Wife (in His Living Room)" yesterday afternoon. What's your secret? Yesterday was cake day in my paper, wherein Mary appears to be about to stab herself in the nose.
Boy, KM can put a plot into overdrive when she's motivated. We went from "My darling!" on Wednesday to "several weeks later" yesterday to Ed's living room today. Governor Walz isn't the only celebrity - the baseball legend Babe Ruth has materialized in place of Dr. Jeff Cory!
How does Mary know that Ed is a good match for Estelle? Has Mary ever met him?
What? We don't get to see Ed's new assistant? And no drama pertaining thereto? I feel cheated.
Unless . . .
Ed is concealing the identity of his new assistant from Estelle because he's afraid that she'll have some childish jealousy fit. But then Estelle will learn what Ed's up to and she'll have some childish jealousy fit.
And if this does indeed happen, I'm sure I will rue the day I hoped for it. -- Scottie
Yes, KitKat, I have a secret back channel to learn of future plot developments. Here’s tomorrow’s story: Mary is carefully transferring the wedding cake to the buffet table. Suddenly, a very inebriated Ian Cameron and buzzed out Toby appear through the front door, too late for the ceremony, but eager for the after party. In their rush to the bar cart, (here it comes, folks, the encounter you’ve been awaiting) they cross Mary’s path, sending her sprawling on the floor. But the cake is intact! Until Ian also falls, crushing the wedding cake against Mary’s purple suit. Ian is outraged. “Guid laird, hen! Can ye not gie out of yer ain way?” Pierre, Libby, Odin, Greta and Max move in and gobble down the cake. (Some later throw up on the carpet.)
Actually, when you go to “Read Today’s Mary Worth comic at the Official Mary Worth website!”, you will see the option to read a few days ahead.
Thanks for confessing, @meg, though you well deserve that secret back channel. I tried to take a peek at tomorrow's exciting episode (at KM's surprisingly hectic pace, it might be Estelle and Ed's seventh anniversary, with both of them getting the seven-year itch), but I was prompted to subscribe to Comics Kingdom. However, the flashback to Iris saving Zak at the Piccodee Falls cliff "with a strength born of love" was entertaining.
A nice Friday wrap up... Pretty sure Ed's ex is in attendance here as Woman with Tasteful White Streak in her Hair. And, of course, meg has hit it once again with her prediction of Tim Walz as the wedding officiant. Or did you invoke that Official Mary Worth website to get you on the right track?
I expect Mary will take her vctory lap on Sunday, with the attendees oohing and ahhing as she brings in the cake. In a lighthearted moment, Wilbur will eat the whole top layer himself, including the fake flowers. The festivities will conclude with Mary giving the guests little purple sacks (made by her, of course) of muffin crumbs, which the guests will toss at Estelle and Ed. The happy couple will drive off for their honeymoon, with Libby, Pierre, and Odin in the back seat.
Mary will spend next week rehashing everything with a bored Toby.
Ashamed of his continuous unheroism, Wilbur's getting ready to spiral again. Drunken, unshaven, self-pitying slob Wilbur is the only Wilbur I enjoy, and I enjoy it very much. -- Scottie
Quick, Mary, Wilbur needs a muffin; he’s becoming self-aware!
"Cards" have nothing to do with it Wilbur.
In real life, Wilbur could be a hot commodity in the senior dating pool. He’s somewhat wealthy, he’s younger than Brad Pitt or George Clooney, he’s not totally hairless, he has an interesting career that involves travel…I vote for a newly revamped Wilbur to hit the dating scene. He’ll take walks with Mary, he’ll join Zak at the gym, he’ll eat a better diet, he’ll have a Vin Diesel style hairstyle (bye bye, combover), and he’ll have a new wardrobe from Santa Royale’s chicest men’s store, “Tall & Fat or Short and Stout”. Then he hits the senior social circuit- SR film society, Temple SR Mah Jongg, Parents Without Partners,
Boors and Babes…..Eventually he’ll show up at a pool party with a date. She’ll be totally unsuitable and Mary and Toby will take over from there. Then Wilbur will be Alone Again, Naturally, and the cycle of life will begin again. Next story: Dawn’s Unsuitable new boyfriend.
Wilbur's "cards" comment speaks to his ongoing addiction, which is about to become gambling, I'm guessing.
"Close friends," Ed? Have you ever met Dr. Jeff? He's the guy by the window, trying to stave off an asthma attack due to all the dander and cat and dog hair in your house.
When is Mary's wedding cake going to be served? Time to break out the tiny plates, tiny forks (here's lookin' at you, @Tiny fork!), and doll-size wine glasses.
@KitKat -- Your Jeff gasping for air scenario literally made me laugh out loud! -- Scottie
Eight people, a bunch of annoying animals, and an upright piano in Ed's tiny living room is claustrophobic. Lemme outta here (and no "ha ha ha!")!!
I don't know what song Ed and Estelle are singing, and I don't care enough to Google it.
@KitKat yes, I was hoping for some actual tiny forks but none yet and no longer hopeful as they’ve moved on to the singing/yowling segment.
Wilbur is standing near Dr. See. New relationship possibility? Well, he couldn’t handle four-legged pets, but does still have Willa if he hasn’t cared her to death by now. He could bring Willa (or similar) in for an appointment with Dr. See and then “deftly” invite her for a cruise. Preposterous, yes, but with Wilbur the impossible becomes preposterously possible on a regular basis.
Seeing how much the guests and the animals are enjoying watching Ed and Estelle butcher both lyrics and music, Wilbur rushes back to his apartment and grabs his bagpipes. "Oh, they're going to LOVE this!" he thinks to himself as he rushes back. -- Scottie
Uh oh. I see a Wilbur story looming on the horizon.
Like I’m not bummed enough today, we are about to launch into a Wilbur story. Thanks, KM, I’m all cheered up now.
fauxprof - I'm with you. I'm feeling pretty much the same way as Charlton Heston did when he saw the Statue of Liberty in the movie, Planet of the Apes.
@fauxprof: Amen, sister, amen. -- Scottie
The black hole that is Wilbur seems to be drawing the next plot line his way yet again. Perhaps he’ll return home, find Willa floating and declare, “I’m done with fish!” Then starts a new life as an orchid thief. He won’t find any in Santa Royale (I mean wild ones) but that doesn’t matter as he lives for the hunt as its own reward. Well, for a while (three days) then he gets bored and settles for a trio of wax amaryllis bulbs from Costco.
My heart wasn't in posting yesterday, either. My mood became even darker when the likelihood of another Wilbur plot reared its ugly head. KM'smi d must be bankrupt of ideas if this comes to pass. Wasn't Wilbur brimming with gratidude a few months ago when Dawn returned and he listed all the wonderful things in his life? Sheesh.
So Mary has contributed the entire wedfing spread in addition to the cake? "And one of my specialties!" is pretty self-serving; Mary has put the newlyweds on notice to gush over her talents and generosity ad infinitum. Stand by for salmon squares, Splak cassoulet, banana bread, prune fruit cups, and muffins. She even has homemade treats for the dogs and cats -- meow, woof!
Holy moly, I'm appalled by the typos in my post above! I don't know where all those letters between "KM" and "must" came from,and I do know how to spell "gratitude." The prospect of another "poor, poor, miserable me" turn by Wilbur is interfering with my brainwaves.
So, Mary catered the wedding reception? Salmon squares, definitely, and a magnificent multi-tiered muffin wedding cake. I wonder if she still uses Kelk and Splak in her cuisine.
I agree with all who commented about feeling down. I want to gripe and carp about Mary. I really do. Kind of wondering about the comment, "...one of my specialties". Are we supposed to wonder what the others are? Being nosy? Frigidity? Being pushy and judgemental? (uh oh, I can feel the sadness interfering with my snark. Sob).
@KitKat - Pleaze don wurry bout yur tipos. I thing manny of uz are selve medikating thiz weak.
Helen (hic) Clark
Thanks for a much needed laugh, friends. I'm thinking about moving to the Worthiverse... As for Mary's "specialties", there's something truly pathetic about how she has to announce that she has them at every possible opportunity. Get that woman a therapist! Too bad Dr. Sweater Vest wasn't invited to the wedding.
@HelenClark, it's wonderful to hear from you! You've [hic] been [snore] missed! [zzzzzz...]
Mary, we know what a buffet is, thank you.
Mary is always willing to share her recipes, but she always leaves out a critical ingredient so no one else's food tastes just like hers (maybe a good thing?). Wilbur loves Mary's cooking, but since he has the taste and sensitivity of a rock, it's not much of a complement.
I keep wondering, who the heck invited Wilbur? Nobody likes him, and we know he’s Estelle’s worst nightmare. I’m presuming that Jeff is Mary’s plus-one, so perhaps Wilbur is a wedding crasher? (On a side note: there are at least three pets present, two of them long-haired cats. That must be a particularly good new medication Jeff is taking, since he’s used his life-threatening allergies to veto every pet Mary has ever taken in.)
Wilbur photo bombing again. Yes, why is he there?
Many of us feeling sad. I could use one of Mary’s magic muffins. [slaps own face and says, get a grip!]
@KitKat - Thanks, KitKat. Good to be back. The real world has now become weirder and more frightening than the Worthiverse.
I laughed when my Thursday remark that Mary was being self-serving was followed yesterday with Mary belting "It's a self-serve buffet!"
Ed's house looks tiny on the outside, but there's room for everything: a piano, a dining room, giant floral arrangements that dwarf Saul.
Any booze in the dining room? Wilbur needs to get drunk as a skunk and unleash a torrent of embarrassing remarks.
The laws of the Worthiverse are being bent! Saul and Eve are married, and were supposed to disappear. I suppose they brought their dogs with them. Somebody check on Jeff. He’s probably in a Benadryl induced stupor by now.
Lesson for the day; dogs and senior recreation classes are good.
Eve should register for "Updating Your Wardrobe While Refraining from Wearing Matching Neckerchiefs with Your Dog."
Sunday: The dining room is about the size of a walk-in closet and the guests are jammed together. That explains why Ed and Estelle are standing -- no room to sit -- and the wine glasses are one inch in diameter. Is the "self-serve buffet" set up on a windowsill?
I am glad Mary recognizes her part in reuniting Estelle and Ed. She believes in love? Where does that leave Dr. Jeff?
Estelle looks older in every panel. Either Mary is a psychic vampire, or June is really tired of drawing these people.
Thanks, KM, for the heavy handed tribute to Mary's enduring wisdom.
Ah, the first victory lap at sea! A momentous occasion indeed. Mary's taking full credit, too, with her pride in making it all happen. She even manages to foreshadow a potential muffin, err, fly in the ointment: "But I wonder about their future as a married couple..." -- dum dum DAAA! I bet she added that in case Jeff was ready to mumble something about THEIR relationship.
Victory lap, day one. But Mary has misgivings. Or Jeff does. I’m not sure who is talking, nor do I care.
Jeff doubts. (I think it’s Jeff, although visually it seems to be Mary) but I’m going with Jeff. Jeff doubts, and Mary replies, “I only hope that one day they’ll have what we have.” Jeff answers with an emphatic, “Yes!” but is actually thinking that at the end of _this_ day the only thing he’ll have is a $300 fuel bill to tank up his tubby plastic yacht again.
At least the dolphins are happy. O course, I'm sure they have more sex than Mary and Jeff.
Santa Royale Book News
Big excitement at the Santa Royale Book Mart!
Lifestyle guru and taste doyenne Martha Stewart is appearing at a book signing (and selling- pay the cashier before getting in line, please) featuring her newest cookbook, “Muffins, Cupcakes, Biscuits, Scones, and Crumpets“.
The Charterstone residents and hangers-on have chartered a minibus and are among the earliest arrivals.
First up (of course) to get her book signed and to schmooze with Martha is Mary Worth.
‘Hello, Martha, I’m Mary Worth, you probably remember me from-‘
‘Yes, Mary, you were my Sunday School teacher when I was in kindergarten- I remember that purple dress.
And, I also remember you had an affair with my grandfather on the 25th anniversary of.Armistice Day. Good day.’
‘Sputter, sputter…’
Next up, Toby Cameron.
‘Hello, Toby, I own some of your crude grey ceramic figures of farm animals. I’ve used them to decorate the gardener’s outhouse at my farm in Bedford. Did you have an affair with my ex husband one weekend in the Hamptons?’
‘Well…maybe…’
Here’s Wilbur;
Martha cannot suppress a moue when she sees his greasy combover and smells his mayo breath. “Did I have an affair with you on a cruise ship? I always did like a bit of the crude and grimy type…’
‘Sorry, Ms. Stewart, I’m afraid I don’t recall. Could you please sign the book, To Wilbur, in memory of hot tropical nights at sea?’
And Ian: ‘Hello, ye lovely guid lady. Could ye spare a wee swig from the flask ye have tucked away in yer capacious décolletage? I’m nae particular abit vintage.’
‘Sure, but just to warn ye, er, you, it’s gin mixed with pure estrogen XR.’
Ian sips, then says in a high pitched voice. ‘It’s mighty strong and mighty braw, thank ye. Ah’ll nay be buying a book, though.’
Estelle steps up. ‘Hello. Martha, does your book have any tips for a new bride who’s also a pet owner?’
‘Yes, but it’s too late to warn you that you looked ridiculous in the Princess Diana dress. And it’s almost too late for you to loosen the collar on that poor brachycephalic French bulldog, but do it quickly while he still has a chance.’
‘Hello, Martha, may I call you Martha? I’m Dr. Jeff, I save lives, I volunteer in Vietnam, and I have a boat.’
Martha purrs. ‘Is it a big boat you have, Jeff? Would you like to take me for a ride on your big boat?’
‘Well, Mary says my boat is very big. I’d be happy to give you a ride and then the three of us could go to the Bum Boat for dinner.’
‘Would that be Mary Worth that’s going, also? I just remembered I have to frost a cake. Book signing’s over!’
Brava, meg! That was just what I needed to keep me from jumping ship in Mary's self-congratlatory sea! (Side bar: Mary's busting out all over, isn't she?)
self-congratulatory
meg- that is great! On to today's strip. Mary should have been a gunner in WW2. She is great at shooting down Dr. Jeff.
@Meg Thank you, needed that!
Yeah!!! @ Meg!! Wonderful!! Thank you!!
And Mary says: Say no more Jeff. We can't jinx this with sex, you know that.
Brava, meg! Martha needs to visit Santa Royale more often! And it’s victory lap, day three, as Jeff makes a clumsy overture and Mary shuts it down hard.
Will Jeff never learn? Don't bring up the impossible notion of SOMETHING DEEPER with Mary while she is busy patting herself on the back for some imagined achievement. Stick to talking about something altruistic like your current volunteer activities at the Clinic for Children with Unrealistic Expectations. Mary loves that stuff...
Thanks for the kind words. Gotta go now; I’m meeting Martha’s ex husband for drinks at the Hamptons Country Club and Rendezvous Spot. May not be home for a few days.
Jeff, Jeff, Jeff! Why do you insist on barking up the same hopeless tree? Mary's just not into you in that way. You have our permission to ask for the moon with someone else; in fact, get busy with numerous someone elses. To start, see if Drew (remember him, your son?) has Ashlee's contact info.
Miss Bette Davis would like her iconic line back. You don’t want to mess with her, Mary. She may be dead, but she can still take you!
Mary believes what she and Jeff have is the stars but marriage would only be the moon, yet she’s constantly encouraging the people around her to get married or stay married. Reasons for that could be:
1) she doesn’t think they are capable of the “stars” and should just settle for the inferior, that is, the moon, that is, marriage.
2) She doesn’t want to share the “stars” with anyone else.
I’m not sure what the stars are supposed to be but based on what we’ve seen and read, it seems to be a relationship that involved no commitment whatsoever and repeating, on an occasional basis, three or four activities over and over.
I suspect Ms. Davis probably read Mary Worth back in the day, and she would NOT be amused by Mary's use of her words. In fact, if Jeff wanted to have a Bette Davis phrase competition with Mary, he could have said "Fasten your seat belts; we're in for a bumpy ride", which seems like it would have been helpful, given how fast he's driving that boat and how much our characters' hair is being disheveled...
At first glance Mary's response made no sense to me (regardless of the famous Bette line) but the Comics Curmudgeon explained it to me yesterday. Mary doesn't want to be on the hook for gas, maintenance and boat payments.
For as much headway as Jeff has been making in his quest to seduce the Queen Mary, he might as well rename his tub the TITANIC. -- Scottie
If Jeff and Mary really want to shake up the usual order of things, why didn't they go to a different restaurant instead of (egad!) the Bum Boat?
Swimming after dinner? I think Mary's planning on bumping off Jeff.
Way to spice things up, Jeff and Mary! Switch out your tried and true dinner orders. Unfortunately, The Bum Boat cannot accommodate this kind of frivolity, as salmon and surf and turf are the only items on the menu, besides enormous salads and itty bitty forks.
The prospect of seeing Mary in a bathing suit, no matter how modest, propels Jeff into a manic feeding frenzy. He goes all Joey Chestnut and wolfs down his meal in less than a minute.
"Come on, Mary, finish up, finish up! Let's go, let's go, let's go!"
When Mary doesn't hurry up, Jeff causes such a scene that they are asked to leave and never come back.
Jeff is ecstatic. "Yes! Yes! Yes! Oh thank you!" -- Scottie
Mary: Jeff, I’d love to go swimming, but there’s a hole in the knee of my bathing suit.”
@Meg: you made me laugh out loud and wake up my dog!
BTW Mary, the water in Santa Barbara (ahem, Santa Royale) is 60 degrees now. Watch out for hypothermia.
What?! No suggestion of a possible session of skinny dipping? If they're going to go out on a limb with their dinner menus, why not go all the way with their post dinner activities?! We need some excitement here in the snarkiverse...
Tee-hee! Louise said ‘go all the way’!
Your hilarious and pithy comments presented terrific scenarios, Worthiverse friends! Today the air has gone out of all those balloons: Mary and Jeff were "just kidding!" In all seriousness, how deflating. Our only hope is Jeff perhaps getting a bit randy on their easy stroll...nah, Mary would put him in his place in short order. Jeff's more likely to swipe a spoonful of Mary's dessert (rice pudding) when she's not looking.
Will this be a one-week or two-week victory lap? It could wrap up on Sunday, and then we might launch into a brand new story with brand new characters! Who am I kidding? It’ll be Wilbur. Or Dawn. Or both.
Fingers crossed; they get mugged and robbed while on their stroll.
They walk on the pier and get abducted by a kraken.
They walk on the beach and are swept out to sea by a rogue wave.
They walk in the park and are run over by Chinese bicyclists.
Jeff confesses he cheats- on Wordle.
Mary admits she was born as Marvin Worth.
Jeff tells Mary it certainly makes no difference- since they’re just friends.
Mary confides she’s behind on her Charterstone HOA fees. And that she’s not actually the unofficial manager.
meg, your suggestions are so tantalizing! Unfortunately, we know that Sunday's summary strip will remind us of Ed and Estelle mooning happily over their pets as they sing the praises of Mary Worth, Meddlissima Extraordinaire
@meg, if only.
"Do you want DESSERT, Mary?"
"That's all right, Jeff. I have muffins in my purse."
This victory lap has lasted longer than Estelle and Ed's wedding did.
Next up for Mary: time in the laboratory (her kitchen) to develop her Thanksgiving menu. She’s working on a special main dish- the Turmuffin.
All Estelle ever wanted was making whoopee with animals crawling all over the bed?
We can take this to the bank: We'll never see Mary and Jeff anywhere near a bed.
And thank goodness for that!
Nothing spells romance like a dog sniffing its privates and a cat litter box under the bed.
Yes, Mary, Estelle has “ended up with something she can live with,” marriage, just “the moon” (which hovers in the background) not the far more lofty self reported “stars” that you and Jeff supposedly have. Perhaps “the stars” represent the quality, feelings, and sensations of an eternally reoccurring third date that is all about the delight of anticipation of what will surely be about to happen. But it never does happen, it just keeps resetting for as long as the Worthiverse exists. This way Mary never has to experience the ups and downs of a long-term relationship like other people. Jeff forgets each time and never catches on. He’s settled for the steak.
Oh come on! Moy is toying with us. Those animals would not be sitting quietly and believe me, it would not be romantic.
Monday: New week, same old same old "plot": It's the Westons AGAIN, with Mary's recycled Thanksgiving dinner tossed in to boot. KM, why are you torturing us? You're in the rut of all ruts. I consulted Wanders's excellent archives yesterday to reminisce with Dear Old Shelly Cohen, Ken Kensington, and all the fun of Mary in NYC. That seems like the golden age compared to this schlock [sigh].
Dawn just invited herself to Thanksgiving dinner. And she didn't even offer to bring something. Not that Mary would allow any else's food to be on her table, of course.
Oh, joy, it’s gonna be a Dawn storyline. I’m anticipating a long slog with the problems of the world’s oldest teenager.
Great, Dawn, maybe you can tell us about your visit with your mother, over dinner.
Dawn: “ My mother always dressed in colorful silk caftans or jewel-colored velvet tea dresses. She always drank fine wine or champagne, or brandy, or cognac, or imported gin, or Scotch whisky, or straight vodka, out of crystal glasses, or copper mugs, or old juice glasses, while consorting with ladies like herself, or with phony British noblemen, or family solicitors, or handsome groundskeepers. She seldom remembered my name, and she always screamed when I told her I was Wilbur’s daughter. All in all, I would say she was a typical wealthy woman from Connecticut’s Gold Coast. Please pass the yams. “
Dawn must be pretty hard up for entertainment if she's anticipating a meal that won't happen for a week and a half. Meanwhile: Mary is a bit miffed that Dawn didn't mention her special pumpkin spice muffin cheese cake....
And the Thanksgiving dinner hits keep coming -- today it's Toby, sipping vodka from a mug and remembering to kiss Mary's a.., whoops, ring.
@meg, I visualize Nola Wolvenson playing the part of Dawn's mother in your scenario.
Boy, it's mid-November, yet there's nothing on Mary's calendar for 2024.
At the very notion of Toby helping with dinner, Mary's jaw clenches and her heart begins racing. She steadies herself against the counter, fearing she's about to hyperventilate. "Toby, give me one of those pills you slip into Ian's drink whenever he gets frisky. STAT!" -- Scottie
If this was your basic situation comedy, it would be foreshadowing a massive culinary disaster, resulting in everyone having stale Fruity Pebbles over at Wilbur’s. Does KM do foreshadowing? Or comedy?
@fauxprof “Or comedy?” Attempted now and then, but not the kind that actually invokes laughter: I’m remembering the failed muffin monetizer sitting on the floor with, of course, a muffin on top of his head.
Unintentional comedy? Stating the obvious but, yes, that’s why I read MW! However, in the strip on its own, it often sits like the last bit of unused muffin batter sadly drying out in the bowl until it is snatched away from the rising dishwater to be baked to perfection in this blog. Value added, indeed!
Wouldn't it be great if @Meg wrote this strip?
The accolades for Mary go on and on... Last week it was Dr. Jeff praising her, and now her neighbors, who apparently have nothing better to do, are getting ready for a doozy of a Thanksgiving, all prepared by Mary. Is she REALLY this bad at delegating? Can't someone else at least make the cranberry sauce?! Guessing everyone at Charterstone is eating microwave meals unless it's a holiday.. Sheesh!
I bet June Brigman would be tickled pink to illustrate Mary Worth as written by our @meg.
This week has presented something we've not seen before: a pre-victory victory lap. We've had Dawn, Toby, and Jeff so far; who's waiting in the wings? Eve, Saul, Max, and Greta? Pierre and Libby "woof!" "meow"? I'm hoping against hope that all this does prefigure a Thanksgiving-dinner disaster, like Mary's oven bursting into flames, a messy outbreak of food poisoning, drunken Wilbur with a karaoke machine, maybe all those things....
fauxprof and KitKat - I only wish that KM's obvious foreshadowing was the prelude for Mary's first culinary disaster ever. However, we've been led down this path too many times before. I think the worst that will happen is that Mary will put on her purple cowl neck sweater backwards.
But... speaking of Thanksgiving comedy... If anyone out there has never seen it, or even if you have, check it out again. The Thanksgiving food fight on the old Cheers TV show still makes me laugh after having watched it at least a dozen times.
@hmmm: I was probably thinking of the Big Bang episode where Howard and Bernadette invite the whole gang over, but the always unseen Mrs. Wolowitz is sick in bed and unable to cook. Somehow, I doubt that anyone in Mary’s group would be able to step up like Rajesh.
You know what would be really fun?
No one shows up on Thanksgiving.
Mary decides to become vegan and serves tofurky.
Dr. Jeff brings a date to the dinner.
Everyone opts to watch the football game on TV.
Trust me: none of that will happen.
My dream scenario is that Ed and Estelle bring along their animals, who normally -- as we well know -- are abnormally well-behaved.
However, when Mary sets down the luscious, aromatic 30-pound turkey, the three pets revert to their natural state and go wild. They leap onto the table and attack the golden-brown bird with gusto.
While Mary recoils in horror, Wilbur takes command. "NOT ON MY WATCH!!!" he screams. Wilbur dives into the center of the table headlong and starts gnawing at one of the turkey legs while trying to swat away the ravenous animals. Meows, Woofs, and Mmmumphhglummmmphs mingle loudly in the mayhem.
Toby snatches the flask from Ian's lips and takes a good long pull. Ed and Estelle kiss deeply. Dawn finally looks up from her phone to take in what's been going on, shrugs, and keeps scrolling. Jeff tries to console Mary while simultaneously copping a feel. She breaks his hand.
One week later: Dawn sees Mary in the hallway and chirpily asks, "Are you hosting Christmas dinner again this year?"
Mary stares into space.
-- Scottie
Scottie- may I tag along as your plus-one? And I’ll bring giant AI- generated replicas of our late beloved Chin Napkin for everyone. Can’t wait!
AHHA! Mary confesses that she didn't make the wedding buffet from scratch, she bought everything at Priceco and tossed it together. We didn't even know she has a membership. Scandalous! I bet the turkey she serves on Thanksgiving is not one she pasture raised herself on the Charterstone property, and the pumpkin pie will be defrosted.
Mary’s shopping list: Golden Corral unlimited turkey and stuffing, Yams-a-Million, Creamed Onion King, Ocean Spray Outlet for a gallon -sized log of cranberry sauce, Pies r Us….
That explains why Mary’s spare room is full of heavy-duty produce boxes. So hard to break down, but she’ll get to it one day.
This amounts to a scandal in the Worthiverse! Mary doesn’t make everything from scratch! Horrors! Next she’ll confess to jar gravy and Bob Evans Frozen Mashed Potatoes.
No, fauxprof, Mary is showing off her food resilience and ability to use new and modern methods. No 1930's Betty Crocker cookbook for our Mary! She is up to date with rotisserie chicken. So hip, she may use DoorDash to bring that Thanksgiving dinner to her neighbors...
I'm assuming Jeff thinks he's gonna get some if he keeps pumping up Mary, but as @Scotty has pointed out, Mary will break his hand. Meanwhile, it occurred to me immediately that Priceco sells frozen shrimp by the pound in any size you want. No need for a "signature tray", whatever that is. They sell the cocktail sauce too. In fact, you can also buy taquitos. Kind of a weird buffet, when you think about it.
"I have an early meeting tomorrow morning at the hospital! Thanks for dinner, Mom!"
"My pleasure, dear..." [quick smooch on cheek].
Jeff has abandoned any thought of getting something from Mary....
Like two ships barely bumping into each other, then passing in the night.
Passion checked at the door. Romance not allowed.
The challenge for KM is, can she make this any more dull? Only four more strips between now and Thanksgiving, and I no longer see any prospect of drama.
Perhaps the drama will include Mary's Thanksgiving food shopping trip. At FoodTeam she will encounter Dawn, moping among the cabbages about having seen "Dave" in the citrus aisle with his latest squeeze...
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