Thursday, May 25, 2017

Mary Worth 2598

This morning, I was imagining that it was the horses talking, rather than Derek and Katie. Ha ha ha, I thought. That's funny.

But then I read yesterday's comments and Dear Reader Alice introduced me to Latawnya the Naughty Horse who likes drug smoking. Ha ha ha ha, I thought. That's really funny.

And then Dear Reader Cherie sent me an email and made yesterday's smoking horse dreams come true. Ha ha ha ha ha:

21 comments:

Anonymous said...


I hope Katie's wearing industrial-strength Kevlar underwear because . . . well, let's just say there's not going to be much connubial bliss for the rest of the trip.

-- Scottie McW.

fauxprof said...

Bareback and barefoot. He shirtless and she wearing a dress. This could be the cover of a steamy paperback romance novel. Is this not panel of the year material? (About sixty-some years ago I was photographed sitting astride a live pony. That is my sole horseback riding experience. I remember being scared out of my mind.)

Nance said...

Today's Boldface Haiku is titled "Both Stress And Relief Make Derek Miss Smoking. And Horses And Pounding Surfs Make Him Miss It, Too. He Just Really Needs A Cigarette".

Glad...glitch!
Your! OK!
Worried, fine, didn't!
(Do smoking!)


You know, here's the thing. This Smoking Thing as a central plot idea is so lame; really, where can it go? Katie getting stuck in the bathroom had zero to do with it, 3E is only tangentially related to it. It's not really viable. Unless Derek starts a fire by falling asleep with a cigarette in his hand, it has no relevance to the cruise or anything. Having him mention it every few days isn't exactly getting it done.

Sigh. I had to say it. My Inner English/Creative Writing Teacher was killing me.

Chester the Dog said...

How did the horses light their cigarettes?

Chester the Dog said...

@SandiEgo: Lets have horses in every storyline! What fun! Mary meddling with the ponies, Olive strolling through NYC with a chatty mare...

Dave in Parma said...

You know that glitch, where someone locked me in the bathroom.

It reminds me of my eight grade year when a teacher drove a few of us to a local high school for a math competition (yes, I was one of the cool kids). We stopped at McDonalds, and as luck would have it, when we went to the bathroom, the door jammed and three of us couldn't get out. Luckily one of the McDonalds staff members came to the outside of the door and yelled at us through the door to stop screwing around an unlock the door--because as we know everyone wants to be locked in a large McDonald's restroom-- using of course the lock that was on the outside of the door right in front of her.

Love the smoking horses pic btw! I can't wait until Derek starts seeing cigarette related things (like the smoke clouds in the background of today's panels), returning to board the ship and seeing a carton of cigarettes docked port-side.

Regina Wolfe-Parks said...

Wanders you made me laugh out loud at work. The link made me laugh even louder. Thank goodness, no one is here to see what I'm laughing at.

Talking horses...now I'm thinking of Mr. Ed. Can you imagine if Wilbur had caught him having a cigarette?

With all of this talk of cigarettes, I think Derek (and the horses) should look into Nicoderm CQ or Chantix.

LouiseF said...

Actually, Derek's preoccupation with cigarettes reminds me (painfully) of Dawn Weston and her unending focus on the Guy who Dumped her--Dave. Particularly amusing was her rumination on Dave while on vacation in Italy, looking at the statue of David...Moy's characters often seem to need a support group for people with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD).

Sandi Ego said...

@ Chester The Dog - yes! How can the horses be so perfect and the surf is unfathomably wrong? I love the smoking horses; we once had an ex-racehorse that loved the mares at our barn. We called him The Ladies Gelding and joked that he should wear a smoking jacket and drink cognac.

I can tie this plot into My Real Life; our barn has stand-alone separate bathrooms for the men and women. The women's one has a stubbornly sticky door. I've been trapped in there twice, yelling out the window for help. Both times a fellow boarder had to kick the door in. Lucky they did because, unlike the boat, the group riding lesson would've definitely gone on without me.

r u ok? said...

Pretty soon everything that Derek looks at will be imagined as a lit cigarette - palm tree, lamp post, Katie, . . .

(More smoking horses please!)

KitKat said...

It sure looks like Katie and Derek choose the activities that none of the thousands of other passengers on the cruise choose. Are the rest of them sampling pineapple at the plantation with Mary and Toby?

Regina Wolfe-Parks: Mr. Ed and Wilbur! Get him a sandwich!

KMD said...

Horses talking? What the hell? Did the Mark Trail team take over?

Chester the Dog said...

Why did they have to travel all the way to Jamaica to ride horses? Actually everything these two ding dongs are doing could have been done right at home (seeing a semi-Broadway revue, riding horses, getting locked in a bathroom, nagging about smoking, discuss fish patterns in carpeting).

Chester the Dog said...
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meg said...

Esme lurks in the tropical foliage, pea shooter at the ready. As Katie and Derek ride near her, Esme scores a direct hit on the flank of Katie's horse. The horse lurches forward, and stampedes down the beach. Katie screams, Derek lights a Marlboro, and Mary Worth leaps from the verandah of the plantation house. What happens next?

a. Mary grabs the reins and meddles the horse into submission.
b. Mary breaks her hip and is then trampled by Derek's hoss.

Regina Wolfe-Parks said...

Someone yesterday mentioned (I think it was Dave in Parma) about a horse in a smoking jacket. I looked up on Google "horses smoking cigarettes" and found a horse in a smoking jacket, smoking a cigarette. (Scroll down for the illustration. Unlike my husband, Google never disappoints LOL)

http://www.myersstables.com/php/training.php

Chester the Dog said...

@meg the answer is C, the towel folding demonstration is cancelled for the next day, because the entire ship has come down with pineapple poisoning.

Garnet said...

Horses in every storyline would work. I think Mary would be at home at a boarding stable, as many of them have a resident meddlesome know-it-all. There would be many opportunities for meddling.

I think my poor horse needs a smoke now. He ran through a fence yesterday because the neighbours got a new mare and he really has an eye for the ladies (despite being a gelding). I found him over in the neighbouring pen with a bloody pastern (area above the hoof). I called the vet out and luckily it wasn't a deep wound.

Sandi Ego said...

@ Garnet - sorry about your horse, glad it's not serious. They are spectacularly good at injuring themselves in any way imaginable.