Thursday, March 8, 2012

Mary Worth 1,248

Too many words. I wasn't going to even bother with today's strip because of all the words, but then I spotted that magical phrase #*&^% and my curiosity was up. Mary Worth, once again appealing to our baser instincts.

Today's Full Strip

42 comments:

heydave said...

I forget: Did this all start with
Nola asking for advice?

Oh, I also forget: does Nola get what she wants?

Anonymous said...

I think BaHa may be onto something here [see yesterday's post]. Mary told Nola she unfairly took another man's job, but Nola did not deny that she is a man. Perhaps the advice Nola (real name Nolan) truly needs from Mary is how to proceed with her gender reassignment. And then there's the problem of how to break the news to her boyfriend...

tuffenuf (&$%#@!) said...

Funny how Nola all of a sudden crowbars an obscenity into a conversation with a white-haired hospital volunteer. How crass!

Now, as for the obscenity that was symbol-ed out? I tried them all in the sentence and feel as though the hyphenated one works best... And is the funniest to imagine Nola saying to Mary, who doesn't even flinch at her ultra-coarse slurs.

Anonymous said...

Nola better watch it or Mary will pull out a bar of Lifebouy and clean up that potty mouth.

KitKat said...

I guess Nola's use of an obscenity is Moy's code for "once a guttersnipe, always a guttersnipe." The last Worthiverse character to curse was Wayne the Kidnapper, right?

Notice that the pink draperies have returned while the blinds have disappeared.

Anonymous said...

Mary: "There are other ways to get even with those *#%$&'s. I'll teach you. For example, there's this rich doctor who wants to marry me. I lead him along and then WHAM reject him at his most vulnerable. Then I repeat the process. That way you can not only hurt them, you can torture them for a long, long time. Much more satisfying."

Anonymous said...

4$$#073$!

Rather than a string of symbols, maybe Moy should use some anti-robot words. Today, mine are:

mingivi dickshi

Anonymous said...

I think I've broken the swear word code! Assigning the numbers corresponding to the #*&^% symbols on your keyboard gives you 38765. Make a table of numbers and letters of the alphabet (0 = A, 1 = B, 2 = C, etc.), dropping the first digit after 9. Use the table to determine the possible combinations of letters. Here are the results, with my "most likely" choices in caps: Dnx, Is, Hr, gQ, fpZ. I'll let you finish the rest.

Anonymous said...

Is Mary still giving Nola the benefit of the doubt?

Elaine said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
James in North Dakota said...

Karen Moy seems to be going down the blue path of obscenity. That's twice in one year I've seen punctuation marks used to punch up the conversation! (I believe SpongeBob SquarePants once referred to them as "sentence enhancers.")

Was Mary Worth always this racy? Doesn't she know that children read this? Think of the children!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Aaah! Mary's thumbs are on the wrong sides of her hands! Get her to Hospital, stat! We haven't seen Hospital Hi-Fi in FOREVER.

My non-robot words today are Utiondev Vingtor. I believe this will be the name of the Worthiverse's next arch-villain.

--Beagle Vet

LouiseF said...

Thanks, everyone for your information yesterday about where to find more complete versions of Mary Worth.. .. I was particularly informed by the link provided by Thorpnotized. My next question, where to find Mary Worth online on a Sunday. . . .

tuffenuf said...

LouiseF
Go to Wanders' link to today's panel (through the Washington Post), change the last digits in the link location (bar) to correspond to Sunday's date, press enter:
VOILA!

Hope this helps.

KitKat said...

@ Louise F., I consult the Seattle Post-Intelligencer: http://www.seattlepi.com/comics-and-games/fun/Mary_Worth/

@ Beagle Vet, good call on Mary's thumbs!

tuffenuf said...

Louise - it is more correctly named:
the address bar.

(Couldn't think of what it is called, as I never have to mention it to anyone but myself.) :)

Thorpnotized said...

@ Kitkat: I almost always go to seattlepi.com for the daily color version of the MW strip, especially on Sunday, since my paper only carries two rows of panels. I save the larger version of each strip to my computer by right-clicking on "Zoom", which is at the upper right of the strip, and then choosing the "Save Link As..." option to download it. I keep them in a special folder so I can quickly scroll through them when I need to refer to past strips.

The Athens Banner-Herald website has a similar format:
http://onlineathens.com/comics/?feature_id=Mary_Worth
so I use that one on those nights when I'm up late enough to see what's happening "tomorrow" in MW. The strip changes at exactly midnight, depending on the local time of the newspaper (seattlepi doesn't change until 3 hours later).

P.S. I never knew that "pi" was Post-Intelligencer. Thanks for clearing that up for me.

tuffenuf said...

@Thorpnotized

I also like the Seattle PI link, which allows the panels to be zoomed for easier reading. (this IS Mary Worth, you know...)

The Washington Post does not offer this option, but I wish that it did - makes reading easier.

Vicki said...

Many years ago there was a salty old character...I think his name was Sal or Sid... who was dying, and who would swear a lot in front of Mary Worth.
I recall she scolded him saying, "I'll thank you NOT to use that kind of language in my presence" or some such thing. (WHY I've remembered that all these years I have no idea!?)
Anyway, seems about time for her to pull that line out again, seeing as how these 'youngsters' have such potty mouths these days!
My anti-robot words sound like pretty good insults. Maybe I should commit these to memory, too!
ynaltss nutiod

Sandi Ego said...

"Oilit lyaquire" - sounds like asking for the restroom with a cockney accent.

My wise daughter feels certain that the naughty epithet is "meanies".

meg said...

My word, take a look at the size of Nola's knuckles in Friday's strip. She is pretty intimidating, particularly if you are a woman of Mary's age (131, but who's counting?).

Nola: Put up yer dukes, I'll kill you, I'll kill you a million times.*

Mary: You want a piece of ME? I've beat up punks bigger than you before I've even drunk my Metamucil. They don't call me Mangler Mary for nothing. C'mon, show me what you got.

Nola: Is that you, Mom?

Waiter: Ladies, please take this to the alley.

Mary and Nola simultaneously turn on the waiter and beat him to a bloody pulp. They grin sheepishly at each other, kick over the table, lock arms and exit.

Nola: Mary, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

They exit to the strains, rendered exquisitely by the Luna Strings duo, of As Time Goes By.

*thanks to Milton Berle

KitKat said...

@ Meg at 1:40 p.m., once again you have presented a much more appealing scenario! Kudos to you!

When Nola says, "It will bring me what I want! And it has!" she must not mean lunch. Still no food (or wait staff in sight).

phoebes in santa fe said...

I am really hoping that Nola will tell Mary that she's "after" Dr Jeff and will steal him from Mary, And, ha ha ha, there's nothing you can do to stop me, so there ol' lady!!!

Limber Joe said...

Wanders...as much as I hate to say it...you can check in here once every other week or so. Nothing changes except for the continuity.

heydave said...

I have to admit that I never really pegged Mary for the Zen Master she obviously sees herself.

meg said...

Wanders: Pay no attention to the man known as Limber Joe. This strip is action-packed, and only you are capable of pointing it out to your humble followers.
Meg

Anonymous said...

At least Mary's thumbs have returned to their normal positions today. I was getting the heebie-jeebies.

--Beagle Vet

Sandi Ego said...

Keep on Truckin', Nola.

Vicki said...

so... does anyone know if Nola's boyfriend IS cheating on her? Because Mary and Nola have been at Mr. J's/Luna so long, Boyfriend has probably forgotten her name by now!

Anonymous said...

Are Mary and Nola on some kind of wheeled platform, with Eggo steering them around? The windows have now developed panes and are back to curtains, after having no panes and switching to blinds for awhile, and the background keeps changing.

Between that and Mary's thumbs moving all over her hands, I'm feeling dizzy.

And Nola, news flash: the people who scored you when you were younger DON'T CARE what you've achieved in life. Grow up.

--Beagle Vet

Anonymous said...

Beagle Vet, what do you mean by "people who scored you"? Gave her life background music?

Anonymous said...

Ha! I just reread my post! I meant "scorned". That migraine last night wiped out my proofreading skills for awhile.

Although, given Nola's propensity for certain things, "scored" might be more appropriate, and have more than one meaning.

--Beagle Vet

Anonymous said...

Clocks spring forward tonight almost everywhere in the U.S. But not in the Worthiverse, where time, instead of flying, falls out of the sky, dead, and Mary's lunch with Nola exteeeeeeends to infinity.

--Beagle Vet

Vicki said...

Where.Is.The.Food.

Tony said...

Not so fast, Anonymous! Nola today (Sunday), unable to stand another of Mary's platitudes, abruptly ends the lunch, leaving Mary with nothing to do but touch her face.
And possibly finish Nola's uneaten salad (waste not, want not).

djangosmom said...

they've gone full circle, they're back at Luna's!

Anonymous said...

Hallelujah! The lunch is OVER! And in the last panel, we get Mary with a cross-eyed look, a face-touch, AND a predatory plant right behind her. A Worthiversian Trifecta!

What a GREAT DAY in the Worthiverse.

--Beagle Vet

Anonymous said...

Sunday...thank God this lunch is over.

KitKat said...

Well, the check should be minimal. Other than Mary's recriminations, it doesn't look like they were ever served anything but water.

Goodness, Moy throwing the New Testament at Nola - ! [face touch]

Vicki said...

teeheehee... I'm loving seeing Mary's "advice" thrown back in her face and being so abrubtly dismissed by Nola "that-is-ALL!" Wolvensen! (Mary just doesn't understand Nola and what she's been through!)

@BeagleVet: LOVE "Worthiversian Trifecta!" that's awesome!

Thorpnotized said...

Knowing he would lose an hour due to the time change, Giella saved himself some time by recycling the outdoor setting for Luna from last Sunday.

You have to love the dramatic way Nola throws her tiny napkin onto the table before she storms out. One can only hope this is the end of this story line, with a new one starting tomorrow. But in true Mary Worth fashion, she will most likely be with Toby tomorrow, recounting her disastrous lunch. Not the part about her conversation with Nola, but the dismal service at Luna.

meg said...

Panel 1: Luna restaurant vows to itself that those who laughed at it when it was Mr J's, would be humbled by its glorious reincarnation as LUNA.

Panel 2: Nola places her fingers in position to say: I have ONE MEEELYON DOLLARS!

Panel 3: Thirty year old Nola tells centenarian Mary that Mary, the greatest meddler, busybody and know-it-all of her generation, can not understand nothing. Mary briefly pretends to be humble.

Panels 4, 5, 6: Mary sings that same old song of humility, service to others, wisdom and peace the Mary way (and by the way, Nola, have you read my book, "I'm Wise, But You Suck", as sold on tv and remaindered at convenience stores, bodegas, and flea markets? I thought not.).

Panel 7: Nola complains that a total stranger doesn't understand her.

Panel 8: Nola leaves in a huff, setting a new record for exclamation points in one balloon.

Panel 9: Nola dines and dashes.

Panel 10: When Mary tries to leave without paying, Bill the Manager calls SRPADS (Santa Royale Police and Doughnut Squad).

Panel 11: SRPADS tazes an irate Mary and drag her out as she screeches, "I'll get you for this, NOOOOOOOOLAAAAAAAAAA!"

Note: Panels 9 through 11 are only available in selected areas.