Wednesday, March 18, 2020

Mary Worth 3313

Dining in? In California? I don't think so. When I look at this panel, all I can think of is how many germs are being transmitted.

16 comments:

Anonymous said...


Gotta say, that is some scintillating conversation.

-- Scottie McW.

KitKat said...

Why is Dawn so tired? Attending class and doing assignments shouldn’t be so taxing. Maybe she should seek medical attention. If only she knew someone in the medical field who could direct her...

Judging by other comic strips, I’m guessing that strips are submitted for publication about two weeks ahead of time. If that’s the case, KM should soon be clued in about the current pandemic situation. It’s probably a moot point; we all know that the Worthiverse and Santa Royale exist in the Non-Reality Bubble, where 147-year-old Mary traipses around a hospital, Hugo and friends traipse around Gay Paree, and the Dweeb Couple constantly dines out. Sigh...

Anonymous said...

No napkins available - sorry Chin Napkin Groupie

mr_darcy said...

I think Anonymous hit the mark. In the Worthiverse, the autonomous Chin Napkins prevent the virus from spreading.

Chin Napkin Groupie said...

For some sad reason, Chin Napkin has been blacklisted. Maybe it was something he said in this politically correct world. In any case, I shall continue to hold him close to my heart. How I miss Uncle Joe.

Anonymous said...

I think that the secret antidote to the coronavirus lies within Mary. Someone needs to hold her down and take a blood sample so that production can start immediately. I mean, the woman is 147 years old! She's lived through the 1918 flu and who knows what else so it couldn't hurt to try!

HelenClark


Michael Beaumier said...

Look at these two selfish Millennials — wallowing in their disease, flaunting their youth and pink, fresh lungs. They will kill us all!

Sue said...

Dawn is not tired. Dawn is DUMB!

Anonymous said...

At first I thought Dawn was drinking from a sippy cup. Then I realized that she's stupidly and needlessly using a plastic straw. Obviously, she's not majoring in environmental studies.

Anonymous said...


THURSDAY

Here we have another example of cognitive dissonance (or whatever the correct term is) between Karen and June. The words indicate that Dawn is eager to wipe the goop off Jared's face, but the illustration indicates that she's a little grossed out by it.

-- Scottie McW.

KitKat said...

THURSDAY
It's a triumphant return by Chin Napkin! Hurrah!

I wonder why Jared is eating a Pop Tart for dinner. Is that a trendy California thing?

Who other than Jared says "It figures" when told about dribbled food on a chin? What a schlemiel.



Anonymous said...

THURSDAY

Wouldn't a more typical response from a "friend" be:

Jared: Where, here?

Dawn: No, the other side, you dope.

HelenClark

meg said...

Chin Napkin goes to confession.

“Bless me Father, for I have been a slacker. It has been 1 year and 21 days since I last made confession.

Shortly after that I found work in Estelle’s hand while she ate a single slice of cheese pizza. It was a humble job, and I did my best.

But I experienced the sin of covetousness when I saw that the other napkin at the table had been assigned the epic duty of servicing the chin of Mr. Supersized Crying Bigamist who had an entire pepperoni pizza with extra sauce to dribble on his chin and shirtfront.

I LUSTED for that assignment! I could have swabbed the very hell off that slob’s mammoth mandible! But no! That other napkin totally failed to take on the heroic task he-or she- was challenged with! The last thing I remember was falling in a crumpled and very nearly grease-free wad onto the (disgusting) carpet.

Since that night, I have not looked for work, nor have I prepared for work by being prespotted, laundered, starched and pressed. I spend my days resenting Mr. Extra Large Extra Snowy Extra Lazy Dinner Napkin for the job he stole from me! I coulda been a contender in the “It Takes Shout to Get it Out!” commercial audition! I spend my nights soaking up wine on the floor of a wine cave in Goleta...
Help me, Father! I need work, real work, substantial work...”

“All right, son, say three Hail Mary Worths, and three Our Fathers. Then go see the kitchen nuns; they’ll dry you out and clean you up, and they already have a job lined up for you. Tonight, you’ll serve here at the rectory, and....you will wipe lasagna from the Bishop’s sizable chin!”

Exit Chin Napkin, pew left.

(The evening was not an unqualified success. Chinny did mop the mouth of the surprisingly slovenly Bishop. But to his chagrin, Father Sarducci’s dining assistant turned out to be Chinny’s great rival, Big Snowy Lazy Dinner Napkin! And Father Sarducci tipsily overturned a half bottle of Chianti Classico... Poor Chinny is currently undergoing a 90 day program at the Blotty Ford Center.)

KitKat said...

@meg, I’m awestruck that KM’s pedestrian plotting inspires you to such heights. You certainly made the most of the reemergence of Chin Napkin. I picture Sidney Greenstreet as the Bishop.

meg said...

KitKat: Thank you, but those are just the product of an idle and silly mind! I picture Don Novello as Father Sarducci.

LouiseF said...

meg, thank you again for getting me laughing in this time of Plague! Now I think I'll go pull out all my cloth napkins and sort them while I self-isolate. All the best, everyone!