Friday, November 30, 2012

Mary Worth 1,468

Dawn, this is the exact opposite of Dr. Freud-Jung's advice yesterday! If you love someone, you will break down their walls, pound them down relentlessly until you've exposed the weak, whimpering, isolated being inside. That's love, Dawn. That's love... I mean friendship.

Today's Full Strip

Thursday, November 29, 2012

Mary Worth 1,467

I'm totally late for work this morning, but I have to take time to blog because today is one of the most momentous and historically significant events ever in this comic strip: Dawn attends an actual class!

After years of claiming to attend Local U, we finally have the proof. A class. A psychology class. Which we didn't need our narrator to point out for us, given the psych lingo on the white board, and that vest.

She's studying psychology, which explains how adept she is at interacting with Jim. And after reading panel 2, I think we can look forward to a lot more stalking on Dawn's part. Thanks, professor!

Today's Full Strip

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Mary Worth 1,466

Okay, now she is just toying with us.

Poor Jim.

Does Local University offer a class in Basic Human Interaction?

Dawn. When a guy tells a woman that he wants to be more than friends, it means he doesn't want to be just friends! Get it? It's pretty simple.

When a woman tells that guy she just wants to be friends, and then sends him text messages, emails, and voice messages to the same point, it means that the guy dodged a bullet.

Today's Full Strip

Monday, November 26, 2012

Mary Worth 1,465

Dawn has become the anti-stalker. While Jim has no doubt moved on, Dawn continues to insist that she doesn't want to be more than a friend. That girl is NUTZ!

Today's Full Strip

Thursday, November 22, 2012

Mary Worth 1,464

"I'm sorry to hear that Dawn. Jim has so little to be thankful for this Thanksgiving. It's cruel of you not to get involved romantically."

Today's Full Strip

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Mary Worth 1,463

Whereas you go to the pier to unwind from whatfore? Studying? The stress of volunteer eating at the cafeteria? Shopping for purple pantsuits? Chatting online with friends? I can't remember any element of Dawn's routine that would require unwinding at a pier. But it's okay because I can only remember Dawn unwinding at the pier once (to unwind from her near-death experience aboard an Italian cruise liner. Okay.) Maybe by nearly every day she means 'one time.'

Today's Full Strip 

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Mary Worth 1,462

I seem to remember this same conversation taking place the week of Halloween. This Thanksgiving, I will be Thankful that we got to relive this delightful discussion between Mary and Dawn.

I have just one Christmas wish...

Today's Full Strip 

Monday, November 19, 2012

Mary Worth 1,461

That plate would be perfect for Jim! It comes with its own hand to feed you pie!

Today's Full Strip 

Sunday, November 18, 2012

Mary Worth 1,460

Dawn leaves the classic "just friends" voice mail. Some real zingers. "You're an amazing guy..." "Why mess with a good thing?" "It's not you, it's me..." and, of course, the almost clich├ęd, "This has nothing to do with your missing arm..."

All of this would be cruel enough, but she leaves it on Jim's voice mail. I guess this is how the story ends because one thing I can absolutely guarantee: Jim is as gone as his left arm. We will never hear from that guy again.

Today's Full Strip 

Saturday, November 17, 2012

Mary Worth 1,459

These were my exact words as I dragged myself out of bed this morning to write this post!

This story is now six months long, but Karen Moy will never break me. Never!

Today's Full Strip   

Friday, November 16, 2012

Mary Worth 1,458

Did Humphrey Bogart teach you nothing, Jim? Never beg. Never whine. And never, ever squish your sippy cup!

Today's Full Strip   

Thursday, November 15, 2012

Mary Worth 1,457

It's generally hard to take an enraged suitor seriously when he's holding a sippy cup.

Today's Full Strip   

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Mary Worth 1,456

All week, I have regretted that I was unable to post on Monday's strip, which I think was one of my favorites all year. Here it is in its entirety:

Is it any wonder where Karen Moy gets her inspiration?

Just compare the diologue in this scene from the timeless "Casablanca," with this diaologue from today's unfettered-by-the-restraints-of-time "Mary Worth."

And things have been the same for quite some time now.

Today's Full Strip   

Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Saturday, November 10, 2012

Mary Worth 1,454

Chin Napkin! Just when you thought this story couldn't get any better, look who shows up! Chin Napkin!

Today's Full Strip 

Friday, November 9, 2012

Mary Worth 1,453

Oh, I don't know. I could think of a few scenarios. But I can't write about it now because my daughter is screaming at me that I need to take her to school so she can explore herself and see her friends.

Thursday, November 8, 2012

Mary Worth 1,452

I may be overly optimistic, but I think we just finished the story. No, hear me out. This story started (last May) with Dawn pining away over Dave, who had dumped her for his old girlfriend. After a series of harrowing, and perspective-changing events, Dawn has come full circle, where she's not going to take anything seriously until she's explored everything. That's an awesome life plan for a woman whose been able to convince everyone that she's a teenager for the last nine years of college. And I think it's the perfect resolution to what has been an amazing tale of transformation.

Now can we please learn about identity theft again?

Today's Full Strip 

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Mary Worth 1,451

By all means, Wilbur, shove your plate aside and eat right out of the casserole dish. After all, you do love food.

Today's Full Strip 

Monday, November 5, 2012

Mary Worth 1,450

Three strips of bacon and a plate of bleached cold cuts? And we all know that Mary Worth did most of the cooking herself. Who has a neighbor help cook the dinner, but doesn't invite her to stay?

Today's Full Strip 

Sunday, November 4, 2012

Friday, November 2, 2012

Mary Worth 1,448

Don't worry about Jim. It's perfectly natural to be attracted to someone who looks exactly like your sister.

It's also perfectly natural to confuse the characters in Mary Worth with humans. It's an easy mistake to make.

Oh, wait a minute. No, I'm wrong on both counts.

Today's Full Strip 

Thursday, November 1, 2012

Mary Worth 1,447

You know, Dawn, that's exactly what Dave said about you, and look where you ended up... days on the couch watching Game of Thrones, then a sinking ship in the middle of the ocean. And Jim is afraid of boats right now, so this might not be the best plan.

Today's Full Strip