Mary Worth 2578

 

Did I ever tell you about the time I saw Anything Goes? I had a business trip scheduled to New York City that I had to reschedule because of a funeral. I mistakenly scheduled it for my youngest daughter's twelfth birthday. When I realized my stupid mistake, I called my NYC colleague who suggested that I bring her with me and stay at his place. I had also bought a ticket to see Anything Goes on the original trip. The theatre had a really strict no exchanges policy, but when I called and asked if I could change the date and buy three tickets instead of one, the lady said, "I have three together on the front row side or front row center."  I said, "Center."  

The show starred Sutton Foster (goddess) and Joel Grey (legend). And when Ms. Foster opened with "I Get a Kick Out of You," my long time crush was instantly rekindled. Our daughter sat there with a stuffed animal on her lap, and at the curtain call, when Mr. Grey winked at her, I became a complete fangirl, and couldn't stop fangirling. 

Mary Worth 2577

 

I'm glad Entertainer Esmeralda put on the dress from her opening number after the curtain call. It looks much more comfortable. 

Enjoy: 14
Good:13
Love: 11
Nice: 5 

As some of you might guess, I'm traveling which means spotty formatting and iffy secret messages. But, this:

 

Mary Worth 2576

 

And looking more and more attractive every time she opens her mouth. "Yes, honey, you're an amazing performer as well."

Enjoy: 13
Good:13
Love: 11
Nice: 5 

Mary Worth 2575

Entertainer Esme gets more standing ovation than anyone.

Mary Worth 2574

I have to say, Entertainer Esme, with her line of chorus boys in taped-on stovepipe hats, is one of the best things to hit this strip in a long time. But, Derek, let me warn you about falling for a stage performer. On stage, sure, she's sexy and smiling and oh so into you. But three weeks into the relationship you're going to start to learn some things. Either 1) she's so ambitious for public affection that she has no idea how to sustain an intimate relationship, or 2) her craft is merely compensation for massive insecurity, and she may even begin to doubt that you love her more than your wife.

Derek, if you want to upset Katie, stick with cigarettes. Much less complicated.

Mary Worth 2573

Oh, I do hope we get to hear Ginger (Trademark Sandi Ego) sing the entire song. First performer, first verse, and the audience is literally stunned. By the end of the show, the audience will be nothing more than a gelatinous blob dripping under their seats.

Citizens of Santa Royale, please complete this lyric: "Life is like..."

Mary Worth 2672

So, "Good" has passed "Love" with a double appearance today! "Looking forward" didn't qualify for this competition, but it's kind of a shame because it keeps showing up, and I'm starting to feel bad for it.

Enjoy: 13
Good:12
Love: 11
Nice: 5

This show makes me miss my daughter who is graduating from BYU next week. I'll pick her up and drive with her across the country back home to New Jersey. I'm looking forward to it. Ladies and gentlemen, Maggie Andersen:

Mary Worth 2571

The Activities Guide says this is a variety of acts, and given that Mary spent a lot of time watching Ziegfeld's Follies on the Great White Way, she knows when a variety show is Broadway quality.

Enjoy: 13
Love: 11
Good:10
Nice: 5

Mary Worth 2570

Later? If you don't hurry now, you won't have good seats for tonight's musical production of "Titanic!"

For those keeping score (and I am):

Enjoy: 13
Love: 10
Good:9
Nice: 5

And if you're looking forward to the Titanic musical, here's a preview:

Mary Worth 2569

 

I'm not sure what I was thinking, but I've tried to make a collection of the descriptive words in this story so far. I'll leave the interpretation up to you. Enjoy!

Traveling: Love

Cruises: Enjoyed

Travel: Fun

Cruises: Enjoy

Amenities: Love

Food: And the... !

Cooking: Love

Deal: Good

Spread: Delicious

Cooking: Better

Cruise: Enjoy

Deal: Good

Deal: Great

Trip: Enjoy

Cruises: Love

See: Easy

Food: And the... !

Trip: Enjoy

Seattle: Beautiful

Fly: Good

Walks: Beautiful

Classes: Fun

Entertainment: Galore

Food: Endless

Ports: Several

Time: Great

Time: Enjoy

Smoke: Dying

Promises: Good

Ship: Big

Cruise: Treat

Hints: Helpful

Hints: Helpful

Ship: Big

Cruise: Enjoy

People: Friendly

Idea: Good

Dining: Crowded

Seats: Glad

Luggage: Good

Friend: Dear

Room: Nice

Outside: Exciting

Feel: Fortunate

View: Beautiful

Cruise: Memorable

Anywhere: Memorable

This: Beautiful

You: Beautiful

Smoke: Hate

You: Worth

Marriage: Worth

Today: Enjoy

Shapes: Interesting

Sea: Love

YMCA: Fun

Break: Short

Chairs: Inviting

Air: Love

Air: Refreshing

Yourselves: Enjoying

Walk: Enjoying

Activities: Worth

To do: Plenty

Class: Early

Dinner: Formal

Excuse: Love

Entertainment: Good

Shows: Worth

Tonight: Enjoy

Entertainment: Enjoyed

Dinner: Fun

Demonstration: Nice

Walk: Nice

Couple: Nice

Love: Young

Love: Real

Dining: Grand

Buffet: Love

Eating: Casual

Evening: Good

Lobster: Good

You: Nice

Dinner: Enjoy

Mary Worth 2568

Good save, Mary. For a moment, I thought you were criticizing the buffet. Do you ever get the feeling that this is just some tax write-off for Karen Moy's last vacation?

Mary Worth 2567

This! This is why! This is why Karen Moy deserves a Pulitzer Prize or something. Instead of being boxed in by established literary conventions and showing us the towel folding demonstration, she uses beautiful descriptive language ("very nice!") to paint a picture, allowing us to visualize the towel folding demonstration ourselves! After eight days of build up, I never expected to be so not disappointed! Maybe next week someone can describe the formal dress up dinner (very nice!).

Mary Worth 2566

I'm starting to suspect that neither of them have ever been on a cruise before -- excuse me, cruised before -- but they don't want to appear out of it, so they each memorized travel brochures to appear knowledgeable. It's constant pressure to continuously reinforce their previously unknown passion for cruising. Hopefully a delightful evening of tapping their toes to "Nostradamus!" will help them relax.

Mary Worth 2565

It's about time we discussed the entertainment. There shall be acrobats!

Mary Worth 2564

Events Guide
Bargain Cruise Lines

7:00 Bed Making Demonstration
8:00 Towel Folding
9:00 Dish Washing
11:00 Bag Lunch Packing
12:00 Vacuuming
2:00 Dancing by the Pool with the Polaris Pressure Pool Cleaner Line
3:00 Deck Swabbing
4:00 Dinner Preparation
8:00 Dish Washing II
10:00 Watching for Icebergs

Mary Worth 2563

"You remind me of my mother. She folds towels, too. Enjoy the rest of your cruise."

Mary Worth 2562

Holy camoly, Katie darling. If you're going to accuse Derek of wanting to smoke every time he sees someone taking a puff, maybe you ought to avoid taking walks through the designated smoking section.

Mary Worth 2561

The ship's rail also looks inviting... to a two year old.

Mary Worth 2560

Many of you will probably think I should add YMCA by the Village People to the Charterstone Jukebox, but here's the thing: I actually listen to the Charterstone Jukebox. A lot. And there's no way I will ever put YMCA on the Jukebox. So stop your begging.

Mary Worth 2559

Sunday:

Well, I hope you enjoyed yesterday... because this is what tomorrow brought:

Mary Worth 2558

While I expected the room to be smaller, I am quite satisfied to see that their legs will hang over the foot of the bed.

Mary Worth 2557

Trust me. This story ends with Toby hiding out in the Hoosiers apartment, chain smoking Pall Malls.

Mary Worth 2556

I've learned another thing about cruising. No plates. Just plop the pie right on the tray. Every day, this strip makes me want to cruise more and more. I'm even using the verb form now.

Mary Worth 2555

I am learning so much about cruising! Fish carpets. Key cards. Who knew? I'll let you know when it starts to sound interesting.

Mary Worth 2554

"My mother is old and friendly, too. And she didn't object to your being a smoker of indeterminate race and no visible sign of an Adam's apple."

Mary Worth 2553

This helpful orientation tip is brought to you by Norwegian Cruise Lines because, according to my Google research, it's the only cruise line that does this. Sadly, the ship they're boarding appears to be a piece of junk compared to the jewels that make up the NCL fleet.

Mary Worth 2552

This is either or horrible pick-up line, or another example of Robo-tron2000™ automated dialog output.

I just have trouble with people using the noun cruise as a verb. Do people really talk like that? I've only heard people say, "We're going on a cruise." Not, "We're going cruising," unless they're going to be driving back and forth on McHenry Avenue listening to Wolfman Jack on AM radio.