Monday, September 17, 2018

Mary Worth 2973

Mary begins to comprehend that she may have been responsible for Bella's early demise.

29 comments:

Garnet said...

Given the look on her face, she looks like she's planning to off Mr Wynter with that salmon as well.

fauxprof said...

Has Mary’s culinary repertoire devolved to just salmon and muffins? (I almost typed “salmon muffins”, but nobody wants to go there.) What happened to her other famous dishes, like vegetable terrine? Has she completely abandoned Kelk and Splak? Whence the good old days of generic Casserole, and unidentified glop-on-a-plate? I got my start here commenting on the awesome (and awful) variety of the Worthian recipe book, especially as rendered by Uncle Joe, and I miss those days.

By the way, I don’t buy canned salmon, but doesn’t it come packaged like tuna fish, and not tomatoes?

KitKat said...

It’s a known fact that canned salmon was Lucretia Borgia’s go-to poison.

After reading yesterday’s comments about Mary subjecting those flowers to her enhanced interrogation methods, it occurred to me that the plants may be plastic. So, rather than injuring or even killing them, Mary may just be washing the dust and soot off them. I can’t explain her magic watering can, though.

Nance said...

Today's Boldface Haiku is titled

"Meditations On A Can Of Salmon".

Lose dear.
Coping.
Hmmm.

MDMaryTed said...

I have seen in my grocery store salmon in a can the size of canned tomatoes. To me it just screams DON'T BUY!!!

KitKat said...

@fauxprof at 9 a.m., salmon also comes in somewhat larger cans, about 7.5 oz or so. The can Mary’s holding looks larger than that. From Freda’s or Food Team? I figure Mary dropped Aileen’s because of the muffin debacle. And, wouldn’t salmon remind Mr. Wynter of one of the late Bella’s last meals? Splak/kelk lasagna might be a better choice.

Anonymous said...


Mary checks the expiration date on the cans of salmon given to her by Tommy, who stole a whole case from Frieda's. It says, 4/17/15.

BTW, Mary uses CANNED salmon, not salmon freshly caught and flown in from Seattle? What a fraud she is.

-- Scottie McW.

Regina Wolfe-Parks said...

I rarely eat salmon because it can go terribly wrong in the hands of people who can't cook it correctly. Mary is one of them.

Not content in killing Mr. Wynter's dog, she's going to kill him with her poisonous cooking.

I googled "Can dogs eat salmon?" The answer is yes, but it must be cooked to avoid illness. My guess is Mary put raw salmon on Fitz crackers )because KM can't use "Ritz") and called them "salmon treats."

I am hoping that Mr. Wynter makes the connection when Mary comes by with a "condolence" offering and slaps a lawsuit on her. My ultimate wish would be that Judge Judy would hear the case and yell at Mary for poisoning innocent dogs. (Judge Judy is a big dog lover.) That's way too interesting for KM. She will have Mary spouting platitudes and pushing salon treats.

Anonymous said...

Mary's thrilled that she's finally found a use for the life-size Chihuahua cake mold she picked up at a tag sale 10 years ago. She's now wondering if the 6 family-size cans of salmon will be enough to fill the mold. Mr. Wynter will be so pleased.

doug said...

@Scotty, I was also surprised that Mary doesn't use fresh product for her Salmon squares. Next thing you know we'll see Mary whack a roll of Pillsbury crescent rolls on the edge of the counter!

LouiseF said...

Great comments today!! And thank you to June B for giving us that Warhol-esque illustration of Mary contemplating her canned salmon! Surely a candidate for Panel of the Year. Almost made it worth getting up for on a Monday...

Yahoonski said...

First, I agree this panel would look great on a t-shirt and it should definitely be in the running for panel of the year. June has deftly captured Mary's slightly sidelong glance indicating that she's thinking deep thoughts.

Now, as for salmon, I find it easy to cook, whether canned or fresh. The cans are generally 14oz (like the one June has depicted), and I add chopped scallions, celery and red pepper along with some seasoned breadcrumbs and a little lemon juice, mash it up (skin, bones, et al) and shape it into burgers which I broil. These are tasty on their own or with some kind of white sauce, such as creamy alfredo.

As for the fresh filets, my wife finally convinced me that it's not a sin to microwave them, especially as it takes the guesswork out of the timing. I put the slab skin-side down in one of those shallow Corningware dishes with the clear glass covers. Drizzle a little cooking sherry and lemon juice on it, sprinkle with breadcrumbs, and cook for 4 minutes. Take it out, slice it in half lengthwise, flip them so the inside edges are on the outside, and cook for 4 more minutes. Perfecto! Always good. And if I can do it, anybody can. Just don't let your chihuahua anywhere near the stuff. It'll kill him dead.

Tim said...

Mary is supposed to be the Queen of the kitchen but all she ever makes are boring muffins and even more boring salmon snacks. She did make that standing rib roast but it led to lechery so I doubt we'll see that again.

Anonymous said...

Okay, I am so done with this story. No one ever dies in Mary Worth, so why kill the poor dog ? I find it sad to look at poor Mr. Wynter weeping enormous tears. If you have to kill off someone, kill someone I won't feel bad about. Please, there are so many to choose from, starting with Toby, and including Dawn, Tommy (drug overdose), Ian, Olive, or my first choice, Wilbur, via the Mama Cass Elliot route.

Anonymous said...

Hmmmmm.....Mary realizes she's used a can of salmonella....

Sandi Ego said...

My Chihuahua/Corgi mix is on a special diet and I give him freshly grilled salmon. Not canned salmon. It may be the easiest fish to cook, I can't imagine buying canned. Anyway, fresh salmon is nutritious for my little dog. Mary's canned salmon... hmmm.

Wanders said...

Just because it came up, here is a list of people who have died in Mary Worth since I started blogging.

Tommy's dad
Dr. Kapuht's patient
Eleanor Dill
Jim's sister Merry
Gina the waitress's Mama
Lonnie Robert's cousin Richie
Lonnie Roberts
Scott Hewlett's partner, Officer Millet
Lynn Griffin's boyfriend, Greg
Donna Amalfi
and of course, Aldo Kelrast

Wanders said...

Oh, and I think Wilbur's old girlfriend... Can't remember her name.

Regina Wolfe-Parks said...

Thanks Wanders for looking this up..I had completely forgotten about these people. Ah yes, Wilbur's old GF, whose son thought Wilbur was his dad. She probably died of shame from being with Wilbur.

I agree with @anonymous 11:38, we really need to kill of some of the despised "regulars". Wilbur is also #1 on my list, with Chinbeard coming a close second. They are the two most repugnant characters.

Tim said...

I can't stand this story arc. That stupid week long conversation between sensitive Mary and callous Toby was unbearable. I still think it will lead to Mary sued for killing Bella with her poisonous salmon snacks. I would like that.

Carlye said...

If Mary makes up some more salmon snacks to take as consolation to Old Man Wynter, (which would be the worst idea ever) I can't wait until he throws them at her. "Your horrible salmon kibbles killed my beloved Bella! Why are you torturing me with those vile things?"

Tim said...

After my wife died a lot of people provided comfort food. They usually asked what they could bring. Just saying.

lmjb1964 said...

Are you people trying to get me fired? I was sitting at my desk with my hand clapped over my mouth trying not to laugh out loud at your comments while I'm supposed to be working. Wander's comments, Yahoonski's comment about waterboarding the plants, the discussion of Mary;s magical watering can, and Nance's perfect BFH title--you guys are killing me! Much like the salmon squares did poor Bella. What can Mary be thinking? She's not planning to take salmon squares to Old Man Wynter, is she? That would be such a cruel reminder. Ooh, maybe she's as sick of Toby's awfulness as we are, and is thinking, "Hm, I think it's time to make Toby a 'special' batch of salmon squares."

KitKat said...

Wanders, thanks for providing the list of the non-dearly departed. I had forgotten (or never knew about) a couple of them. This also reminded me of Kurt, Wilbur's not-son, who incited Dawn's nascent sibling rivalry.

When Mary says in today's p. 1 "I know what it's like to lose someone dear," could she possibly mean Dear Jack, who died ages ago? Would she put a deceased spouse on par with a deceased chihuahua? Or will she pull out a deceased pet tale of her own? BTW, I'm beginning to wonder if Mr. Wynter's given name is "Mister."

Chester the Dog said...

There is such a thing as salmon dog food (homemade).

http://dogsaholic.com/food_treats/homemade-dog-food-recipes.html

Anonymous said...


Wait a minute! That's it! Anon at 11:47 figured it out. Salmon plus Bella minus B equals Salmonella!

Now all we have to do is figure out what the "minus B" signifies.

Moy is sending out a secret message. She's toying with us.

-- S. McW.

tkraft said...

Scottie, I agree! But I think these cans go back a bit more. I got my magnifying glass out for Panel #2 today and guess what I saw? Yep, an 8 and 2. From a 1982 NY Times edition:
"The Government today expanded its recall of canned Alaskan salmon. The recall now covers eight packing plants and more than 50 million cans that may have defects that can trigger a growth of botulinum toxins." Understandable, though. Mary was a bit of a survivalist at that time and was worried about the Falklands War and Carlos the Jackal. Guessing. Either that or the price per can was good and she really stocked up.

Sharon said...

@S. McW. at 5:31 PM: Toby minus B = Toy. As a secret message contender, that works for me.

Maxwell Bacon said...

I think Mary is the one who'll get the epiphany in this "plot." She'll bring a plate of salmon snacks to Mr. Wynter, and he'll point out that Bella died of salmonella poisoning after the pool party. He'll give Mary a huge piece of his mind, and she'll come to the realization that she shouldn't meddle anymore in anyone's life at Charterstone. End of strip. Beginning of the new strip, "DAWN WESTON." YESSSSSS!!!!