Wednesday, September 19, 2018

Mary Worth 2975

"Myster Wynter, I can bring Bella back... All I will need is a patch of her fur, some black chalk, and a strong electric current. Oh, and your immortal soul. Would that be acceptable to you?"

20 comments:

Nance said...

Today's Boldface Haiku is titled

"Bowed By Grief, Bonded By Salmon".

Oh, delicious!
Liked.
Bella's share. Salmon...
Sorry loss...

Christine Lehman said...

Yikes -- those salmon squares are looking more sinister by the day!! Poor li'l Bella never knew what hit her! (Hmm, maybe this is Mary's weird way of helping Mr. Wynter "get over his grief" -- by helping him "get over" to the other side?!)

Anonymous said...


Are we to believe that Old Man Wynter hasn't put 2 and 2 together yet? Or is the sly dog setting a trap? I suspect we will all be very disappointed if it's the former.

-- Scottie McW.

TimP said...

If Mary put that meathook of a left hand on my shoulder you better believe I would be making with the nice talk. Heck, I'd even eat a salmon square right in front of her if I thought it would get her out of the door.

KitKat said...

I recall Mr. Wynter feeding salmon snacks to Bella, not eating them himself. As @Scottie McW. noted, we had much higher hopes for Wynter. If this isn't an elaborate plot by Wynter to exact revenge against Mary, a la "Come into my parlor, said the spider to the fly," our high hoes will be dashed.

In the "Positively Mary!" interview cited yesterday, KM said she writes three or four stories a year, so I doubt this salmon snacks snoozer will conclude this week with Mary offering condolences and possible food poisoning. Are we in for a flashback of Mary and a deceased beloved pet?

BTW, while scanning a coupon insert this week, I see that Purina sells food for small dogs called "Bella." With KM, that's probably not a coincidence.

fauxprof said...

Mary’s usual meddling tactic begins with questionable food, and goes on to questionable matchmaking. Her ulterior motive is to get Wynter paired off with some unsuspecting geriatric lady over at Blissful Acres (or whatever Hannah Dingdon’s retirement home is called). That way, Wynter is conveniently out of the picture and his apartment can be rented at a much higher rate to a more congenial tenant. No chihuahuas.

Yahoonski said...

Good one, TimP! "Mary's Meathooks" has a nice ring to it. Seems cruel for her to be laying them on the poor Hunchback of Charterstone, though. Isn't the beaten down enough yet?

Yahoonski said...

Oops. I mean "Isn't HE beaten down enough yet?"

Hey, did anybody try my recipe for canned salmon burgers yet? I was serious about them being quite good, but I can't imagine there's anything I could do with the stuff that would make it palatable served cold on a cracker. Yeesh.

Anonymous said...

And once again, Moy proves that a bad story can indeed be made worse. Good going, Moy, good going.

Anonymous said...

Sorry, Yahoonski, but having spent a lot of time in Anchorage and then on Kodiak Island where I could literally walk to a stream in back of the house to net a fresh salmon, there's no way... just no way...

Anonymous said...

The only time I eat salmon is either smoked on my bagel or as a salmon pie on Fridays during Lent.

r u ok? said...

I just don't see how Mary doesn't completely break down Myster Wynter and then remold him in her Charterstone meddling boot camp after he essentially said that her salmon snacks recipe made pretty good dog food.

Sandi Ego said...

Has Karen Moy done an animal shelter story? Because it feels like that's where this whole mess is headed.
Either Myster Wynter adopts an adorable mutt or he volunteers at the shelter and meets a charming widow who also volunteers and is totally into salmon.

LouiseF said...

At least Mary's memory is good enough to not have offered her famous muffins to M. Wynter. She is still smarting from his muffin rejection at the pool party. I suspect those salmon squares may harbor a hidden blueberry or two in retaliation... SandiEgo, I am with you on the animal shelter plot prediction. Improbable as this whole story line is, the animal shelter direction would hit exactly the tone deaf note that KM has become so identified with in my mind.

LouiseF said...

And, Yahoonski, I DO often make salmon "croquettes" as they are unfortunately called in "The Joy of Cooking", but I will definitely try your addition of celery, red pepper, and lemon juice. Thanks!

Regina Wolfe-Parks said...

Yahoonski, would love to try your recipe, but I have a fish hating heathen in my house (my husband, that is.) I ask him how can he live in Maine and not enjoy seafood?

When I lived in NY, I use to go to Costco and they had these stuffed Salmon filets that were to die for. That and their shrimp salad. I will dance in the streets if they ever put a Costco up here.

Anyway, back to Myster Wynter. I can see Mary's easing her way into his apartment. I hope that Myster Wynter has a moment of clarity and remembers that the last thing Bella yacked up with those salmon treats (or what we call them "pink glob on triscuits") and hits Mary in the face with them a la the Three Stooges.

Anonymous said...


My one brush with salmon (croquets) came in an Army mess hall. Haven't gone near the stuff since.

-- S. McW.

mrvy said...

Regina, I have never seen stuffed salmon fillets in a Maryland or Washington, DC, Costco. Let the search commence! Yahoonski, I have had Costco salmon burgers. I'll have to try your recipe for comparison. I have to give KM credit for encouraging us to broaden our culinary horizons, or at least talking about it. But at this point I'd be terrified to let our Bella (hound/setter mix, i.e. mutt) anywhere near salmon. Again, thanks to KM.

TimP said...

Thanks, Yahoonski!

I one time bought a two pack of canned salmon at the local warehouse store. With one can, I made this roasted sweet potato with canned salmon kinda stuffing it recipe. It turned out pretty tasty but I don't think I'd ever make it again. To that point, the other can I donated to a food drive at my kid's school.

Of all the ways to prepare salmon that I've experienced, canned is probably fourth or fifth on the list. I might be talked into those burgers though...

Chester the Dog said...

HUGE pictures of the dog! Whoa!