Tuesday, December 17, 2019

Mary Worth 3252

"I've got just the thing to cheer you up. How about a big steamy bowl of manure? Because seriously, you've earned it."

17 comments:

Anonymous said...

Is there a category at the Worthy Awards for the most revolting panel of the year?

HelenClark

MDMaryTed said...

Oh my, Mary's first sojourn away from making muffins wasn't a great success. Um, Mary? You have to take the fruitcake out of the pan before you serve it. And of course Mary would serve fruitcake. I also was wondering what the heck that bowl of eggs was doing on top of the stove and then I noticed that there are no burners on the stove. Does KM have a kitchen?

KitKat said...

Oh no, it's Mary's Bizarre Baking School, featuring a "fruitcake" that looks like material to patch potholes, a big bowl 'o eggs (why?), and potholders afflicted with a rash. Only Mary would wrestle a steaming object out of a pan, hack off a slice, and toss it at a victim. Estelle, skip Mary's fruitcake and grab the brandy bottle and a glass. If you eat a slice of that monstrosity you'll have more than the blues.

BTW, I realize holiday fruitcakes are often derided, but I appreciate well-made ones (they're not cheap, folks, but they're worth it). Mr. KitKat and I are anticipating the arrival of our traditional fruitcake baked by the Monks of Gethsemane Abbey in Kentucky. Unlike Mary, those monks know how to bake.

fauxprof said...

I’ve never baked a fruitcake, but last weekend my local PBS station ran a marathon of Great British Baking Show Christmas episodes, and fruitcake featured prominently. My takeaway, in relation to today’s strip, is that you don’t bake fruitcake in a Bundt pan, nor do you serve it hot. Not that I’d eat anything that comes out of Mary’s kitchen. She’s Mary Worth, not Mary Berry.

Regina Wolfe-Parks said...

Everyone has said what I've been thinking. My first thought is what the #@$% is that steaming monstrosity?" I thought it was something out of Libby's litter box. I'm dying to see what this glop looks like on a plate. Giving Estelle some fruitcake is apropo because she IS a a fruitcake.

Wanders, since Estelle is so "blue" how about "Blue Christmas" by Elvis in the Charterstone jukebox?

Anonymous said...


"You have the blues? Here, eat some of this. You'll forget all about your blues."

@Regina W-P. I prefer Porky Pig's rendition of Blue Christmas.

-- Scottie McW.

Nance said...

Today's Boldface Haiku is titled

"Fake It Til You Cake It".

Are?
Blues.
Just cheer! Fruitcake?
Sure.

Yahoonski said...

The only person left in this strip for whom I have anything other than contempt is Tommy.

Chester the Dog said...

What do the notes on Mary's fridge door say? Enter at your own risk? Danger?

TimP said...

The non-euclidean perspective of panel one really sets up the Lovecraftian horror that is Mary's fruitcake.

Leaving that aside, I join others in wondering why Estelle would go back to Mary after she set her up with Wilbur.

Moss_Moses said...

"Why Estelle would go back to Mary after she set her up with Wilbur."

Estelle is pining for her karaoke partner Wilbur who is swearing to quit drinking in a bar.

That fruitcake should have some little fruit flies flying around it.

LouiseF said...

For some REAL fruitcake appreciation, watch "Christmas at PeeWee's Playhouse". Mary doesn't know thing one about fruitcake. Perfect BFH title, Nance!

LouiseF said...

Scottie McW, Porky's "Blue Christmas" is priceless!

Carlye said...

Scottie, I can't believe that I have lived my whole life (which has been considerably long) without hearing Porky singing "Blue Christmas"! Thanks for the reference.

Regina Wolfe-Parks said...

@Scottie and Carlye: the same here. I lived my whole life (and that's a long time!) and never heard this version. Better (and funnier) than Elvis. Estelle deserves this version.

She also deserves Arthur/er driving up in his Hooptie, dressed like Santa, with that sad looking dog in a reindeer outfit riding shotgun, coming to wine and dine Estelle, taking all of her money and presents.

Yahoonski, you said the only person you didn't show contempt for was Tommie. My choice is Arthur/er. Sure, he's a dishonest cockroach, with questionable hygiene, but he's funny and he was smart enough to get Estelle to send him 10 large. He would have a field day in Charterstone with all these idiots that must be huffing gasoline.

r u ok? said...

My choice is the Happy Hobo! Carting around shampoo and ketchup while helping people with his magical question, "Are you okay?"

Mrvy said...

There's a promising Worthy Award category; Least Contemptible Character. Could be two categories, one for major and one for minor.