Happy Mother's Day from the Amalfi Brothers!

The question remains... which one is Ron, and which one is Richie?

Mary Worth 194

There still seems to be a lot of confusion about which brother is Ron and which is Richie. Distinguishing the two rivals (who have despised each other for years, but who in literally three sentences have put all the venom and vitriol behind them) is particularly challenging for those who are still lucky enough to read Mary Worth on paper in black and white. But here's a tip that will help you: Richie has a buzz top, like Sgt. Carter, and Ron is an idiot, like Gomer Pyle.

Mary Worth 193

Richie seems to be taking the initiative here. Did Mary get to him out in the parking lot?

Here's a wonderful 1947 photo that I snagged from cartoonist Mike Lynch's blog of early Mary Worth artist Ken Ernst sketching Ruth Schmitt whom he had selected to represent a new character in Mary Worth. Ms. Schmitt was one of eight "Badger Beauties" at the University of Wisconsin. I have no idea what a Badger Beauty is, or what character she posed for, but I'm dying to know both.



For more background on Ken Ernst and his history with Mary Worth, click here.

Mary Worth 192

This should be interesting. Ron and Richie, never able to enter the same room for more than five seconds without going berserkers on each other, are now going to hug it out. If they can just keep it together until Mother's Day, when Donna revives long enough to see the boys embrace. She will pass in peace, and all because Mary Worth cared enough to meddle and observe, "You shouldn't fight so much. It makes your mother sad."

Mary Worth for Secretary of State! Think what she could accomplish in the Middle East with her tremendous powers of persuasion. Her foreign policy of meddling everywhere would come to be known as the "Worth Doctrine."

Mary Worth 191

Ron carries a lot of weight on those shoulders. It is tough being the oldest son. I speak from experience. When you're the oldest son, like me and Ron, you really do feel responsible for everything. It's rough... My siblings have no idea how rough it is. They'll never understand what Ron and I go through.

But, you also learn at a very early age to make the kitten eyes. And that usually takes care of everything. Ron definitely understands how the kitten eyes work.

Mary Worth 190

Oh, Mary, you old coot. I'm not sure how you've reached your diagnosis, but it couldn't be any less accurate than dead cats removing warts, so no harm done. Now, hurry down to room 47-G; there's a man with kidney stones who's wondering how to get rid of them (Hint: bring some pickle juice).

Mary Worth 189

Oh, Ron. It's over. You blew it. You let Mary Worth put her Puppetmaster touch on you. By simply placing her hand within inches of your spinal cord, she is able to transfer her will to your brain and overrule your self-determination. You are now merely her puppet.

It's already happening. From here on out, you'll agree to any suggestion Mary implants in your brain. Yes, they did love each other very much. Yes, my brother and I do fight a lot. Yes, we would like to come to dinner.

And with one final mesmerizing suggestion, Mary has completed the osmotic transfer of her own will over yours. Oh, Ron, at least you no longer need to waste time debating ancient philosophical questions such as, "Am I free to choose, or do I only think I am free to choose?" The answer now is, "Neither."

Mary Worth 188

Oh, Ron... you don't know the meaning of the word "suffer." Unless I miss my guess, Mary is about to apply some Queen Mother Meddling that she's patiently and painstakingly taken several days to plot. In less than a month, you'll be begging for someone to pull the plug on you.

Mary Worth 187

I guess it is too easy to criticize the mentally ill, but these two are the most disturbing adults I've ever seen. Ron continues to parrot his oppressive mother's martyr complex even as he prepares to bash her comatose body with a chair.

I can't wait to see Mary meddle in this one. This is going to require more than a simple, "You shouldn't fight with your brother, Ron." It may take electric shock therapy. Very cool.

Mary Worth 186

Here's something to remember:
I have to admit I find Ron and Richie's unrestrained and irrational rage refreshing after years of Mary's bitter passive aggression.