Wednesday, January 12, 2022

Mary Worth 3810

Everyone knows that "Medical Incident" is a euphemism for "Liquored Up."


Anonymous said...

Looks like she is speaking to the captain as he is steering the ship. Since when are passengers allowed in that area?

KitKat said...

Estelle didn’t want to say “He’s probably passed out in a men’s room”

Bill the Butcher said...

'Twas ocean; and the cruising ship
Did churn and sail on mid the wave
All bubbling was the Weelburbloke
And the dumb 'Shtelle outgrabe.

"Find the Weelburbloke, my man!
The combover patch, the rolls of pudge!
Stare at the CCTV, and shun
You duties for this spludge!"

The captain took his monitors in hand
Long the obese yow he sought
So stood he by the bridge's entry
And with his conscience fought.

And, as in deepening doubt he stood
Whether the company would assign blame
A burbling sound assailed his mood
And over the water came!

Purple! Blue! Purple! Blue! Like a cooling stew
Merciful reason gave out a quack.
He shook his head, and with no dread
Turned to his duties back.

"And hast thou drowned the Weelburbloke?
He's dead this minute, my beamish boy?
Oh full moon, hey! Calooh! Callay!"
We chortle in our joy.

'Twas full moon, and the Weelburbloke
Did spin and tumble to watery grave.
All ignored were Eshtelle's pleadings
And the ship sailed through the wave.

Anonymous said...

Um, June, that's not the same ship that Wilbur fell off of on Sunday. The bow of this ship is angular and pointy. The bow on Sunday's ship was curved and scoopy. (Don't you just love nautical talk?)

-- Scottie McW.

batgirl said...

Don’t get your hopes too high, folks! Recall the story of Bob Lord, who survived 8 hours floating in much colder waters.

And Mya DeRyan, who survived 5 hours.

I remember sitting on a ferry in northern BC listening to a conversation between two old fishermen and a brash young fellow. One old guy said that if you went over in these waters you’d last less than an hour before hypothermia got you.
“Why do you have to wear a lifejacket, then?” asked the younger guy.
“Makes it easier to find the body.”

Anonymous said...

@batgirl -- Ha haaaa, excellent anecdote!

-- S. McW.

LouiseF said...

Great comments, everyone! I really think we ought to outlaw calling someone a boy (or girl)friend if they are over the age of 35. It just sounds silly. Plus, Estelle, nobody wants to know the status of your relationship with Wilbur. Ewww.. Why not just call him your "travelling companion" or, better yet, your "snivelling companion".

Unknown said...

If this story line continues throughout January, I may have a couple of "medical incidents" too!

Garnet said...

I'd like to hear her describe the situation:

Captain: "Does he have a medical condition?"

Estelle: "No, he's just angry that I refused to marry him right here right now, and he's most likely liquored up."

Captain: "...Okay, can you describe him?"

Estelle: "He's about a foot shorter than me, fat, and balding with a sparse comb-over."

Captain "Ma'am, are you sure you'd like us to find him?"

Ian Cameron, PhD said...

Point taken, LouiseF - although the "boy" part could be a good fit with Wilbur's level of emotional maturity. I think the phrase Estelle was looking for is "petulant toddlerlike man-child-friend". Or perhaps "petulant todderlike man-child-estranged-acquaintance".

Steve said...

Louise F: Yes, it should be outlawed! Another phrase that should be outlawed is "Happy New Year" after January 10th

Ian Cameron, PhD: Maybe with Wilbur gone, we can see more of under-rated supporting characters such as yourself. We haven't seen you since February 2019

Anonymous said...

Remember when Wilbur drank and drove up to a cliff? Threw his money at a south American scam lady... Drunk and obnoxious in a resturant, ignores his daughter...yada yada yada.
Moy has created a most dislikable character. Wilbur really is an unpleasent cartoon person.. a drunk, demanding. Small wonder we are celbrating his hopeful desmise
~The Merry Pookster

meg said...

And yet- and yet- If I could find it (even in the Immaculate Files of Wanders, probably not), I well recall someone remarking,
‘Yaay! A Wilbur story!’ Sometime over the past ten years….could’ve been Goody! At some point, we liked him, we really liked him.

Anonymous said...

“If this story line continues throughout January, I may have a couple of "medical incidents" too!”

As long as we get the pool party/memorial service with Estelle singing “My Heart Will Go In”. Then they can drop the storyline.

Anonymous said...

They are going to find him. Otherwise, Estelle will think she caused him to fling himself overboard in despair, and we'll have to spend the next year watching her gorge herself on muffins while she is seeking counseling from Mary.

Anonymous said...

The first mate or whatever he is, is looking at the Captain, like "Oh crap; not another one."


Anonymous said...

how does estelle go from looking sixty something to today in her thirtys .amazing this artist

Sandi Ego said...

Bill the Butcher, thank you for the epic poem! Weelburbloke is classic. I'm starting to have that sinking feeling (ha ha) that Wilbur really will survive. The joy when he went overboard; the fear when someone suggested it was only a dream; the joy when it's clear he's missing... just waiting for the bad news.