The weekly quotation in the splash panel sent me down a Google rabbit hole. The only semi-prominent figure named Tom Kite is a golfer, and I guess he would encounter obstructions on a golf course? You’re reaching, KM!
Anyway, kudos to Jared for calling Dawn out immediately. You’re too good for her, Jared!
Nicely spotted, @fauxprof. It looks like Karen nabbed the top pick of brainyquote.com.
Though I much prefer some of the others, like "Golf course design is exciting", and "It's a piece of property that, if you're going to have a development out here, you need to have a golf course because you need to take care of the effluent water being created by the development."
Dawn attempts to avert her eyes from Mr. Bodacious V. Smallmouth, but Jared keeps a keen eye on him.
Suddenly, with a ferocious roar, the handsome Mr. S jumps over the fence and into the cougar enclosure. The cougars circle warily, considering what part to attack first. Onlookers scream. Mr. S. begins to talk to the cougars in an unknown language (actually Pig Latin, the last American speaker of which is yours truly).
They seem temporarily interested, but are licking their chops nonetheless. What to do, what to do? Mary Worth appears and throws frozen muffins, hoping to distract the beasts. Dr. Jeff tugs impatiently at Mary’s arm, fearful of missing the Early Bird special at the Crumb Canoe, the new senior hotspot in Santa Royale.
Two men in white coats show up with nets: “Mr. S.! Come with us, you’re missing Bingo Night at Cute Guy Manor!” Bupkis.
Jared (clumsily) leaps into the cougar pit. The cougars are distracted, first by Jared, and then by Mary’s muffins. Jared begins to lecture about cougar habits, lifestyles and preferences. He has hypnotized the dangerous beasts! No, they’re just bored and falling asleep.
Jared seizes the opportunity and uses his superpower (scrawny guy scrappiness) to lift the deeply deluded BVS to safety.
He’s leaves with the men in white coats, all of them singing the score from CATS. Jared acknowledges the applause of onlookers, gives rapid fire interviews to CNN, CBS, ABC, and Animal Planet, rejoins Dawn and continues his monologue about baboons.
Brava, brava @meg!! You had me on the edge of my seat as you described that riveting scene. You even battled the annoyingly fearsome autocorrect! And bingo, Dawn’s photo could be in Merriam-Webster’s next to the definition of “vapid.”
9 comments:
Fine research, Wanders! Does CVS carry clarity? If so, Dawn go there after the zoo. Clarity is probably in the Skin Care section.
Mr. Square Jaw is shooting photos for his Insta account, just like his boyfriend, Drew.
The weekly quotation in the splash panel sent me down a Google rabbit hole. The only semi-prominent figure named Tom Kite is a golfer, and I guess he would encounter obstructions on a golf course? You’re reaching, KM!
Anyway, kudos to Jared for calling Dawn out immediately. You’re too good for her, Jared!
A better quote box would have been "You can't hide your lyin' eyes" -- Don Henley and Glenn Frey
-- Scottie McW.
You might want to ease up a little bit, Jared. With your vast knowledge, I'm sure you've heard of "the power of suggestion"?
HelenClark
Nicely spotted, @fauxprof. It looks like Karen nabbed the top pick of brainyquote.com.
Though I much prefer some of the others, like "Golf course design is exciting", and "It's a piece of property that, if you're going to have a development out here, you need to have a golf course because you need to take care of the effluent water being created by the development."
https://www.brainyquote.com/authors/tom-kite-quotes
Dawn attempts to avert her eyes from Mr. Bodacious V. Smallmouth, but Jared keeps a keen eye on him.
Suddenly, with a ferocious roar, the handsome Mr. S jumps over the fence and into the cougar enclosure. The cougars circle warily, considering what part to attack first. Onlookers scream. Mr. S. begins to talk to the cougars in an unknown language (actually Pig Latin, the last American speaker of which is yours truly).
They seem temporarily interested, but are licking their chops nonetheless. What to do, what to do? Mary Worth appears and throws frozen muffins, hoping to distract the beasts. Dr. Jeff tugs impatiently at Mary’s arm, fearful of missing the Early Bird special at the Crumb Canoe, the new senior hotspot in Santa Royale.
Two men in white coats show up with nets: “Mr. S.! Come with us, you’re missing Bingo Night at Cute Guy Manor!” Bupkis.
Jared (clumsily) leaps into the cougar pit. The cougars are distracted, first by Jared, and then by Mary’s muffins. Jared begins to lecture about cougar habits, lifestyles and preferences. He has hypnotized the dangerous beasts! No, they’re just bored and falling asleep.
Jared seizes the opportunity and uses his superpower (scrawny guy scrappiness) to lift the deeply deluded BVS to safety.
He’s leaves with the men in white coats, all of them singing the score from CATS. Jared acknowledges the applause of onlookers, gives rapid fire interviews to CNN, CBS, ABC, and Animal Planet, rejoins Dawn and continues his monologue about baboons.
Dawn remains valid.
VAPID! Dawn remains VAPID!
Brava, brava @meg!! You had me on the edge of my seat as you described that riveting scene. You even battled the annoyingly fearsome autocorrect! And bingo, Dawn’s photo could be in Merriam-Webster’s next to the definition of “vapid.”
Aw, shucks.
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