Hey, we hit 4,000 -- 4,000 of the wittiest snarks this side of The Onion! Great job, everybody.
Getting back to the matter at hand, I realize these parrots are Mensa material, but -- to be delicate -- has Toby set up a littler box or something for them? Or are they just carpet bombing the place? -- Scottie
I don't suppose there's any point in telling Toby that you can't just listen, you have to speak also. Copy the parrots, Toby! And watch Friends in Spanish.
Yes, that's what I thought at first. But then that shriveled part of my brain that is conscious of MoyZone things fired a lone synapse to remind me that we might still have a week -- or, God forbid, two -- of Mary telling Jeff all about the Great Parrot Drama and the Lessons It Taught Everyone and its Confirmation of the Most Noble Characteristics of the Human Spirit during their sunset cruise, dinner at the BB, and stroll along the boardwalk -- or as Jeff knows it, the bored walk.
But I pray that you are right and my brain is wrong. It's been known to happen. -- Scottie
After dress rehearsal for his role in the Santa Royale Little Theater production of “Happy Days, Live!”, Jeff calls Mary. “I’ll pick you up in my ‘55 Corvette in an hour. I have to give Fonzie, Potsie, and Chachi a ride to Arnold’s Drive In.”
Jeff should invite someone like Ashlee (remember her?) rather than Mary. That would be fun!
Instead of Mary droning on and on about the Camerons' marriage and that Parrots are Good!, Jeff should talk about his kids, if he remembers who they are.
I would love to know what Dr. J. thinks he's doing with the car hood up. You can't do anything to today's cars - they're all computers and electronics.
Jeff needs to get out in front of this and explain to Mary why his name is in the latest batch of Epstein files. -- Scottie
P.S. A commenter on Comics Kingdom pointed out that the raised hood on Jeff's car is waaaay too long for the engine compartment. If he tries to close it, it will cover up the bottom half of his windshield. And he/she is absolutely right!
It occurs to me, that unless I missed something, Mary has never met the parrots. Wanna take bets on how Sunny and Rosie react to Mary? My money is on both of them calling out, "Nosy parker".
Jeff never learns, does he? Perhaps they would have nothing to talk about if he didn't encourage Mary to gossip about her friends. They certainly seem to have a very limited repertoire of date occasions.
“…someone like Ian who seems set in his ways.” FGS, Jeff, look in the mirror! Sunset cruise…Bum Boat…meaningless palaver…passionless elbow patting…closed-mouth kissing… Now who’s set in his ways? Unhuh, I thought so.
Whoa, they switched places and now Mary is now at the controls of the S.S. Humongo. Yeah, okay. I'll bet Brigman does this just to mess with people. -- Scottie
Those are very small plates to accommodate seafood sampler platters.Does the server bring out each piece of seafood individually? Jeff's plate appears to have a piece of liver on it.
So the people who always go to the same deserted restaurant after the same kind of sunset cruise (and who always wear purple cowl-neck sweaters, Mary) while gossiping about their friends are congratulating themselves on how open to change they are. Blah blah blah etc. etc.
Sorry, June. You're busted. I remember the last time Mary decided to change things up and order something other than her usual salmon. I'd recognize those tiny white, pasty scallops anywhere.
I don't think Jeff has changed all that much...looks like he opted for the surf and turf again, and maybe not even the surf. BTW Mary, I don't think I've ever seen 'flounder' on a menu in California...halibut, sure, but we don't call it flounder.
Ah, the ugliest apple pie and Kool Whyp imaginable, on play dishes with toddler forks. No wonder Mary and Jeff are always the only patrons at the Bum Boat.
@KitKat and @MissScarlett -- Look at that, Mary's back to eating right-handed again. Maybe she eats lefty only when she's with Toby in an attempt to ward off being infected with her Tobyness or something.
Speaking of witchcraft, Mary replied to Jeff's remark even before he made it. Spooky. Or maybe not. Maybe it's just the dull sameness of all their evenings together.
But it does look like they've finished discussing The Adventure of Sunny, Rosie, Ditzy, and The Mad Glaswegian. We hope. -- Scottie
I thought the same, @Scottie. That's peculiar. Did the cat accompany Drew and his buddy golfing? If Drew lives with dear old dad, why haven't we seen or heard anything about him in ages?
Per the Google AI, Balinese cats are "extremely loving, chatty, and opinionated." Two out of three sound like Mary. Anyway, it appears that we may be embarking upon months of "Mary Gets a Cat." See you on Memorial Day, Worthiverse friends.
I don't know, Scottie. I mean, if dogs and cats can do yoga, and parrots can teach someone a second language, I suppose a cat can play golf. Drew, Jeff, Drew's friend; they needed a fourth, didn't they?
Yes, I agree with all the hilarious snarks. This is balderdash! What clod brings a cat to another person's home? And why is Drew bringing him to his father's home? And people only become less allergic through constant exposure. And frankly, I don't think Mary needs another pet. She already has Jeff.
Hold it right there, Mary (and KM)! Anyone who sets out to adopt an animal "even if it's temporary" should NOT proceed. Adopting an animal is a commitment, not something done on a whim. Who would Mary "rehome," i.e., dump, the unfortunate animal on? Wilbur? KM has gone animal wacko the past few months.
Right on, @KitKat! You're either all-in or all-out with a pet. There's no in between. Sounds like its best if Mary remains all-out.
But if she does get a cat, I hope it plays golf too. And is bilingual. And does yoga. And shreds whatever pompous axx Jeff happens to bring over. -- Scottie
I'm with you guys, KitKat and Scottie. Over the years KM has proven, time and time again, that she is clueless on pretty much everything, but this particular subject hits home for me. As someone who believes strongly in animal rescue, I can hardly believe she would be so stupid as to have Mary state that she'd try out a cat ownership even if it were only temporary. I'm not someone who believes in violence, but KM deserves a good sharp clatter up the side of the head for that one.
Bobo??!! Urgh. What does Jeff have to be relived about? Mary never voiced a previous desire to have a pet. She's always gotten rid of all animals that dared come near her. BTW, I agree with all the adopting comments, as well as all the idiocy directed toward Moy. I wonder though, can't people foster animals? Isn't the intent that they are just keeping them until they are adopted? I know the Pasadena SPCA does this. You still have to go through a very thorough vetting process, which Mary would never pass, of course.
Uh-oh, Mary! It's a full moon and Jeff is getting frisky again! You better throw cold water on this quickly if you don't want yet another extremely awkward end to an evening. -- Scottie
4,040 comments:
«Oldest ‹Older 4001 – 4040 of 4040Hey, we hit 4,000 -- 4,000 of the wittiest snarks this side of The Onion! Great job, everybody.
Getting back to the matter at hand, I realize these parrots are Mensa material, but -- to be delicate -- has Toby set up a littler box or something for them? Or are they just carpet bombing the place? -- Scottie
@Scottie, perhaps in the MoyZone parrots only poop voluntarily in Ian's shoes.
I guess Toby spilling the beans about Rosie to Mary happened between panels one day.
"Ian and I reaffirmed our love for each other on our latest date night" is cringeworthy -- yuck.
Not "Salty," Mary; let's go with "Poopy."
I don't suppose there's any point in telling Toby that you can't just listen, you have to speak also. Copy the parrots, Toby! And watch Friends in Spanish.
Hey! I think we're on to a new story. Whew!
@MissScarlett -- A new story!
Yes, that's what I thought at first. But then that shriveled part of my brain that is conscious of MoyZone things fired a lone synapse to remind me that we might still have a week -- or, God forbid, two -- of Mary telling Jeff all about the Great Parrot Drama and the Lessons It Taught Everyone and its Confirmation of the Most Noble Characteristics of the Human Spirit during their sunset cruise, dinner at the BB, and stroll along the boardwalk -- or as Jeff knows it, the bored walk.
But I pray that you are right and my brain is wrong. It's been known to happen. -- Scottie
After dress rehearsal for his role in the Santa Royale Little Theater production of “Happy Days, Live!”, Jeff calls Mary. “I’ll pick you up in my ‘55 Corvette in an hour. I have to give Fonzie, Potsie, and Chachi a ride to Arnold’s Drive In.”
Jeff should invite someone like Ashlee (remember her?) rather than Mary. That would be fun!
Instead of Mary droning on and on about the Camerons' marriage and that Parrots are Good!, Jeff should talk about his kids, if he remembers who they are.
@Scottie, you've sent shivers down my spine!
I would love to know what Dr. J. thinks he's doing with the car hood up. You can't do anything to today's cars - they're all computers and electronics.
Jeff needs to get out in front of this and explain to Mary why his name is in the latest batch of Epstein files. -- Scottie
P.S. A commenter on Comics Kingdom pointed out that the raised hood on Jeff's car is waaaay too long for the engine compartment. If he tries to close it, it will cover up the bottom half of his windshield. And he/she is absolutely right!
Haha @Scottie, you're right: KM needs to get more topical!
What's up with the windshield of the S.S. Doc's Folly? Yipe.
Jeff, please describe "typical bird owners."
It occurs to me, that unless I missed something, Mary has never met the parrots. Wanna take bets on how Sunny and Rosie react to Mary? My money is on both of them calling out, "Nosy parker".
What prompted them to adopt parrots? Let’s see what Ian had to say when he realized what had happened:
“Hoo daur ye scatter yer feaithers an’ yer scatter aw ower mah mahogany 3/4 size reproduction ay the Resolute desk?! Gie a cage, ye two!”
“yer scat” not “yer scatter”. And don’t ye scatter yer scat, either!
How much beer does Jeff consume beforehand so he can pretend to be interested in Mary's blather? "Toby met her parrot on a park bench." Egad....
Jeff never learns, does he? Perhaps they would have nothing to talk about if he didn't encourage Mary to gossip about her friends. They certainly seem to have a very limited repertoire of date occasions.
“…someone like Ian who seems set in his ways.” FGS, Jeff, look in the mirror! Sunset cruise…Bum Boat…meaningless palaver…passionless elbow patting…closed-mouth kissing… Now who’s set in his ways? Unhuh, I thought so.
@meg, we can add Jeff asking, "How's my favorite girl?" to start off that hackneyed routine. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz....
Whoa, they switched places and now Mary is now at the controls of the S.S. Humongo. Yeah, okay. I'll bet Brigman does this just to mess with people. -- Scottie
Those are very small plates to accommodate seafood sampler platters.Does the server bring out each piece of seafood individually? Jeff's plate appears to have a piece of liver on it.
So the people who always go to the same deserted restaurant after the same kind of sunset cruise (and who always wear purple cowl-neck sweaters, Mary) while gossiping about their friends are congratulating themselves on how open to change they are. Blah blah blah etc. etc.
Sorry, June. You're busted. I remember the last time Mary decided to change things up and order something other than her usual salmon. I'd recognize those tiny white, pasty scallops anywhere.
I don't think Jeff has changed all that much...looks like he opted for the surf and turf again, and maybe not even the surf. BTW Mary, I don't think I've ever seen 'flounder' on a menu in California...halibut, sure, but we don't call it flounder.
Ah, the ugliest apple pie and Kool Whyp imaginable, on play dishes with toddler forks. No wonder Mary and Jeff are always the only patrons at the Bum Boat.
@KitKat and @MissScarlett -- Look at that, Mary's back to eating right-handed again. Maybe she eats lefty only when she's with Toby in an attempt to ward off being infected with her Tobyness or something.
Speaking of witchcraft, Mary replied to Jeff's remark even before he made it. Spooky. Or maybe not. Maybe it's just the dull sameness of all their evenings together.
But it does look like they've finished discussing The Adventure of Sunny, Rosie, Ditzy, and The Mad Glaswegian. We hope. -- Scottie
Next week Toby and Ian have Mary over for squab. Mary notices both birds are gone.
Never mind, that would actually be interesting.
Isn't that cute? Mary lets Jeff think that he can give her orders!
@Thunderheels: fingers crossed! That would be fun!
"Jeff, with your allergies? How would that work?"
"Well, Mary, the last time I spent any time alone with you in your apartment was in 1995."
As someone who is allergic to cats; his comment shows just how desperate Jeff is.
Wait a minute. Drew's buddy brings his cat along with him when he visits people? Holy moley, this is just . . . I don't know what. -- Scottie
I thought the same, @Scottie. That's peculiar. Did the cat accompany Drew and his buddy golfing? If Drew lives with dear old dad, why haven't we seen or heard anything about him in ages?
Per the Google AI, Balinese cats are "extremely loving, chatty, and opinionated." Two out of three sound like Mary. Anyway, it appears that we may be embarking upon months of "Mary Gets a Cat." See you on Memorial Day, Worthiverse friends.
I don't know, Scottie. I mean, if dogs and cats can do yoga, and parrots can teach someone a second language, I suppose a cat can play golf. Drew, Jeff, Drew's friend; they needed a fourth, didn't they?
Ha ha, @hmmm. Very good! -- Scottie
Yes, I agree with all the hilarious snarks. This is balderdash! What clod brings a cat to another person's home? And why is Drew bringing him to his father's home? And people only become less allergic through constant exposure. And frankly, I don't think Mary needs another pet. She already has Jeff.
Hold it right there, Mary (and KM)! Anyone who sets out to adopt an animal "even if it's temporary" should NOT proceed. Adopting an animal is a commitment, not something done on a whim. Who would Mary "rehome," i.e., dump, the unfortunate animal on? Wilbur? KM has gone animal wacko the past few months.
Bobo the Balinese??!
Right on, @KitKat! You're either all-in or all-out with a pet. There's no in between. Sounds like its best if Mary remains all-out.
But if she does get a cat, I hope it plays golf too. And is bilingual. And does yoga. And shreds whatever pompous axx Jeff happens to bring over. -- Scottie
I'm with you guys, KitKat and Scottie. Over the years KM has proven, time and time again, that she is clueless on pretty much everything, but this particular subject hits home for me. As someone who believes strongly in animal rescue, I can hardly believe she would be so stupid as to have Mary state that she'd try out a cat ownership even if it were only temporary. I'm not someone who believes in violence, but KM deserves a good sharp clatter up the side of the head for that one.
Bobo??!! Urgh. What does Jeff have to be relived about? Mary never voiced a previous desire to have a pet. She's always gotten rid of all animals that dared come near her.
BTW, I agree with all the adopting comments, as well as all the idiocy directed toward Moy. I wonder though, can't people foster animals? Isn't the intent that they are just keeping them until they are adopted? I know the Pasadena SPCA does this. You still have to go through a very thorough vetting process, which Mary would never pass, of course.
Don’t let the kids see Saturday’s strip if they are able to interpret the double entendres shared by Mary and Jeff. He may get lucky tonight!
@meg, are you implying that Mary's about to ask Jeff about the gun in his pocket?
Uh-oh, Mary! It's a full moon and Jeff is getting frisky again! You better throw cold water on this quickly if you don't want yet another extremely awkward end to an evening. -- Scottie
Shouldn't Jeff know about the full-moon affect on ERs? Maybe he only pretends to be a doctor.
Can you feel the love tonight?
No, not really.
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