"Estelle my darling, in the accident I sustained some facial injuries to my ruggedly handsome physiognomy. Cosmetic surgery will make things right, but I need to pay the doctors a deposit first. I know you want to help, so for simplicity's sake just give me your online banking user ID and password. As soon as the doctors get my deposit, they'll hop to it, and my outstanding appearance will be restored!"
@Nance at 9:31 a.m., "Okay, truck aren't" just cracks me up..
I guess we all have a pretty good idea of how this will go.
"It's going to cost about $80,000 to replace my equipment. Unfortunately, it will take a couple months for the insurance money to come through. Which means my return to Santa Royale is going be delayed."
"Arther, I could loan you the money until the insurance comes through."
"Oh no. That's very generous of you, Ester . . . er, Estelle, but I couldn't possibly accept. I'll just stick it out here in this snake-infested jungle until I can replace my equipment. But thank you very much for the offer."
"Arther, I really want to help. I want to see you as soon as possible."
My guess is that Estelle is looking a bit haggard today, because she was up all night worrying about Arthur. That hardly compares to how haggard she will look after the next three days of Arthur spinning his web of heart-wrenching details around her.
I am starting to think that Estelle is a bigger moron than Wilbur. Case in point:
1) Finds Mr. "Easy on the eyes". 2) Swallows his Maylasia story hook, line and sinker. 3) Talks to him morning, noon and night but never Skypes or Facetime to see if he's an actual human being. 4) Sighs incessantly over poems he stole out of the book "Best Loved Poems of the American People". (Yes, this is a real book. My parents had it in their book collection.) 5) Buys his ridiculous explanation as to why he signed his text "Arther". 6)Is going to be a total idiot and empty out her bank account (including any money she inherited from poor, dead Jim's life insurance) and send it to Arther/Arthur/Danny DeVito. 7) Will go crying to Mary after Arther/Arthur/Danny gets what he wants and she'll never hear from him again. She be broke, but probably not any wiser.
Adding insult to injury. Since Estelle has no idea what Arthur/Arther/Danny looks like, he will move into Charterstone on her dime and start his grift on other Charterstonians such as Toby, Mary and Wilbur, with whom he will pretend to be a hot Latina that looks like Fabiana.
I think it's time for a vote. Who thinks Estelle will fall for the scam? I think she will almost fall for it, but Mary will save her. Remember, make sure it's boring.
Scam? What scam! Let me introduct myself. My names are Arther Zed, and as dear freind of Estelle I am offensive that you think I am scam. I demand satisfaction! We will dwell at dawn. Choose your weapon: smartphone, laptop, or wreckinged truck?
I vote that Estelle will frantically run over to Mary's apt to discuss. Over muffins, Mary will get suspicious and save the day. I still contend only to protect Libby. Are we sure that Estelle's husband passed away? Or did he run away because he couldn't take how incredibly dumb Estelle is?
Ten thousand bucks to get back on schedule, hmm? Why not tack on another 5K or more to speed things up, Arther? If Estelle was dopey emotion fall for your reasin for misspelling your name, she’ll go along with anything. Maybe she’ll accidentally run over Mary in her Volvo in her haste.
13 comments:
aaannndddd, here it comes. He is going to ask for money for his truck (which his employer should be responsible for)
Estelle looks pretty crappy today, as well.
Today's Boldface Haiku is titled
"Arthur Sets The Hook".
Arthur! Happened?
Hear worried!
Okay, truck aren't!
Overseeing accident!
Terrible! hurt!
"Estelle my darling, in the accident I sustained some facial injuries to my ruggedly handsome physiognomy. Cosmetic surgery will make things right, but I need to pay the doctors a deposit first. I know you want to help, so for simplicity's sake just give me your online banking user ID and password. As soon as the doctors get my deposit, they'll hop to it, and my outstanding appearance will be restored!"
@Nance at 9:31 a.m., "Okay, truck aren't" just cracks me up..
I guess we all have a pretty good idea of how this will go.
"It's going to cost about $80,000 to replace my equipment. Unfortunately, it will take a couple months for the insurance money to come through. Which means my return to Santa Royale is going be delayed."
"Arther, I could loan you the money until the insurance comes through."
"Oh no. That's very generous of you, Ester . . . er, Estelle, but I couldn't possibly accept. I'll just stick it out here in this snake-infested jungle until I can replace my equipment. But thank you very much for the offer."
"Arther, I really want to help. I want to see you as soon as possible."
"Welllll, okaaaayyyy, if you insist."
-- Scottie McW.
My guess is that Estelle is looking a bit haggard today, because she was up all night worrying about Arthur. That hardly compares to how haggard she will look after the next three days of Arthur spinning his web of heart-wrenching details around her.
So, will Mary intervene before or after Estelle sends Arther all her money?
Does Estelle even know his last name yet? She is such a twit.
I am starting to think that Estelle is a bigger moron than Wilbur. Case in point:
1) Finds Mr. "Easy on the eyes".
2) Swallows his Maylasia story hook, line and sinker.
3) Talks to him morning, noon and night but never Skypes or Facetime to see if he's an actual human being.
4) Sighs incessantly over poems he stole out of the book "Best Loved Poems of the American People". (Yes, this is a real book. My parents had it in their book collection.)
5) Buys his ridiculous explanation as to why he signed his text "Arther".
6)Is going to be a total idiot and empty out her bank account (including any money she inherited from poor, dead Jim's life insurance) and send it to Arther/Arthur/Danny DeVito.
7) Will go crying to Mary after Arther/Arthur/Danny gets what he wants and she'll never hear from him again. She be broke, but probably not any wiser.
Adding insult to injury. Since Estelle has no idea what Arthur/Arther/Danny looks like, he will move into Charterstone on her dime and start his grift on other Charterstonians such as Toby, Mary and Wilbur, with whom he will pretend to be a hot Latina that looks like Fabiana.
What I really want to know is why the exclamation mark following terrible isn't bolded.
I think it's time for a vote. Who thinks Estelle will fall for the scam? I think she will almost fall for it, but Mary will save her. Remember, make sure it's boring.
Scam? What scam! Let me introduct myself. My names are Arther Zed, and as dear freind of Estelle I am offensive that you think I am scam. I demand satisfaction! We will dwell at dawn. Choose your weapon: smartphone, laptop, or wreckinged truck?
I vote that Estelle will frantically run over to Mary's apt to discuss. Over muffins, Mary will get suspicious and save the day. I still contend only to protect Libby. Are we sure that Estelle's husband passed away? Or did he run away because he couldn't take how incredibly dumb Estelle is?
Ten thousand bucks to get back on schedule, hmm? Why not tack on another 5K or more to speed things up, Arther? If Estelle was dopey emotion fall for your reasin for misspelling your name, she’ll go along with anything. Maybe she’ll accidentally run over Mary in her Volvo in her haste.
Argh, stupid autocorrect! I meant “If Estelle was dopey enough to fall for your reason...”
Post a Comment