I had to go and look up Macallan 12. It's a top shelf scotch for starters. (Someone must have given it to Wilbur as a gift. I doubt he'd spring 60 bucks for a bottle.) Number two, when is scotch purple? Did he mix it with Welch's grape juice to dilute the taste?
No Wilbur, it wasn't work or any of the other things you mentioned. You're a conceited jerk who hit pause on your relationship with Iris and ran off with Fabian and planned to live a life of inland beaches in Bogota and salsa dancing until "cousin" Pedro came along and spoiled your plans. You came back $30,000 poorer, but not any wiser. You figured that Iris was sitting by the phone, pining away for you. When she wasn't you became a crazed stalker and then drowned yourself (literally and figuratively) with karaoke.
One more thing: I'd like to think that Wilbur will say this line from Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy: "I love scotch. Scotchy, scotch, scotch. Here it goes down, down into my belly..."
just realkized that around this time ALdo Kelrast did the Thelma and louise (Sept 27th is Aldo Kelrast day) --wonder if the Schotch was taken by Wilbur when they cleaned out Kelrast's condo --anyway let us hope for the pufferfish sushi.
I don't really want to stick up for Wilbur here, but wasn't it actually Iris who broke up with him? I just went back to Nov. 11, 2016 (via Wander's archives under the label: Blah Blah Bench) and Iris is telling Wilbur that she wants to live separate lives while he's traveling for the next year. Just saying that I'm sort of confused as to which one of these dopes broke up with the other one first.
Time Hop- 11/5/2016 Wilbur: I don’t want to regret living a life without adventure! I have a chance to do it now! Iris: I see. But twelve months? We’d be separated again for a whole year! Wilbur: Time goes quickly. I’ll be back after that! Try to see it my way...
25 comments:
Wine for liquid courage? Lightweight.
When did Welch’s start marketing scotch? Is this a Halloween special?
Today's Boldface Haiku is titled
"Wilbur Finally Lands On His Pre-Existing Condition".
(Why break up?
Work travel?
Something else?
Stupidity before?)
I had to go and look up Macallan 12. It's a top shelf scotch for starters. (Someone must have given it to Wilbur as a gift. I doubt he'd spring 60 bucks for a bottle.) Number two, when is scotch purple? Did he mix it with Welch's grape juice to dilute the taste?
No Wilbur, it wasn't work or any of the other things you mentioned. You're a conceited jerk who hit pause on your relationship with Iris and ran off with Fabian and planned to live a life of inland beaches in Bogota and salsa dancing until "cousin" Pedro came along and spoiled your plans. You came back $30,000 poorer, but not any wiser. You figured that Iris was sitting by the phone, pining away for you. When she wasn't you became a crazed stalker and then drowned yourself (literally and figuratively) with karaoke.
To put it bluntly: Wilbur, you're a drunken jerk.
@kitkat, you beat me to the punch about Welch's. (No pun intended, Wilbur.)
One more thing: I'd like to think that Wilbur will say this line from Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy: "I love scotch. Scotchy, scotch, scotch. Here it goes down, down into my belly..."
Grape juice? No, this is Wilbur. Methylated spirits.
"Why did Iris and I break up anyway?"!!! Did he really ask that?????
IT'S BECAUSE YOU DUMPED HER FOR A HOT EMPANADA, THAT'S WHY, YOU TORPID IMBECILE!
Jeez, this guy's cluelessness is incredible.
It's too bad McCallan's doesn't bottle self-awareness.
-- Scottie McW.
He is going to go all Jill Black on us. (An old reference, hope you get it)
you know --something positive might come out of this --the whiskey might make Wilbur tolerable and likeable. So Iris takes him back.
just realkized that around this time ALdo Kelrast did the Thelma and louise (Sept 27th is Aldo Kelrast day) --wonder if the Schotch was taken by Wilbur when they cleaned out Kelrast's condo --anyway let us hope for the pufferfish sushi.
I don't really want to stick up for Wilbur here, but wasn't it actually Iris who broke up with him? I just went back to Nov. 11, 2016 (via Wander's archives under the label: Blah Blah Bench) and Iris is telling Wilbur that she wants to live separate lives while he's traveling for the next year. Just saying that I'm sort of confused as to which one of these dopes broke up with the other one first.
Moy is confused too.
HA! Jill Black, but with singing. That would be awesome.
Sounds like it's time for Estelle to learn "I'm Gonna Wash that Man Right Outta My Hair" on the piano.
I hear that train a'rollin'
It's rollin' down the track
I hear that Wilbur fallin' down
Oh, wait... was that a splat?!
Grumpy Ole Doc
This is getting kind of good.
I do believe Wilbur is going to pull a "Jill Black" on us. I hope he makes a huge spectacle of himself in front of Zack.
He really deserved to be dumped. He ditched Iris for a younger lady who was clearly a scammer.
I suppose purple scotch makes about as much sense as anything else in this strip.
HelenClark
@Garnet - I agree. Depending on how this plays out today's panel might vie for panel of the year - "Purple Courage" TM by The Macallan
Now I’m gonna be worried that Wilbur will be too drunk to drive himself up to Suicide Point after dinner. With any luck, Mary can drive him.
Pretty sure that if Wilbur's planning to pick up Estelle with Scotch on his breath, he should switch his panel two monologue into the present tense.
Wilbur will wind up in a Purple Haze.
He just liked the scotch bottle. He used it to pour his leftover wine coolers into.
Time Hop- 11/5/2016
Wilbur: I don’t want to regret living a life without adventure! I have a chance to do it now!
Iris: I see. But twelve months? We’d be separated again for a whole year!
Wilbur: Time goes quickly. I’ll be back after that! Try to see it my way...
Purple Drank yo.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Purple_drank
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