THANK YOU to those who have donated to the Mary Worth 4000 campaign! And thanks for your patience while I set up the proper link. Thanks for all your kinds words and support as we celebrate over 4,000 Mary Worth and Me posts.
Donors so far:
Karen K.
Helen M.
Deep Value Letter
Marilyn T.
Margaret T.
Richard F.
Conrad R.
James D.
Today marks my 4,000th Mary Worth post. Which is nothing compared to what Karen Moy has written. Still, I want to celebrate. And I'm looking for good ideas. Your thoughts, and your tips, are always welcome! Let's celebrate together!
You can't imagine it? I'm so relieved... because it would be devastating.
And now a huge thank you to Julie N. and Michael B. for their generous donations to the Santa Royale Rehabilitation Fund! I'm glad you enjoy MW&M.
Estelle, what do you think dating is? I have to spend more time with Wilbur, before I decide whether to spend more time with him. Or do you mean, I have to go on more dates with Wilbur before I decide whether to keep dating him?
But, MARY! Your relationship with Jeff is like Estelle's relationship with Wilbur? Does Jeff know? Oh, yes, of course he knows. I just always assume that when Jeff isn't in the strip, he's home alone, crying into his pillow.
And again, you guys, thank you to Jim, Buckley and Leslie for making kind and generous donations yesterday. I'm really touched by the comments many of you made with your donations. Thanks everyone. I think I want to spend more time with you. At least another month!
Really? Square one? Where were you before? Square two? Maybe three. You've had a hamburger with him and watched a boxing documentary. What else do you need to know about this buffoon who you thought was The One? Did you not communicate at all while he was overseas? At least Arthur contacted you everyday from Malaysia, or wherever it was. Even if it was just to ask you for money.
Speaking of asking for money, a special thank you to Karen, Meg, Laura and Jeffrey for your donations this week. Hearing my call for help, you decided to keep me motivated. Your donations were really appreciated.
Overeager isn't the exact word I was thinking.
And a special thank you to all you overeager readers who sent me large sums yesterday. I love you dearly, my pets. If you send me another large sum, I may even be able to come visit!
Wait... IS Arthur real? Is it unreasonable to think that Estelle could be imagining this whole thing? Is she schizophrenic? Perhaps all the email exchanges and phone calls have just been created in her own malfunctioning mind. If that's the case, where has she been sending her money? I better go check my PayPal account. By the way, you can send your money to my PayPal account, too. I can't promise I'll come visit, but I will send a nice thank you note.
Gosh, people sure were hip during the Great Depression.
I want to thank everyone who participated in our Winter Fund Raising Campaign! Thanks to your generous support, we were able to surpass our goal of $47.38! It's still not too late to give by clicking the "Donate" button for the Santa Royale Rehabilitation Fund on the right side of this page.
Your donations go to a very worthy cause!
Every dollar will go to rehabilitate Santa Royale's lost souls: Tommy Beedie (REHABILITATED), Jill Black, Dan Smithers, Nola Wolvenson (REHABILITATED), Bonnie Johnson (REHABILITATED), Helen Clark and especially Wanders himself.
Yes, but, Wilbur... what would Mary do if she suddenly had a lot of time on her hands? Please don't take this away from her. Who knows what could happen.
Donate to Mary Worth and Me today and help save Mary's job! (Actually, I have no influence, but maybe I could write a letter to the editor about what is write and what is wrong. Ha ha. Get it? Write? It's a little wordplay.) Today is the last day of our fall fundraising campaign, and I do appreciate all the gifts that have been given. Thank you all very much!
Oh, Wilbur, nobody pays any attention to anything you say, so don't worry so much. You're just a buffoon of a fictional character, whose only two human qualities are that you like your daughter and love ham sandwiches.
Once again, it's fund raising week. And trust me. I'm not using the money to run off to Pax Wellness Resort and Spa.
How did this winner ever end up divorced?
Today's the final day of our spring fund raising campaign to support the Santa Royale Rehabilitation Fund. We haven't quite reached our goal of $3 million, but it's been a great campaign so far. Thanks to everyone who has helped put food on my table this week (franks are not cheap you know). If you haven't had a chance to give yet, please help me reach my goal!
(And just in case there was any question, the Santa Royale Rehabilitation Fund is not a real 501(c)3 charitable organization. In fact, it's not even a real organization. I make this point just in case the IRS doesn't have a sense of humor. Just in case.)
Beth is all about control. And if she can't control a bachelor, by gum, she can certainly control the food on her plate. "Asparagus greens! I command you to type my next novel! Type for me minions! Type for me!" And with a few lessons from Mary Worth, she may soon control an entire wing of Charterstone.
I want to thank each of you who have contributed so far to the Santa Royale Rehabilitation Fund spring campaign. Your generosity has really been quite startling and I am sincerely grateful. We are well on our way towards our goal of $3 million. (I can dream can't I?)
They both prefer paper! It's a match made in heaven. She's not very good looking, and he hates being a bachelor. Could this story get any more exciting?
Personal note: Charterstone has raised its rent, and your donations will keep this blog vibrant and active. Yes, folks, its time for our annual fund raising campaign. Please consider giving what you can to support the Santa Royale Rehabilitation Fund, to help rehabilitate folks like Elinor Kinley and Wanders. Your gift will also help us keep FREE secret messages free! Thank you!
The reader cried because the story had no ending, until he realized that it also had no plot.
The last story had a few overt references to Christianity ("The First Law" and quoting from the Gospel of Matthew), so lest we think Moy is stuffing her religion down our throats, she now changes gears and writes about an adulterous televangelist? 
Indeed.
Sheesh... the paper is completely blank! If you're going to write a three-month-long public service announcement, don't leave out the most critical piece of information. As I said, sheesh. Well, as my own little act of public service, I'll pick up where Mary Worth has dropped the ball. Click here to report phishing.