"Do we need to talk like alien robots? Because I'm really good at that."
7 comments:
KitKat
said...
November 30, 2020: Per a press release from the National Football League, Commissioner Roger Goodell announced that the league will replace its current drug-testing program with a revolutionary new protocol pioneered by Thomas “Tommy” Beedie. Beedie, a resident of Santa Royale,California, stated that his drug-testing program, which is wrapping up its highly successful beta testing at Freda’s Food Mart in Santa Royale, has gotten “rave reviews from the boss!” Beedie will appear at a press conference with Commissioner Goodell in the near future (the exact date is pending).
"Um, Tommy, we need to talk. Look, I'm no store manager, but any moron can see that your display is stupid. It's a lawsuit waiting to happen. And the store will lose that suit and go bankrupt. And then I'll be out of a job. So if I were you, I'd tell our nameless manager, 'Mr. Store Boss Chief, tear down that display.' "
I think you'd have to be on drugs to be proud of your ability to stack things when you are in your twenties. I believe stacking is one of those things kids practice in kindergarten. Plus, that stack of bottles (all of which appear to be leaning inwards) will go tumbling down the second someone bumps a cart into it or tries to take a bottle.
I do hope they are bottles of olive oil. That would be make an epic mess.
When your wife/girlfriend says: "we need to talk", it would not end well for you.me. It is not to tell you we need to increase the frequency of our sexual relations, or you need to watch more football or play more golf.
Tommy, you did buy some condoms using your employee discount, didn't you? Tommy, you suddenly don't look well. Are you alright?
7 comments:
November 30, 2020: Per a press release from the National Football League, Commissioner Roger Goodell announced that the league will replace its current drug-testing program with a revolutionary new protocol pioneered by Thomas “Tommy” Beedie. Beedie, a resident of Santa Royale,California, stated that his drug-testing program, which is wrapping up its highly successful beta testing at Freda’s Food Mart in Santa Royale, has gotten “rave reviews from the boss!” Beedie will appear at a press conference with Commissioner Goodell in the near future (the exact date is pending).
Today's Boredface Haiku is titled
"Takes Dumb To Know Dumb".
Praising.
Display.
Addicted, would I?
Um, talk...
@KitKat--Brilliant! You're on top of your game this morning.
"Um, Tommy, we need to talk. Look, I'm no store manager, but any moron can see that your display is stupid. It's a lawsuit waiting to happen. And the store will lose that suit and go bankrupt. And then I'll be out of a job. So if I were you, I'd tell our nameless manager, 'Mr. Store Boss Chief, tear down that display.' "
-- Scottie McW.
I think you'd have to be on drugs to be proud of your ability to stack things when you are in your twenties. I believe stacking is one of those things kids practice in kindergarten. Plus, that stack of bottles (all of which appear to be leaning inwards) will go tumbling down the second someone bumps a cart into it or tries to take a bottle.
I do hope they are bottles of olive oil. That would be make an epic mess.
When is Tommy going to sell something?!
When your wife/girlfriend says: "we need to talk", it would not end well for you.me. It is not to tell you we need to increase the frequency of our sexual relations, or you need to watch more football or play more golf.
Tommy, you did buy some condoms using your employee discount, didn't you? Tommy, you suddenly don't look well. Are you alright?
...and Brandy goes in for the kill...
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