Inspired by the sight of Drew giving a lollipop to a freckled moppet with an unfortunate hairstyle, Ashlee attempted to help an elderly woman cross the street. The indignant woman, Mary Worth, clobbered Ashlee with a bag of stale muffins, which bruised Ashlee’s head and broke her earrings, Ashlee is texting Drew from the Northview Hospital ER, requesting an additional seventy-five bucks for the copay.
Nance has been absent for some time. I hope she’s simply “taking a break,” in MW parlance, and is okay.
Wanders, I think you may have hit on something. While the rest of us were preparing for a drab epiphany, you saw it for what it was: Oh, I see he has a streak of compassion. How can I monetize that?
Text: "Uncle Arther, the big dope fell for it! Quick, buy two tickets for Vegas, we are going to par-tay!"
Next Text: "Drew, please ignore that last text! I sent it to the wrong person. The big dope I was referring to was another guy ... uh, you don't know him."
Final Text: "Now where is my #$%^ing five grand?! Don't make me ask again! Luv u, babe."
Are you stupid? Naïve? But still have a hankering for a medical degree? We have the answer! The Santa Royale Diploma Mill! Apply now! We accept PayPal.
Well, I think we now have the answer. Drew is always attracted to 'bad' girls. However, once they date him they reform (see Shauna and now, apparently, Ashlee). Of course, then Drew has no interest in them anymore. We can now look forward to the next train-wreck Drew will meet.
And all it took was Ashlee seeing one lollypop! I think her conversion required more of a trajectory than the sight of a tot being served a lollypop by the hapless Drew. Given Ashlee's history, I suspect Dr. Cory will arrive home to find his home ransacked and all the $$ he and dad had stashed under their respective mattresses gone...
14 comments:
"The nurse at the STD Clinic says you should call her."
"We have Mary Worth hostage and will need....One Million Dollars."
"Your car is going out of warranty--call me now for one last chance to save."
"Shauna and I are eloping."
"Drew... where r u? I need to c u, lover! Let's have dinner tonight! I luv u!"
Inspired by the sight of Drew giving a lollipop to a freckled moppet with an unfortunate hairstyle, Ashlee attempted to help an elderly woman cross the street. The indignant woman, Mary Worth, clobbered Ashlee with a bag of stale muffins, which bruised Ashlee’s head and broke her earrings, Ashlee is texting Drew from the Northview Hospital ER, requesting an additional seventy-five bucks for the copay.
Nance has been absent for some time. I hope she’s simply “taking a break,” in MW parlance, and is okay.
Then he notices a text from her: "My dad needs $5,000 too."
-- Scottie McW.
@KitKat -- Yeah, Nance's clever humor has certainly been missed.
Wanders, I think you may have hit on something. While the rest of us were preparing for a drab epiphany, you saw it for what it was: Oh, I see he has a streak of compassion. How can I monetize that?
Oh, let's hope it's not a positive pregnancy test for Ashlee!
Text: "Uncle Arther, the big dope fell for it! Quick, buy two tickets for Vegas, we are going to par-tay!"
Next Text: "Drew, please ignore that last text! I sent it to the wrong person. The big dope I was referring to was another guy ... uh, you don't know him."
Final Text: "Now where is my #$%^ing five grand?! Don't make me ask again! Luv u, babe."
Are you stupid? Naïve? But still have a hankering for a medical degree? We have the answer!
The Santa Royale Diploma Mill! Apply now! We accept PayPal.
Unfortunately that's far too imaginative for Moy.
WEDNESDAY
“Wow, congrats, babe! Since you got that great offer, can you PayPal me $1500 to cover my services for your modeling photo shoot?”
Drew should donate half of his salary to the People’s Clinic, which is crumbling before our eyes. The window in p. 1 is ready to fall out.
What? What kind of job? Who would hire her?
Well, I think we now have the answer. Drew is always attracted to 'bad' girls. However, once they date him they reform (see Shauna and now, apparently, Ashlee). Of course, then Drew has no interest in them anymore. We can now look forward to the next train-wreck Drew will meet.
And all it took was Ashlee seeing one lollypop! I think her conversion required more of a trajectory than the sight of a tot being served a lollypop by the hapless Drew. Given Ashlee's history, I suspect Dr. Cory will arrive home to find his home ransacked and all the $$ he and dad had stashed under their respective mattresses gone...
"I just got a great job offer out of town. I'll be slinging hash at Mel's Diner! Oh, and tell Shauna she can kiss my grits!"
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