Mr. Wanders, man of leisure! (I imagine you're still working a regular job.) Hope you are well, sir. I imagine your fans would enjoy your forays into karaoke more than Wilbur's, if you were so inclined.
Today we learn that both Mary and Estelle have multiple identical tops in different colors and that Estelle enjoys switching the frame on her mirror. Oh, those wacky girls!!
How nice of Mary to stop by and find out if Estelle is still with the good doctor. She knows first hand how much Wilbur is looking for an in.
Wanders, what a pleasant surprise! I miss my favorite one-eyed cat, and also you. Anytime you would like to stop by, you are most welcome to all the muffins, carrot cheesecake and pet treats you can possibly eat.
Oh No! I hadn't visited Mary Worth and Me for while - so sad you are (maybe) leaving . Glad things are going well - and thanks for all your free messages and playlists etc. YOU WILL BE MISSED!
So, a few possible manly stories Ed can use to explain his eyepatch. "I had to fight off a bunch of pirates who were trying to hijack a container ship at the port of Santa Royale."
"I stopped a gold ingot with my head just as a mob boss threw it at me."
"I was down at the racetrack with my latest formula one beauty, and a tire exploded that I had to throw myself on in order to save those around me."
„Speaking of which….“, uh oh, I don’t like the sound of that. What wrench is Mary throwing now? Wilbur wants to interview vets now? Maybe Estelle is behind on her rent? Mary want to work for Dr. Ed too (the better to spy…er, meddle effectively?
If we look at the past two strips, Mary's contribution to the conversation goes pretty much like this: "How's your vet friend? . . . Speaking of which, how do you like working alongside your vet friend?"
Estelle must know something. She‘s been holding that forkful of carrot cake for a long time but still hasn’t taken a bite. @Louise has pointed out…it is very orange.
Saint Mary does it again! All praise to Saint Mary! Estelle, kneel down and pray to Saint Mary, and thank her for all the gifts she has bestowed upon you.
That’s so funny and apt, @Thunderheels! Thanks for posting the link.
So Mary is proud she has helped, huh? Do those birds represent Estelle, Ed, and her? Maybe there was another bird representing Wilbur that crashed into a window and plummeted to its demise.
I think I have a new hobby for Mary. She can attend sporting events (Super Bowl, World Series, Olympics) and cheer on the teams. Later she can say she is proud to have helped the team win.
Here are a few quotes about Mary from big league athletes: “@#$&%!” “*&$#@%Mary Freakin’ Worth!”
If Odin didn’t get along with Libby and Pierre, Estelle and Ed would have to break up. Good news, lovebirds, you can shack up together. Will it be at Charterstone or in Ed’s tiny house?
Mary still hasn’t dropped the name of her dear friend Wilbur.
Thanks for mentioning the oddness of "animal retaliation." I remember wondering if that was a commonly thought-about thing, and then I realized where I was.
Vince
P.S. Hello, Wanders. I think I can speak for all of us in saying that we miss you.
Scottie and Vince, perhaps Animal Retaliation is related to Wilbur's (entirely justified) fear of being haunted by Feline Revenge.
For interested MWandMe readers and/or Wanders if he stops by, I recently came across this article reporting on the smoldering outrage Wilbur's undeath and musing about the phenomenon of dedicated "communities of snark" growing up around obscure strips like this.
It didn't mention this blog in particular (an even worse oversight than Ed's bad Yelp reviews!) but did include a brief interview with June Brigman and Karen Moy. As expected, Karen seemed entirely oblivious while June had this to say:
'' “It almost seems like there’s a little club of people that follow the strip. And maybe some of them are a little snarky.” Here she paused a little ruefully for a beat. “Well, actually, most of them are pretty snarky. But they enjoy the snark. And there’s almost like a little community of readers that follow the strip, and they comment on each other’s comments. And there is sort of a little community there.” ''
@Ian Cameron, PhD, that's quite an essay! Who knew Wilbur Weston could inspire so much analysis? Thank you for sharing this. I'm bemused by Karen Moy's comment that "[Wilbur] reveals people’s own personal foibles and weaknesses themselves. They see themselves in him, but they don’t want to.” Holy moly! KM just can't let the terminally clueless Wilbur go. This explains why she keeps dragging him back.
Wow! @Ian Cameron, Phd. and @KitKat: Thanks so much for your research. I am now feeling a little dirty...kinda grimy..that Moy thinks Wilbur represents anything about me. Yuk! But I gotta say, maybe it's not me...maybe it's her. Sorry, Karen. Maybe someone needs to talk to you. Have you called Dr. Sweatervest?
Perhaps the yoga-performing pets are a form of animal retaliation for the ridiculous way they are usually depicted. I can't decide if I appreciate JB's obvious gestures towards the absurdity of the Worthiverse or if I'm annoyed by them. Today I must say they are guffaw-worthy. And thanks so much for finding the Wilbur-bashing essay. THAT's a satisfying piece!
I'm a day late in responding to Ian Cameron PhD's message quoting Moy's nonsensical suggestion that Wilbur is Everyman, a Thurber-esque hapless schlemiel who reflects our deepest selves revealed in a funhouse mirror.
Either Moy is projecting her own weird self-image onto Wilbur and through him onto us, or she is really really trolling us.
And today June's joining in. I have visions of these two chugging ayahuasca together.
Yesterday June shows us Libby, Pierre, and Odin all doing synchronized yoga in a prone position, but today she won't show us the three animals all standing on one hind leg with their forelegs fully extended? Thanks for nothing, Brigman.
Well, now that Dr. Ed has owned up to being a widower, it's only fair that Estelle tell him all about Arther and Wilbur. I don't know what she should call them (affairs? boyfriends? People who were mean to her?) but doesn't she need to account for her past, too?
@Scottie, there's no bottom to the moronic in the Worthiverse. I suppose today's second panel could be a strong contender for POTY if the Worthy Awards arise like a phoenix.
Does anyone remember if Estelle is a widow? I have a distant recollection of that, but I could be wrong. Someone left her a lot of money and no responsibilities.
French bulldogs tend to be kind of ugly-cute, but there’s no cute about Pierre at all. He’s morphed into some kind of alien slug creature. And since we may never see another Worthy Awards show, I’m unilaterally declaring this as Panel Of The Year!
OMG! I was pondering why on earth Dr. Ed suddenly required an eyepatch for dramatic purposes (I know, I know, I’m pathetic).
Then I realized that if Estelle’s hair was bright red, she would look exactly like Brenda Starr- and Dr. Ed looks like Brenda’s inamorato, Basil St. John (although Basil’s eyepatch is usually over his left eye, it sometimes migrates to the right). Just google Brenda Starr, and then, if necessary, tell me I’m crazy.
Contact me through my attorneys, Dewey, Cheatham, and Howe. Namaste.
That's it! The three animals will frolic on Moron's Ledge and plunge to their synchronized deaths! Stell and her vet friend will blame each other. Wilbur, who witnessed the whole thing, will dish to Mary, and over eggplant cheesecake, Mary will advise Stell that her relationship with her vet friend is no longer tenable. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!
So...his last associate quit due to stress and overwork and his response is to overwork his new associate? And let his untrained, unpaid girlfriend work at the clinic too?
He doesn't seem to know how to run a business properly. And I'm saying this as someone who has never run a business.
Oh, what can that surprise be?! The surprise is that Jeff has decided to retire and would like Mary to join him in moving to a new condo on Catalina Island. Oh, never mind... It does sound like it's tim for Mary to retire, though, now that she has Stell spouting bromides like "most things work out with will and time." Ick.
I was kidding about Jeff inviting Mary to share a condo with him, but it looks like there's room for SEVERAL of the denizens of the Worthiverse on that vessel...
Wow! This is quite a surprise! Mary is willing to go on a cruise with Jeff? Maybe there are separate state rooms? Also, does Jeff know how to "drive" that thing? Are we going to have a ship wreck in our future?
I know Moy is teasing us...but it is kind of exciting to think about. I wonder if there will be a tiki bar on the island they land on like Wilbur had?
I propose the SS Unita del MaryandJeff as an alternate location for the next Charterstone party. Homemade (in a ship’s galley) hors d’oeuvres and Speedos will be included, and we’ll have fun, fun, fun until- BAM! We’ll then find out what kind of stuff the Charterstonians are made of.
Jeff: Surprise, Mary!
Mary: Try the chicken salad appetizers, everyone- they’re barely wet.
Ian: Och, nae, Ah spilled mah wee bevy!
Toby: (Oh, I hope Ian doesn’t drown before he’s fully vested in his SRJC pension!)
Dawn: Reminds me of Jared- wet and boring.
Saul and Eve: Greta, Max, where are you?
Iris and Zak, aboard their mega yacht, the SS Bezos Jr: Oh, I say, darling, look at those poor people falling off their rowboat. Should I phone the Coast Guard or just let natural selection take its course?
Mr. Allora: Don’t worry, everyone, I’ll be back in a jiffy with the hand truck (mwahhahaha, swimming strongly and rapidly away)
Wilbur: Help, help! Save me, SAVE ME!
Dockmaster: Calm down, folks, you’re still at the dock- water’s only four feet deep here. Just wade over to the ladder there.
Insurance adjuster: Sorry Doc, you’re not covered if there are more than four people on your boat.
Greta and Max: Yapyapyapyapyap Woofwoofwoofwoofwoof
Wouldn't we love to see Greta and Max square off against Pierre, Libby, and Odin in a snarling, fur-ripping death match? Stelle's vet friend would be up to his elbows in gore.
A boat that size cannot be piloted without a Captain and a crew. I can't wait to see Jeff donning his Captain's hat (he found Hugh Hefner's old hat on Ebay) and introducing Mary to his crew of "play" mates (he got them from Ebabe).
Hilarious comments above, everyone! I love the way you reunited that boatload of Worthiverse characters, @meg. That would outdo any pool party.
@Scottie, a pet rumble like that might even bring Wanders back. Unfortunately, the clueless KM would probably have them frolicking together, and JB would show them all smiling (egad).
Wednesday: With Mary “driving,” you might get your get your wish to not wake up.
So, I see the "surprise" is that Jeff is retiring and has bought a boat that will ferry passengers around the Channel Islands. Happily, no animals are allowed on the islands. Mary will be employed to provide muffins for unsuspecting passengers. Except when Jeff brings this plan up, she breaks his heart again..
I’m shocked that Jeff remembers anything about Wilbur, let alone Estelle and her veterinarian. Doesn’t his brain stop paying attention to Mary when she mentions anyone in her Charterstone circle? (This includes any animals.)
Friday Jeff’s remark “Any man would be unlike Wilbur!” is open to MANY interpretations. Please discuss, Jeff. You usually act befuddled by Mary’s circle of oddballs.
Thank goodness Mary was there to remind Jeff that Stell used to date Wilbur.
Steve@11:15 pm: It is my belief that Mr. Allora secretly despises the residents of Charterstone. I’m always hoping for a story where he unleashes the wrath of his leaf blower upon them.
You can tell that Jeff got one of those super-expensive luxury yachts. They have the portholes that move up and down like the dancing dots you see when you're receiving a text response.
@Meg: Well, the coronation did strike me as overblown and tasteless. Does that count? Also, Charles ignored Harry pretty much completely; not too unlike Wilbur ignoring Dawn.
KitKat- well, whatever Jeff is eating, it’s made ‘the gray go away.’ No, I mean his hair, not Mary. (although eating sardines would mean Jeff would get even less sweet, sweet lovin’ from Mary.)
I think I hear a new story calling. Will it be a troubled waitress in the Bum Boat? Will there be yet another marriage proposal for Mary to swat at? Will the surf and turf finally catch up to Dr. Jeff and we will discover that Mary never bothered to learn CPR or carry her cell phone or memorize 9-1-1? Oh, I can hardly wait.
I hereby swear on a stack of gray books (widely available in Charterstone condos and SRJC academic offices) that when Dawn came to live with Wilbur, it was because her mom had died.
However, when I attempted to find a character description of Dawn which mentions it… I fell down the google rabbit hole. Google mary Worth characters, and you will get hundreds of hits!
Lots and lots of serious scholarly articles, plenty of snarky articles, even a full diary on The Daily Kos, where I am a regular… where, oh where, was I on March 25, 2022?…. So if you must have absolute proof of Wilbur’s divorced widowhood, you may be doomed to disappointment. Sorry not sorry. Meg
Tuesday Is that Jerry, formerly of Jerry’s Sandwich Shop? I don’t know if this is the Bum Boat, but the surf and turf turns out to be clam chowder and strip steak. (I bet it’s Manhattan clam chowder - bleah.)
So the old familiars know what they like and get their usuals (yawn). Mary takes some of her dinner home to make salmon squares for the pool parties we never see anymore.
Hey Meg: I have a subscription to a website that has newspaper archives, and I went down a road a while back finding the strips where Dawn first appeared (1993.) Her mother was alive at the time. It's possible she died later on. I posted some of them in a thread in the Readers of the Comics Curmudgeon group on Facebook.
I really think Jeff is taking his life in a new direction. First that fancy boat (he keeps mentioning needing an "upgrade", (code for time to get with someone new in his life?) and then at dinner, he goes for clam chowder and strip steak instead of his "go to" surf and turf. What's next? The possibilities are endless, and all because he voyeuristically checked in on the current state of Estelle and Wilbur.
Thank you for checking. I subscribe, but I couldn’t seem to get to 1993.
My recollection is that Wilbur was telling Mary (duh! Who else would he tell?) that his ex had died sometime after Dawn came to live with him. And surely, the Weston clan being so warm and close and normal and all, Dawn would have gone back to visit dear old Connecticut society mom at some point. Or a there would have been a call from the ex complaining about the alimony check being late.
Note to self: Quit discussing comic characters as though they are real, or The Others will think I am nuts. I also think I remember discussion of why he and the ex split up- something to do with tuxedos and bridge and dessert forks… Woops, must go, here comes Big Nurse with my noon meds.
Well, I keep hoping for something exciting...maybe a person of color in an actual story line? I don't recall seeing Jerry before, maybe it is finally his turn for some drama and muffins.
@Meg. Heavens, don't apologize. It way too much fun to speculate.
While clam chowder, provided it is the New England variety, is very nice indeed, I don’t consider it a component of surf and turf. We’re talking lobster, or at the very least, jumbo shrimp. And I’ll have the filet. Medium rare, thank you, with a baked potato, butter, not sour cream. (Imagination is a wonderful thing…none of that is going to happen in my real life.)
Strangely enough, Jerry the Waiter closely resembles the most recent iteration of Mr. Allora on 5/2/18, MW 2876. Mr. Allora looked completely different on July 5, 2016, when he was slim, clean-shaven and pale. Incidentally, that is the infamous episode where he callously delivered the hand truck to Tommy-writhing-on-the-floor-Beedie.
Thank goodness I have a hobby like this to keep me from wasting my time.
Jeff is trying to convince himself that he and Mary actually HAVE a relationship, so it's easy to get all judgy on others. Glad to see Mary is setting him straight.
Does Mary know this couple, or is she calling on her meddler’s spidey-sense? I know I’m being overly optimistic, but could they be—gasp—Brand New Characters?
Mary: "Jeff, I am the meddler, don't step on my territory. I will find a reason to interfere on my own." Jeff: "Yes, dear, please forgive me. Date night same time next year?"
Hmm.. it appears the BumBoat has become a submarine, and we are watching Mary and Jeff from several fathoms down. Good thing I'm wearing my SCUBA gear, especially because this dialogue oought to be deep sixed.
I'm starting to think that Moy doesn't actually know where the strip is going. She's stalling for time while she reads our comments and tries to decide which ideas have merit.
Ha ha....we all know Moy would never care about what we think. At the very least, Wilbur would be dead if she did.
Later tonight, the BumBoat will offer entertainment! Tonight’s show features Wilbur the Karaoke Ventriloquist, with Madame Wendy, the Country Contralto. Give it up for this wacky pair as they harmonize on ‘Smoke, smoke, smoke that cigarette’.
I'm having withdrawals! HELP!!! PLEASE, throw us a bone once in a while! I miss you Mr.Wanders and KitKat too!! Mary worth is not WORTH reading any more without your humorous commentary.
Saturday I’m still here! It’s just that this week’s storyline (a way-too-grand description of this dreck) has worn me down. Considering how Mary has slapped Jeff down, maybe she’s getting a wee bit tired of him after all. This would be a great time for the reappearance of; 1. John Dill! 2. Ted Miller! (what a character!) 3. Aldo Kelrast!
I wonder why it took Jeff so long to admit that Mary was right. Obviously, Moy is dragging this out for as long as she can. Mary is always right and Jeff has know it for decades.
Monday I guess it was only a matter of time: “Dogs are Good!” Chapter 17. Let’s hope we have strong stomachs. (We can hope that volunteer receptionist Estelle makes a life-altering mistake at Animal Hospital, where the other employees are invisible.)
I'm wondering how someone "reciprocates with neutral expressions". Mary sounds like some sort of social science researcher, judging someone's gestures "neutral". Plus, if Jeff is making assumptions, so is she. The other diners could be murderers on the lam, planning their next move instead of a couple on a date night, escaping rowdy kids.. Regardless, Jeff has been properly chastised and figured out a smooth way to get Mary to shut up...
I really hope this doesn't turn out to be a dead Max or Greta story. I don't think I could handle it. I'm still trying to come to grips with losing Wanders.
TUESDAY @hmmm, what you mentioned yesterday may be on the horizon, what with Saul rhapsodizing about being blessed with his darling Greta. (Does Saul remember the late Bella?) That white shepherd (?) might crash into their path, for instance.
I’m still coming to grips with the absence of Wanders too, not to mention the lack of HelenClark’s bracingly hilarious comments, and so many others [sigh].
The dog park's not crowded today. They all saw Old Man Wynter coming and bolted. That brown sweater he wears in the heat hasn't been cleaned since the Carter administration, and it reeks.
Perhaps Eve and Saul are destined to marry since they enjoy each others company, but don't talk to each other? Well, that's not strictly true: they do affirm that dogs are good.
This summer coming to a comic strip near you: DOGS ARE GOOD: The Return Get ready for an elderly love story steeped in canine antics. See Saul walk Greta. See Eva at the vet's office. See them run into each other. Rated B for boring. Not suitable for any audience with an IQ above three.
Please stop reading here if you feel at all queasy: I predict that the next storyette, since we know that Greta is the daughter Saul never had, that Pierre and Greta will soon present Saul with the granddog he’s also never had, a critter with short forelegs and four short legs.
The suspense here is so thick, I could cut it with a (butter) knife. Is Saul training Greta for a life of theft? Will Greta choke on that ball she just retrieved and have to be rushed to Dr. Ed's (who we know is expert in the removal of such balls)? Will that fellow who threw a ball for his dog the other day turn out to be of unsavory character and grab Greta? Where is a Disney movie scriptwriter when you need one?
meg, I was chortling!! Especially loved your Apollo 13 version..And in a tribute to MW's soap opera history, I suspect some bad health news for Eve's dog that will necessitate a good deal of melodrama. Since I hear the soaps only have a limited amount of scripts "in the can", perhaps KM IS auditioning for a writer's position on "General Hospital" but with a veterinary twist..
Well, it’s quite apparent why Greta has ‘disappeared’. With her super keen hearing, Greta heard Eve tell Saul to give her (Greta) a kiss. Would anyone EVER want to get kissed by Saul? He had herring cream cheese on a garlic bagel for breakfast, and he chews Beechnut gum all day long.
Golem rampages through Santa Royale park! Women and children flee in panic, dogs and cats scatter, rabbits faint. Men pretend not to notice, while perusing the Daily Racing Form.
Oh my! That blue van WWHOOOSSHHing away with a whimpering Greta is even more beat up than Jared’s jalopy. It must be driving to somewhere with cracked plaster on the walls, like we’ve come to expect from Ashlee or Arthur or Tommy’s friend Vin. Surely only a true cracked-plaster lowlife would dognap such a saintly wienerdog.
Or maybe it’s the tombstone salesman, down on his luck and needing another massive order.
And so begins the rehabilitation arc for Wilbur Weston…
Using his knowledge of, and contacts deep within the karaoke and ‘journalism’ worlds, Wilbur quickly realizes that a flamboyant karaoke performer is hoping to acquire an elaborate greatcoat made from -(avert your eyes, boys and girls- dachshund FUR!- in order to present the 101 Dachshunds song in a competition at Burning Man. Without revealing too much, I can tell you that Wilbur does catch up with the evildoer and rescues Greta. He then presents an exclusive podcast of “She Shouldn’t be Alive, but She Is!” Let’s listen in:
‘Greta, when did you realize you might be in trouble?’ WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF! ‘And what did you do then?’ whimper, whimper, whimper….
Tune in to Wilbur’s podcast for the rest of the details, including commentary from Saul Wynter. I have too many tears in my eyes to continue… .
I'm guessing there is a dognapping ring that has been scoping out canines at the park for several weeks. A sure sign of a well-treated dog is the matching outfit worn by said dog and owner (bow ties for Saul and Greta, scarves for Eve and Max). No point taking a dog who is not as well loved and cared for. Cue the friendly police officer, who will provide a lecture on not taking your eyes off your dog at the dog park..
I have a thought. In case there are those of you with less trivia-obsessed brains than mine (likely everyone) haven’t heard, there is a new Oscar Mayer story. The Wienermobile will henceforth be known as the FRANKMOBILE! (because, snicker).
Perhaps there is soon to be a giant event (in Santa Royale) featuring the Frankmobile, and hundreds, nay, thousands of wiener dogs are to appear en masse. ‘Twill go viral, worldwide; the sight of those woofing and yapping four-legged frankfurters will create a sensational demand for hot dogs. Unfortunately the Hollywood agency charged with recruiting and hiring said animals has discovered that it’s much easier to just borrow the dogs from parks. I hope Greta is ready for her closeup.
Haven’t we seen ‘helpful young woman’ before? Wasn’t she harmed by a boyfriend and Jared became her ‘friend’? This could end up being a really complicated plot.
I notice the Worthiverse doesn't seem to have any cops. Plenty of crime--muggings, stalkers (Aldo Kelrast), theft (Toby's purse, romance scams) but never any police to investigate. And now poor old Saul has to go door to door to inquire about his missing dog. In fact, there doesn't seem to be any government at all in Santa Royale.. Wonder how they get their trash picked up...
@LouiseF, the last police officer (maybe the ONLY one) was Scott Fletcher (I may have the wrong surname - it’s been a looonnnggg time), who married Adrian, Jeff’s daughter). Santa Royale exists in its own peculiar bubble in another dimension. We need Rod Serling to beam himself in to offer commentary.
How could Saul overlook adding “And she was wearing a bow tie exactly like mine!”?
If Mary is also going door to door, does she have a basket of muffins with her?
Not a comment about the comic, but has anyone else had Malwarebytes or another filter block this site? It said it was blocked due to Malicious content. Or is merely having Mary on the site enough to constitute malice. Thanks all.
Eve's dog (I forgot the name) looks incredibly sad. I hope he/she feels better soon. And what magic adhesive makes a poster stick to tree bark? I need some of that at home.
So KitKat, I fear the muffin-batter-as-adhesive plan won't work since the presence of anything muffin will surely drive potential poster watchers away, even with a reward.
Mary looks embarrassed as she drives the human bullhorn around town (it’s about dern time something embarrassed her).
I’ve been wondering about “Papa.” Does Saul pronounce it like Madonna (Papa, don’t preach), or like some snooty English aristocrat ( pa-PA, where are you and ma-Ma going this evening?) ? My husband just asked why I’m saying Papa and pa-Pa over and over as I curate my Cheech & Chong LPs.
@meg, if Greta could sing (and let’s hope she can’t), she would warble that Eddie Fisher classic “Oh My Papa.” Eddie accented the second syllable. If Greta was an English bulldog, Saul would refer to himself as “pater.”
@KitKat, I figured no one but me remembered Eddie Fisher and that song! The line wouldn’t have scanned properly if he had said papa!
My sad prediction for the endgame of VanMan and Greta. A very large python in an adjacent cage will have a snack-shaped bulge, and he’ll be wearing a satisfied smile… and a polka dot bowtie. Let’s see Mary spin that one!
A disturbing and as yet unexplained occurrence was reported to SRPD last evening. A carful of elderly people and a dog were driving slowly on downtown streets, shouting odd comments at passersby. The meaning of “Greta, where are you? and Papa loves you” could not be determined, but police are dismissing it as a senior prank.
And isn't that just like our darling, thoughtful, Karen Moy? We can always count on her to provide us with a brief respite from the cares of this world. Thank you, dear.
I for one am not worried. Like any good James Bond villain, our curly-haired mastermind is indulging in entirely too much gloating and chortling than is wise in the notoriously cutthroat Santa Royale underground dogfight circuit. Another few weeks of this hemming and HAWing will give time for the combined powers of St Thomas Aquinas quotes and Lost Dog posters to do their work.
"I think I'll call you Noodle cause you look like one! HAW HAW HAW!" "Or maybe I should call you Snack! HAW HAW HAW" "Or maybe I should call you Maruchan, after the popular instant ramen that's a noodle and snack at the same time! HAW HAW HAW"
I HATE THIS!!! Sorry, But I can’t bear anything about cruelty to animals. I ma check out for a while. Even a Wilbur storyline would have been preferable.
202 comments:
1 – 200 of 202 Newer› Newest»Mr. Wanders, man of leisure! (I imagine you're still working a regular job.) Hope you are well, sir. I imagine your fans would enjoy your forays into karaoke more than Wilbur's, if you were so inclined.
What a welcome surprise! I hope you’re enjoying life and that it’s continuing to treat you well, Wanders. Best regards to Mrs. Wanders too.
Today’s recycling is KM’s homage to Earth Day, four days late.
Hi Wanders!! Nice to read you!!
Today we learn that both Mary and Estelle have multiple identical tops in different colors and that Estelle enjoys switching the frame on her mirror. Oh, those wacky girls!!
How nice of Mary to stop by and find out if Estelle is still with the good doctor. She knows first hand how much Wilbur is looking for an in.
Wanders, what a pleasant surprise! I miss my favorite one-eyed cat, and also you. Anytime you would like to stop by, you are most welcome to all the muffins, carrot cheesecake and pet treats you can possibly eat.
Oh No! I hadn't visited Mary Worth and Me for while - so sad you are (maybe) leaving . Glad things are going well - and thanks for all your free messages and playlists etc. YOU WILL BE MISSED!
Now only the dog and cat switched fur colors....
Only a temporary eyepatch? A permanent one would bolster Ed’s macho vibe.
Mary: “Speaking of animal retaliation, I’ve spent time with Wilbur lately, and….”
Stell: Ed and Libby have matching eye patches, it's adorable. I've taken over spaying the cats now that Ed's in therapy all day!
Mary: Oh, wonderful. Wilbur Weston has adopted a hyena he wants spayed.
Annie
So, a few possible manly stories Ed can use to explain his eyepatch. "I had to fight off a bunch of pirates who were trying to hijack a container ship at the port of Santa Royale."
"I stopped a gold ingot with my head just as a mob boss threw it at me."
"I was down at the racetrack with my latest formula one beauty, and a tire exploded that I had to throw myself on in order to save those around me."
Mary just whips "animal retaliation" off the top of her head. Has anyone ever said that phrase in real life?
-- Scottie
So great to hear from you, Wanders! Glad that all is well with you & the family!
Unlike that slob Mary, Estelle doesn't allow eating on her couch.
„Speaking of which….“, uh oh, I don’t like the sound of that. What wrench is Mary throwing now? Wilbur wants to interview vets now? Maybe Estelle is behind on her rent? Mary want to work for Dr. Ed too (the better to spy…er, meddle effectively?
Made my day, I can tell you.
THURSDAY
If we look at the past two strips, Mary's contribution to the conversation goes pretty much like this: "How's your vet friend? . . . Speaking of which, how do you like working alongside your vet friend?"
-- Scottie
Ho hum.. There must be a lot of carrot in that cheesecake for it to look so orange. Oh, are these two talking?! I must have nodded off.
What happened to Mary's interrupted thought from yesterday? Come on, Moy finish it!
Estelle must know something. She‘s been holding that forkful of carrot cake for a long time but still hasn’t taken a bite. @Louise has pointed out…it is very orange.
Mary’s tap dancing for time as she prepares to work Wilbur into the conversation. Stand by for a howler of a non sequitur, folks.
Mary maneuvering to be asked to serve as the maid of honor at the probable wedding!
FRIDAY
Saint Mary does it again! All praise to Saint Mary! Estelle, kneel down and pray to Saint Mary, and thank her for all the gifts she has bestowed upon you.
[gag]
-- Scottie
https://www.gocomics.com/lastkiss/2023/04/28
I saw this while drinking coffee this morning.
That’s so funny and apt, @Thunderheels! Thanks for posting the link.
So Mary is proud she has helped, huh? Do those birds represent Estelle, Ed, and her? Maybe there was another bird representing Wilbur that crashed into a window and plummeted to its demise.
I think I have a new hobby for Mary. She can attend sporting events (Super Bowl, World Series, Olympics) and cheer on the teams. Later she can say she is proud to have helped the team win.
Here are a few quotes about Mary from big league athletes: “@#$&%!” “*&$#@%Mary Freakin’ Worth!”
SATURDAY
"Don't be scared of making plans. Things are looking up for you, Stell! . . . For now. BWAAAHAAAAAHAAAA!!!"
-- Scottie
If Odin didn’t get along with Libby and Pierre, Estelle and Ed would have to break up. Good news, lovebirds, you can shack up together. Will it be at Charterstone or in Ed’s tiny house?
Mary still hasn’t dropped the name of her dear friend Wilbur.
Scottie,
Thanks for mentioning the oddness of "animal retaliation." I remember wondering if that was a commonly thought-about thing, and then I realized where I was.
Vince
P.S. Hello, Wanders. I think I can speak for all of us in saying that we miss you.
Scottie and Vince, perhaps Animal Retaliation is related to Wilbur's (entirely justified) fear of being haunted by Feline Revenge.
For interested MWandMe readers and/or Wanders if he stops by, I recently came across this article reporting on the smoldering outrage Wilbur's undeath and musing about the phenomenon of dedicated "communities of snark" growing up around obscure strips like this.
It didn't mention this blog in particular (an even worse oversight than Ed's bad Yelp reviews!) but did include a brief interview with June Brigman and Karen Moy. As expected, Karen seemed entirely oblivious while June had this to say:
''
“It almost seems like there’s a little club of people that follow the strip. And maybe some of them are a little snarky.” Here she paused a little ruefully for a beat. “Well, actually, most of them are pretty snarky. But they enjoy the snark. And there’s almost like a little community of readers that follow the strip, and they comment on each other’s comments. And there is sort of a little community there.”
''
https://www.tcj.com/the-strange-second-life-of-legacy-comic-strips-or-i-want-wilbur-weston-dead/
@Ian Cameron, PhD, that's quite an essay! Who knew Wilbur Weston could inspire so much analysis? Thank you for sharing this. I'm bemused by Karen Moy's comment that "[Wilbur] reveals people’s own personal foibles and weaknesses themselves. They see themselves in him, but they don’t want to.” Holy moly! KM just can't let the terminally clueless Wilbur go. This explains why she keeps dragging him back.
Wow! @Ian Cameron, Phd. and @KitKat: Thanks so much for your research. I am now feeling a little dirty...kinda grimy..that Moy thinks Wilbur represents anything about me. Yuk! But I gotta say, maybe it's not me...maybe it's her. Sorry, Karen. Maybe someone needs to talk to you. Have you called Dr. Sweatervest?
MONDAY
Okay, that's it! The three animals doing synchronized yoga has pushed me over the edge. I need to flush my brain. Move over, Wandses.
Meanwhile, June giggles while trolling us.
-- Scottie
Monday, May 1
All right, June’s pranking us today with Odin, Libby, and Pierre doing yoga alongside their wacky humans. I hope Wanders sees this.
Estelle makes her opening bid in moving in with Ed. “You have a lovely house with lots of space! My piano will fit right in!”
Why is Ed wearing sunglasses? Is he staring at a skylight?
Oops, I just remembered Ed’s animal-retaliation episode. That’s an eyepatch. [Insert pirate witticism here.]
Tomorrow we'll see the five of them at Estelle's therapist. Estelle and Ed on two regular couches, next to the three little pigs on pet sized couches.
Perhaps the yoga-performing pets are a form of animal retaliation for the ridiculous way they are usually depicted. I can't decide if I appreciate JB's obvious gestures towards the absurdity of the Worthiverse or if I'm annoyed by them. Today I must say they are guffaw-worthy. And thanks so much for finding the Wilbur-bashing essay. THAT's a satisfying piece!
I'm a day late in responding to Ian Cameron PhD's message quoting Moy's nonsensical suggestion that Wilbur is Everyman, a Thurber-esque hapless schlemiel who reflects our deepest selves revealed in a funhouse mirror.
Either Moy is projecting her own weird self-image onto Wilbur and through him onto us, or she is really really trolling us.
And today June's joining in. I have visions of these two chugging ayahuasca together.
Quite disturbing.
Annie
TUESDAY
Yesterday June shows us Libby, Pierre, and Odin all doing synchronized yoga in a prone position, but today she won't show us the three animals all standing on one hind leg with their forelegs fully extended? Thanks for nothing, Brigman.
-- Scottie
Yoga sessions aren’t supposed to be gabfests [grumble].
Not even a “!” from Estelle at Ed’s mention of the late Mrs. Harding?
I get the impression this is the first time Dr. Harding has brought up the late Mrs. H. It sure takes a lot to pry info. out of this guy...
This eye patch thing is ridiculous!
When does Wilbur pop up and start looking at them through the window?
Wilbur will come there in disguise.
Ring-ring!
Who’s there?
Candygram!
……………
Landshark!
Well, now that Dr. Ed has owned up to being a widower, it's only fair that Estelle tell him all about Arther and Wilbur. I don't know what she should call them (affairs? boyfriends? People who were mean to her?) but doesn't she need to account for her past, too?
WEDNESDAY
Can this strip possibly get any more moronic?
Stay tuned and watch it happen.
-- Scottie
Remember how a while back Wanders erringly posted a panel from a week in advance? I suspect he saw this idiocy coming and that's why he bailed.
Puh-leeze!
The only possible explanation I can come up with for the idea these pets are posing in "prayer" position involves taxidermy.
@Scottie, there's no bottom to the moronic in the Worthiverse. I suppose today's second panel could be a strong contender for POTY if the Worthy Awards arise like a phoenix.
Does anyone remember if Estelle is a widow? I have a distant recollection of that, but I could be wrong. Someone left her a lot of money and no responsibilities.
French bulldogs tend to be kind of ugly-cute, but there’s no cute about Pierre at all. He’s morphed into some kind of alien slug creature. And since we may never see another Worthy Awards show, I’m unilaterally declaring this as Panel Of The Year!
That "eye patch" that Dr Ed is sporting is pretty poorly rendered.
@fauxprof
"Alien slug creature"! Ha ha haaaaa!
-- Scottie
Dr. Ed appears to have his eye patch affixed somehow under his toupee..
Props to @fauxprof for describing Pierre as “some kind of alien slug creature” - perfect!
Ed has no clean towels, so he’s using Estelle’s scarf to wipe his face while she uses a dishcloth. Naked yoga might be just around the corner.
OMG! I was pondering why on earth Dr. Ed suddenly required an eyepatch for dramatic purposes (I know, I know, I’m pathetic).
Then I realized that if Estelle’s hair was bright red, she would look exactly like Brenda Starr- and Dr. Ed looks like Brenda’s inamorato, Basil St. John (although Basil’s eyepatch is usually over his left eye, it sometimes migrates to the right).
Just google Brenda Starr, and then, if necessary, tell me I’m crazy.
Contact me through my attorneys, Dewey, Cheatham, and Howe. Namaste.
Yes, they are my attorneys also. My dental practice is Doctors Moore, Payne and Hurt
FRIDAY
"My eye doc is fine. So's my cardiologist. Why do you ask?"
-- Scottie
Ed’s pretty canny. He fired his receptionist and Estelle’s doing the job for free. No wonder he likes coming in more every day.
Inquiring minds want to know the particulars of the death of the late Mrs. Harding. Ed could be Dr. Bluebeard.
Estelle lost her nose in panel 2.
Is there any reason to hope that they are hiking to Piccadee Falls? Maybe…just maybe…they will find Zak’s phone!
@meg
That's it! The three animals will frolic on Moron's Ledge and plunge to their synchronized deaths! Stell and her vet friend will blame each other. Wilbur, who witnessed the whole thing, will dish to Mary, and over eggplant cheesecake, Mary will advise Stell that her relationship with her vet friend is no longer tenable. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!
-- Scottie
SUNDAY
Did Estelle stop herself just in time before blurting out "Most things work out with Will (bur)"?
-- Toytuba
SUNDAY
Estelle and Ed should get cited for walking with unleashed animals.
Wait...how about the five of them taking a long walk off a short pier?
So...his last associate quit due to stress and overwork and his response is to overwork his new associate? And let his untrained, unpaid girlfriend work at the clinic too?
He doesn't seem to know how to run a business properly. And I'm saying this as someone who has never run a business.
MONDAY
Sound... like a plan? Sound like Mary went a little heavy on the Fixodent today.
Mary can't wait to show Jeff her new tongue stud.
-- Scottie McW.
Jeff has a surprise for her. He wants to introduce his new bride. “You know Dawn, don’t you?”
Oh, what can that surprise be?! The surprise is that Jeff has decided to retire and would like Mary to join him in moving to a new condo on Catalina Island. Oh, never mind... It does sound like it's tim for Mary to retire, though, now that she has Stell spouting bromides like "most things work out with will and time." Ick.
@ fauxprof, Dawn would be good or how about Ashlee, haha!
TUESDAY
Picture Wilbur taking a dive off that one!
Why does Jeff dock his watercraft in deserted locations, with no one else around other than Mary?
"Oh, Jeff, I'm so embarrassed for you."
-- Scottie
I was kidding about Jeff inviting Mary to share a condo with him, but it looks like there's room for SEVERAL of the denizens of the Worthiverse on that vessel...
Wow! This is quite a surprise! Mary is willing to go on a cruise with Jeff? Maybe there are separate state rooms? Also, does Jeff know how to "drive" that thing? Are we going to have a ship wreck in our future?
I know Moy is teasing us...but it is kind of exciting to think about. I wonder if there will be a tiki bar on the island they land on like Wilbur had?
I propose the SS Unita del MaryandJeff as an alternate location for the next Charterstone party. Homemade (in a ship’s galley) hors d’oeuvres and Speedos will be included, and we’ll have fun, fun, fun until- BAM! We’ll then find out what kind of stuff the Charterstonians are made of.
Jeff: Surprise, Mary!
Mary: Try the chicken salad appetizers, everyone- they’re barely wet.
Ian: Och, nae, Ah spilled mah wee bevy!
Toby: (Oh, I hope Ian doesn’t drown before he’s fully vested in his SRJC pension!)
Dawn: Reminds me of Jared- wet and boring.
Saul and Eve: Greta, Max, where are you?
Iris and Zak, aboard their mega yacht, the SS Bezos Jr: Oh, I say, darling, look at those poor people falling off their rowboat.
Should I phone the Coast Guard or just let natural selection take its course?
Mr. Allora: Don’t worry, everyone, I’ll be back in a jiffy with the hand truck (mwahhahaha, swimming strongly and rapidly away)
Wilbur: Help, help! Save me, SAVE ME!
Dockmaster: Calm down, folks, you’re still at the dock- water’s only four feet deep here. Just wade over to the ladder there.
Insurance adjuster: Sorry Doc, you’re not covered if there are more than four people on your boat.
Greta and Max: Yapyapyapyapyap Woofwoofwoofwoofwoof
@meg
Wouldn't we love to see Greta and Max square off against Pierre, Libby, and Odin in a snarling, fur-ripping death match? Stelle's vet friend would be up to his elbows in gore.
-- Scottie
A boat that size cannot be piloted without a Captain and a crew. I can't wait to see Jeff donning his Captain's hat (he found Hugh Hefner's old hat on Ebay) and introducing Mary to his crew of "play" mates (he got them from Ebabe).
To Jeff, he’s a captain, to Mary, he’s a captain, to a captain…he’s no captain.
Hilarious comments above, everyone! I love the way you reunited that boatload of Worthiverse characters, @meg. That would outdo any pool party.
@Scottie, a pet rumble like that might even bring Wanders back. Unfortunately, the clueless KM would probably have them frolicking together, and JB would show them all smiling (egad).
Wednesday: With Mary “driving,” you might get your get your wish to not wake up.
So, I see the "surprise" is that Jeff is retiring and has bought a boat that will ferry passengers around the Channel Islands. Happily, no animals are allowed on the islands. Mary will be employed to provide muffins for unsuspecting passengers. Except when Jeff brings this plan up, she breaks his heart again..
And, given the size of that boat, Jeff better put both hands on the steering wheel, instead of showing off how he can hug Mary and drive...
Jeff's looking pretty glassy eyed, hopefully he is letting Mary help steer his giant yacht.
"Look at those dolphins, Mary! Let's see if I can run 'em down!"
-- Scottie
Is that the sun or the moon in panel one?
I’m shocked that Jeff remembers anything about Wilbur, let alone Estelle and her veterinarian. Doesn’t his brain stop paying attention to Mary when she mentions anyone in her Charterstone circle? (This includes any animals.)
This is why May continues to see Jeff. He knows how to cue her to start in with the gossip. Now for a week of reviewing Wilbur's foibles!
Jeff does his best to stay out of the loop. To this day, he can’t always recognize Ian and Toby.
Meg. Thanks for the shout out to Mr. Allora and his hand truck. As I recall, his failure to provide it led to Tommy's back injury
Friday
Jeff’s remark “Any man would be unlike Wilbur!” is open to MANY interpretations. Please discuss, Jeff. You usually act befuddled by Mary’s circle of oddballs.
For Jeff, that amounts to a sick burn!
Oh, for a minute there I thought we might be warming up to another marriage proposal. But no...now we are on to Wilbur again.
Thank goodness Mary was there to remind Jeff that Stell used to date Wilbur.
Steve@11:15 pm: It is my belief that Mr. Allora secretly despises the residents of Charterstone. I’m always hoping for a story where he unleashes the wrath of his leaf blower upon them.
You can tell that Jeff got one of those super-expensive luxury yachts. They have the portholes that move up and down like the dancing dots you see when you're receiving a text response.
-- Scottie
After all this time, why is Jeff so focused on Wilbur? That’s so peculiar. What’s going on?
@meg, we would all cheer to see Mr. Allora unleash the wrath of his leaf blower upon them.
What kind of a boat is that? There's no wind or waves and it is seriously listing to port. And it's barely in the water. Maybe this is all a dream?
Question of the week:
Other than being stubbornly eccentric, in what way is Wilbur like Prince Charles? Oops, King Charles.
@Meg: Well, the coronation did strike me as overblown and tasteless. Does that count? Also, Charles ignored Harry pretty much completely; not too unlike Wilbur ignoring Dawn.
Also, Charles’ coronation garb was pretty disheveled and messy- looked like he had been sleeping in them for about 70 years!
No, the correct answer is that Wilbur is not a bachelor, but a divorced widower. The prize will roll over until the next coronation.
Sunday
Ed and Estelle canoodling while the animals run free? Gag….
If it’s sunset, why is it so much darker in the water than on that hillside?
Dr. Jeff- the special tonight is pufferfish. While it’s not the turf and surf, it is the burp and urp.
@meg, Jeff will skip the pufferfish. He just loves the Bum Boat version of surf and turf: sardines and a hamburger.
Sometimes this strip is so fascinating that it leaves me speechless.
-- Scottie
KitKat- well, whatever Jeff is eating, it’s made ‘the gray go away.’ No, I mean his hair, not Mary. (although eating sardines would mean Jeff would get even less sweet, sweet lovin’ from Mary.)
I think I hear a new story calling. Will it be a troubled waitress in the Bum Boat? Will there be yet another marriage proposal for Mary to swat at? Will the surf and turf finally catch up to Dr. Jeff and we will discover that Mary never bothered to learn CPR or carry her cell phone or memorize 9-1-1? Oh, I can hardly wait.
@Meg...nice..."divorced widower". Although, I must admit, I didn't recall that his ex had passed (Wilbur, of course).
@MissScarlett:
I hereby swear on a stack of gray books (widely available in Charterstone condos and SRJC academic offices) that when Dawn came to live with Wilbur, it was because her mom had died.
However, when I attempted to find a character description of Dawn which mentions it… I fell down the google rabbit hole. Google mary Worth characters, and you will get hundreds of hits!
Lots and lots of serious scholarly articles, plenty of snarky articles, even a full diary on The Daily Kos, where I am a regular…
where, oh where, was I on March 25, 2022?…. So if you must have absolute proof of Wilbur’s divorced widowhood, you may be doomed to disappointment. Sorry not sorry.
Meg
Scarlet with one t. Sorry!
Tuesday
Is that Jerry, formerly of Jerry’s Sandwich Shop? I don’t know if this is the Bum Boat, but the surf and turf turns out to be clam chowder and strip steak. (I bet it’s Manhattan clam chowder - bleah.)
So the old familiars know what they like and get their usuals (yawn). Mary takes some of her dinner home to make salmon squares for the pool parties we never see anymore.
Hey Meg: I have a subscription to a website that has newspaper archives, and I went down a road a while back finding the strips where Dawn first appeared (1993.) Her mother was alive at the time. It's possible she died later on. I posted some of them in a thread in the Readers of the Comics Curmudgeon group on Facebook.
If it makes you happy
It can't be that bad
If it makes you happy
Then why the hell are you so sad?
Wanders must have seen this long dark dinnertime of the soul coming. No wonder he retired.
hmmm- And salmon squares.
I really think Jeff is taking his life in a new direction. First that fancy boat (he keeps mentioning needing an "upgrade", (code for time to get with someone new in his life?) and then at dinner, he goes for clam chowder and strip steak instead of his "go to" surf and turf. What's next? The possibilities are endless, and all because he voyeuristically checked in on the current state of Estelle and Wilbur.
@Tina Wood:
Thank you for checking. I subscribe, but I couldn’t seem to get to 1993.
My recollection is that Wilbur was telling Mary (duh! Who else would he tell?) that his ex had died sometime after Dawn came to live with him. And surely, the Weston clan being so warm and close and normal and all, Dawn would have gone back to visit dear old Connecticut society mom at some point. Or a there would have been a call from the ex complaining about the alimony check being late.
Note to self: Quit discussing comic characters as though they are real, or The Others will think I am nuts. I also think I remember discussion of why he and the ex split up- something to do with tuxedos and bridge and dessert forks… Woops, must go, here comes Big Nurse with my noon meds.
Well, I keep hoping for something exciting...maybe a person of color in an actual story line? I don't recall seeing Jerry before, maybe it is finally his turn for some drama and muffins.
@Meg. Heavens, don't apologize. It way too much fun to speculate.
I would like to count Mr. Allora...but I don't think we know anything about him.
While clam chowder, provided it is the New England variety, is very nice indeed, I don’t consider it a component of surf and turf. We’re talking lobster, or at the very least, jumbo shrimp. And I’ll have the filet. Medium rare, thank you, with a baked potato, butter, not sour cream. (Imagination is a wonderful thing…none of that is going to happen in my real life.)
@MissScarlet:
Strangely enough, Jerry the Waiter closely resembles the most recent iteration of Mr. Allora on 5/2/18, MW 2876. Mr. Allora looked completely different on July 5, 2016, when he was slim, clean-shaven and pale. Incidentally, that is the infamous episode where he callously delivered the hand truck to Tommy-writhing-on-the-floor-Beedie.
Thank goodness I have a hobby like this to keep me from wasting my time.
WEDNESDAY
The eternally frustrated Jeff feels sorry for THEM? Good one!
-- Scottie
That couple has their elbows on the table too, Jeff! Tsk tsk. BTW, spending time with Mary has taken a toll on you.
Jeff is trying to convince himself that he and Mary actually HAVE a relationship, so it's easy to get all judgy on others. Glad to see Mary is setting him straight.
Boy, judgy much Jeff?
Does Mary know this couple, or is she calling on her meddler’s spidey-sense? I know I’m being overly optimistic, but could they be—gasp—Brand New Characters?
Mary: "Jeff, I am the meddler, don't step on my territory. I will find a reason to interfere on my own."
Jeff: "Yes, dear, please forgive me. Date night same time next year?"
Hmm.. it appears the BumBoat has become a submarine, and we are watching Mary and Jeff from several fathoms down. Good thing I'm wearing my SCUBA gear, especially because this dialogue oought to be deep sixed.
Both Jeff and Mary probably wish they could be reading something interesting on their phones instead of talking to each other.
Two things I’d love to see:
That couple hears Jeff’s observations about them and marches over to Jeff and Mary’s table to confront them.
Infuriated by Jeff daring to disagree with her, Mary tosses her wine in his face.
I'm starting to think that Moy doesn't actually know where the strip is going. She's stalling for time while she reads our comments and tries to decide which ideas have merit.
Ha ha....we all know Moy would never care about what we think. At the very least, Wilbur would be dead if she did.
Later tonight, the BumBoat will offer entertainment! Tonight’s show features Wilbur the Karaoke Ventriloquist, with Madame Wendy, the Country Contralto. Give it up for this wacky pair as they harmonize on ‘Smoke, smoke, smoke that cigarette’.
FRIDAY
If Jeff gets any more nosy and judgey, he'll have to ask Mary to teach him how to make muffins.
Sheesh, give it a rest, big guy.
-- Scottie
Subtly, Jeff pushes the check to Mary's side of the table. Since purchasing the yacht, money's a little tight.
I wonder if Mary’s thought about taking her advice-giving gig to TikTok.
Todays strip: Jeff needs to MYOB.
I'm having withdrawals! HELP!!!
PLEASE, throw us a bone once in a while!
I miss you Mr.Wanders and KitKat too!!
Mary worth is not WORTH reading any more without your humorous commentary.
We can still chat here. Our own little Bum Boat.
Saturday
I’m still here! It’s just that this week’s storyline (a way-too-grand description of this dreck) has worn me down. Considering how Mary has slapped Jeff down, maybe she’s getting a wee bit tired of him after all. This would be a great time for the reappearance of;
1. John Dill!
2. Ted Miller! (what a character!)
3. Aldo Kelrast!
@KitKaat
Ooooh! Aldo Kelrast back from the dead! That could be very fun! Or, how about Aldo's identical twin?!
So...never happen.
Aldo’s identical twin uses the name Bob Keeshan.
I wonder why it took Jeff so long to admit that Mary was right. Obviously, Moy is dragging this out for as long as she can. Mary is always right and Jeff has know it for decades.
And so, they enjoy their small portions of gray steak and gray salmon in companionable silence (eating with their small forks.)
@meg. To get the Bob Keeshan reference requires being into trivia and/or old. I, happily, am both!
fauxprof: Back at ‘ya!
Monday
I guess it was only a matter of time: “Dogs are Good!” Chapter 17. Let’s hope we have strong stomachs. (We can hope that volunteer receptionist Estelle makes a life-altering mistake at Animal Hospital, where the other employees are invisible.)
I'm wondering how someone "reciprocates with neutral expressions". Mary sounds like some sort of social science researcher, judging someone's gestures "neutral". Plus, if Jeff is making assumptions, so is she. The other diners could be murderers on the lam, planning their next move instead of a couple on a date night, escaping rowdy kids.. Regardless, Jeff has been properly chastised and figured out a smooth way to get Mary to shut up...
MONDAY
I really hope this doesn't turn out to be a dead Max or Greta story. I don't think I could handle it. I'm still trying to come to grips with losing Wanders.
TUESDAY
@hmmm, what you mentioned yesterday may be on the horizon, what with Saul rhapsodizing about being blessed with his darling Greta. (Does Saul remember the late Bella?) That white shepherd (?) might crash into their path, for instance.
I’m still coming to grips with the absence of Wanders too, not to mention the lack of HelenClark’s bracingly hilarious comments, and so many others [sigh].
The dog park's not crowded today. They all saw Old Man Wynter coming and bolted. That brown sweater he wears in the heat hasn't been cleaned since the Carter administration, and it reeks.
-- Scottie
Since non sequiturs are the order of the day in the Worthiverse, I expect to see Eve walk up to Saul tomorrow with a banana smoothie.
"Oh good, it's not too crowded today" is a sentence never seen in a serial strip before and possibly ever again.
Perhaps Eve and Saul are destined to marry since they enjoy each others company, but don't talk to each other? Well, that's not strictly true: they do affirm that dogs are good.
This summer coming to a comic strip near you:
DOGS ARE GOOD: The Return
Get ready for an elderly love story steeped in canine antics. See Saul walk Greta. See Eva at the vet's office. See them run into each other.
Rated B for boring. Not suitable for any audience with an IQ above three.
WEDNESDAY
Well, Karen phoned another one in.
-- Scottie
Please stop reading here if you feel at all queasy: I predict that the next storyette, since we know that Greta is the daughter Saul never had, that Pierre and Greta will soon present Saul with the granddog he’s also never had, a critter with short forelegs and four short legs.
And Max will go wild with jealousy. Perhaps he’s at the vet for a little procedure…
@meg, I love the way you think. If only. Instead, we’re stuck with “Bring it back to papa” [egad].
The suspense here is so thick, I could cut it with a (butter) knife. Is Saul training Greta for a life of theft? Will Greta choke on that ball she just retrieved and have to be rushed to Dr. Ed's (who we know is expert in the removal of such balls)? Will that fellow who threw a ball for his dog the other day turn out to be of unsavory character and grab Greta? Where is a Disney movie scriptwriter when you need one?
@Louise: On strike?
meg!! How silly of me! Of course. Thanks for the reminder. Let's hope Hollywood doesn't resort to the likes of KM to fill in for the strikers.
If KM wrote for the movies:
GWTW: “As G-d is my witness, I’ll never go dogless again.”
Air Force One: “Get off of my condo deck!”
The Graduate: “Are you trying to seduce me, Mrs. Cameron.?”
A Streetcar Named Desire: “STELLLLLLLLLLLLLL!”
Apollo 13: “Mary Worth, we got a problem.”
Bond films: “Weston, Wilbur Weston.”
The Godfather: “Drop the plunger, take the muffins.”
The Wizard of Oz: “Drunkards, and biddies, and airheads, oh my!”
@Meg. OMG, some of those I actually want to see.
@meg, you just won the internet!
THURSDAY
"How's Max's checkup going?"
"It's not. They've got some new airhead receptionist here and she screwed up my appointment."
-- Scottie
meg, I was chortling!! Especially loved your Apollo 13 version..And in a tribute to MW's soap opera history, I suspect some bad health news for Eve's dog that will necessitate a good deal of melodrama. Since I hear the soaps only have a limited amount of scripts "in the can", perhaps KM IS auditioning for a writer's position on "General Hospital" but with a veterinary twist..
Greta has been LYING TO AND DECEIVING Wynters all this time, about her past life! She should be in politics!
“We take care of each other! Max prepares my breakfast every morning!”
@meg, my personal favorite in your above list is the one from “The Graduate” [chortle].
Uh oh...dogs are good but they don't last.
FRIDAY
Oh no, Greta is missing! It’s your fault for taking your eyes off her while blabbing with Eve, Saul.
Well, it’s quite apparent why Greta has ‘disappeared’. With her super keen hearing, Greta heard Eve tell Saul to give her (Greta) a kiss. Would anyone EVER want to get kissed by Saul? He had herring cream cheese on a garlic bagel for breakfast, and he chews Beechnut gum all day long.
Hide, girl, hide!
Bulletin:
Golem rampages through Santa Royale park!
Women and children flee in panic, dogs and cats scatter, rabbits faint. Men pretend not to notice, while perusing the Daily Racing Form.
Papa, if I were you, I’d check out that tunnel. If she’s in there, you’ll see her, and she can run for help when you get stuck.
Or maybe Greta got tired of the trash can all over the park and went home to play with Libby.
Greta has been dognapped! Will Saul pay the reward? What would Mary say? (besides, "have a muffin").
Oh my! That blue van WWHOOOSSHHing away with a whimpering Greta is even more beat up than Jared’s jalopy. It must be driving to somewhere with cracked plaster on the walls, like we’ve come to expect from Ashlee or Arthur or Tommy’s friend Vin. Surely only a true cracked-plaster lowlife would dognap such a saintly wienerdog.
Or maybe it’s the tombstone salesman, down on his luck and needing another massive order.
AND…we’re off to Goleta!!!
I wonder if Wanders is still reading “Mary Worth.” A dognapped Greta could either pique his interest or reinforce his decision to retire.
Uh oh….does this mean that Moy’s in my head now?
Monday
What an abrupt transition to Mary and Eve! I can hardly wait to see those posters.
Next Sunday: a ransom note with letters cut from magazines and coupon supplements is delivered to Saul.
And so begins the rehabilitation arc for Wilbur Weston…
Using his knowledge of, and contacts deep within the karaoke and ‘journalism’ worlds, Wilbur quickly realizes that a flamboyant karaoke performer is hoping to acquire an elaborate greatcoat made from -(avert your eyes, boys and girls- dachshund FUR!- in order to present the 101 Dachshunds song in a competition at Burning Man. Without revealing too much, I can tell you that Wilbur does catch up with the evildoer and rescues Greta. He then presents an exclusive podcast of “She Shouldn’t be Alive, but She Is!” Let’s listen in:
‘Greta, when did you realize you might be in trouble?’
WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF!
‘And what did you do then?’
whimper, whimper, whimper….
Tune in to Wilbur’s podcast for the rest of the details, including commentary from Saul Wynter. I have too many tears in my eyes to continue…
.
I look forward to finding out that the dognapper is none other than our old friend Arther/Arthur.
And as the karaoke champ takes the stage, everyone gasps! OMD, it’s Mary Worth!
I'm guessing there is a dognapping ring that has been scoping out canines at the park for several weeks. A sure sign of a well-treated dog is the matching outfit worn by said dog and owner (bow ties for Saul and Greta, scarves for Eve and Max). No point taking a dog who is not as well loved and cared for. Cue the friendly police officer, who will provide a lecture on not taking your eyes off your dog at the dog park..
I have a thought. In case there are those of you with less trivia-obsessed brains than mine (likely everyone) haven’t heard, there is a new Oscar Mayer story. The Wienermobile will henceforth be known as the FRANKMOBILE! (because, snicker).
Perhaps there is soon to be a giant event (in Santa Royale) featuring the Frankmobile, and hundreds, nay, thousands of wiener dogs are to appear en masse. ‘Twill go viral, worldwide; the sight of those woofing and yapping four-legged frankfurters will create a sensational demand for hot dogs. Unfortunately the Hollywood agency charged with recruiting and hiring said animals has discovered that it’s much easier to just borrow the dogs from parks. I hope Greta is ready for her closeup.
Haven’t we seen ‘helpful young woman’ before? Wasn’t she harmed by a boyfriend and Jared became her ‘friend’? This could end up being a really complicated plot.
Hey, didn't I see this dog-napping story line in Mark Trail (back when Mark Trail used to be good)?
I notice the Worthiverse doesn't seem to have any cops. Plenty of crime--muggings, stalkers (Aldo Kelrast), theft (Toby's purse, romance scams) but never any police to investigate. And now poor old Saul has to go door to door to inquire about his missing dog. In fact, there doesn't seem to be any government at all in Santa Royale.. Wonder how they get their trash picked up...
@LouiseF, the last police officer (maybe the ONLY one) was Scott Fletcher (I may have the wrong surname - it’s been a looonnnggg time), who married Adrian, Jeff’s daughter). Santa Royale exists in its own peculiar bubble in another dimension. We need Rod Serling to beam himself in to offer commentary.
How could Saul overlook adding “And she was wearing a bow tie exactly like mine!”?
If Mary is also going door to door, does she have a basket of muffins with her?
Not a comment about the comic, but has anyone else had Malwarebytes or another filter block this site? It said it was blocked due to Malicious content.
Or is merely having Mary on the site enough to constitute malice.
Thanks all.
Me no, I am still freely stalking the site. Did you try "restarting your computer"?
Oops, not stalking. The correct term apparently is "lurking".
Eve's dog (I forgot the name) looks incredibly sad. I hope he/she feels better soon. And what magic adhesive makes a poster stick to tree bark? I need some of that at home.
Anonymous at 1:27 a.m., they spread Mary’s muffin batter on the backs of the posters. Presto sticko!
Tsk tsk, Saul left off the most important word for the posters: REWARD!!
@KitKat. Good catch! If Saul is going to be scammed someone will have to try to claim the reward
So KitKat, I fear the muffin-batter-as-adhesive plan won't work since the presence of anything muffin will surely drive potential poster watchers away, even with a reward.
Someone needs to point this out to him.
Better call Saul!
@KitKat, I was just thinking the same thing! How much fun Wanders would have had with Noodle Man!
Mary looks embarrassed as she drives the human bullhorn around town (it’s about dern time something embarrassed her).
I’ve been wondering about “Papa.” Does Saul pronounce it like Madonna (Papa, don’t preach), or like some snooty English aristocrat ( pa-PA, where are you and ma-Ma going this evening?) ? My husband just asked why I’m saying Papa and pa-Pa over and over as I curate my Cheech & Chong LPs.
@meg, if Greta could sing (and let’s hope she can’t), she would warble that Eddie Fisher classic “Oh My Papa.” Eddie accented the second syllable. If Greta was an English bulldog, Saul would refer to himself as “pater.”
@KitKat, I figured no one but me remembered Eddie Fisher and that song! The line wouldn’t have scanned properly if he had said papa!
My sad prediction for the endgame of VanMan and Greta. A very large python in an adjacent cage will have a snack-shaped bulge, and he’ll be wearing a satisfied smile… and a polka dot bowtie. Let’s see Mary spin that one!
Folks, I don't think this guy has actually seen a noodle.
Story from the Santa Royale Whig Gazette:
A disturbing and as yet unexplained occurrence was reported to SRPD last evening. A carful of elderly people and a dog were driving slowly on downtown streets, shouting odd comments at passersby. The meaning of “Greta, where are you? and Papa loves you” could not be determined, but police are dismissing it as a senior prank.
SUNDAY
And isn't that just like our darling, thoughtful, Karen Moy? We can always count on her to provide us with a brief respite from the cares of this world. Thank you, dear.
Interesting choice, Ms Moy.
I for one am not worried. Like any good James Bond villain, our curly-haired mastermind is indulging in entirely too much gloating and chortling than is wise in the notoriously cutthroat Santa Royale underground dogfight circuit. Another few weeks of this hemming and HAWing will give time for the combined powers of St Thomas Aquinas quotes and Lost Dog posters to do their work.
"I think I'll call you Noodle cause you look like one! HAW HAW HAW!"
"Or maybe I should call you Snack! HAW HAW HAW"
"Or maybe I should call you Maruchan, after the popular instant ramen that's a noodle and snack at the same time! HAW HAW HAW"
I was going to refer to KM’s newest villain as Lord Haw-haw, but I doubt her knowledge of history is that comprehensive.
Sympathizing with bereft pet owners is usually an easy thing, but Saul annoys the heck out of me. Let’s hope laryngitis sets in soon.
I HATE THIS!!! Sorry, But I can’t bear anything about cruelty to animals. I ma check out for a while. Even a Wilbur storyline would have been preferable.
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