Only Mary would say, "I'm too TIRED to even make homemade chicken soup for myself!" I presume she'd die before opening a can of chicken soup.
So Mary called Toby before Jeff? That's telling. You're right as usual, meg. Toby is giddy with relief at this news: "Get well soon, my friend! Maybe you could defrost a muffin from that storehouse in your freezer. Bye-bye, gotta go!"
I'm looking forward to seeing Mary's face when after finishing her phone calls, she realizes that neither her dear soul mate Jeff, nor any of her cherished, loving friends even offered to stop by with a lousy can of soup.
Toby doesn’t even think about bringing Mary some chicken soup. I know she can’t manage opening a can and turning on the stove, but she could call Door Dash and have it delivered. But she’s concentrating so hard at trying to draw a cat—or something like that.
The annoyed-looking cat staring out of Toby's easel reminds me of those "Can you draw this cat?" come ons pushing drawing lessons that I used to see as a child on the back of Highlights magazines. Apparently Toby will be too busy rendering her version of the cat to bother seeing to Mary's needs. Worse, I imagine the rest of the week a grapevine of Charterstoneites talking to one another by phone as they arrange a surprise dinner at Mary's, brought together with a bout of Covid for all.... Oh, yeah, there is no Covid in the Worthiverse...
The annoyed-looking cat glaring from the easel in front of Toby reminds me of those "Can You Draw this Cat?" ads I used to see as a child on the back cover of Highlights magazines. And why is Toby wearing an apron? Is she contemplating (Yikes!) rendering the puss in watercolor?! And will we be treated to several days of Charterstoneites talking to one another on the phone about what to d about Thanksgiving now that Mary has canceled? My world has definitely been rocked now that I know that comic strip characters can come down with illnesses that affect humans...
It’s hard to see Dawn so brokenhearted over the cancelled Thanksgiving dinner, isn’t it? Now she’ll have to go with someone her own age to see a movie they’ve been looking forward to for years.
Dawn's friend looks likes she stepped out of "Archie."
Mary's 0 for 2 in her search for friends who are (1) despondent over missing her Thanksgiving dinner and (2) concerned enough to order a Happy Meal to be delivered to Mary.
I wonder if Dr. Jeff will blow off Mary? Wouldn't it make sense to call him first? Oh, never mind, it's the worthyverse. I foresee a surprise dinner in Mary's honor.
If that’s supposed to be a poster for “Wicked”, congrats to June for being right on top of the popular culture. Oh, and Cynthia Ervio’s lawyer would like a word…
Undoubtedly, Mary's dear friends will show up with a rotisserie chicken, a bag of frozen Tater tots and a can of green beans. Mary will be thrilled despite the fact that they've caught her wearing the same nightgown she's had on for a week and hasn't yet had the strength to hose down the bathroom. Will she remember to ask them where the heck they were when she needed a can of chicken soup?
Ummm, Jeff…aren’t you a doctor, or something like that? So get your stethoscope and a mask, and maybe a covid test swab, and get over to Mary’s, Let’s make sure it’s not something serious, like RSV.
meg, I had to climb into the Wayback Machine to reacquaint myself with the Jackson Twins, but their faces and hair styles rang a loud bell. Maybe KM or June remembers them too. BTW, my sister, who was 9 1/2 years older than me, had identical twin friends named Joyce and Joan. They were brunettes like the Jacksons, but wore short, pixie-type do's.
Jeff (wearing his orange plaid lumberjack jacket, so manly) was going to visit Mary on Thanksgiving Eve? Was he going to chop celery for the stuffing? Design the nut cups? Color the place mats? He's giving Mary the bum's rush just like Toby and Dawn did. I bet Dawn forgot to relay the news to Wilbur, and he'll be pounding on her door tomorrow expecting dinner.
Oh, just look at old Dr. Hale N. Hearty, speed walking... somewhere? Please tell me that his location isn't the forest behind Charterstone and that it's not Wilbur's bathrobe he's wearing.
As @fauxprof said; isn't Jeff a doctor or something? Is this payback for all of Mary's withholding of (ahem) favors? Looks like he is as genetically unable to hold a phone properly, just as everyone else in this strip. Hmm...maybe Mary doesn't want him 'practicing' medicine on her. After all, he might put that stethoscope near an area completely off limits.
Miss Scarlett and KitKat: O, ye of little faith in the witty mindset of June Brigham! It’s a Thanksgiving Miracle, but I was just browsing some rare books, and one of them was a first edition of The Joy of Cooking, and it was not blue and white, but more of a peachy yellow. Mary is cooking from a rare old book, could be very valuable if signed by Irma S. Rombauer. “To my friend Mary Worth, who can’t cook for nothin’. Maybe this book will help.” On the other hand, my several blue and white volumes are tattered, food-stained, and pretty much worthless. Now I’m off to make Fruit Punch for 50 People, and Simmered Porcupine with Turnip Greens. No boring old turkey for MY guests… (And I hope Dr. Jeff is manning the ER after he finishes marching in the annual Plaid-wearing Parents without Partners Parade.)
Ah, just as we expected, Mary's friends remembered her. The only itty bitty issue is those containers have been sitting in the 80-degree hallway for a couple of hours, and improper food handling may compromise the meal. Oh well, it's the thought that counts!
Happy Thanksgiving to my Worthiverse friends, and to Wanders, who started things and continues to provide us with this Mary Worth Snark Forum! I'm grateful for your support as I navigated troubled waters earlier this year. You people are not only witty writers, you are the souls of kindness! Now, on to Dr. Corey's pumpkin soup - just watch out for those slippery seeds and stringy membranes.
I’m thankful for so many things, certainly including you friends. I look forward to checking in every day and to the smiles that I know your comments will bring. I wish all of you well as we continue forward.
I am so very grateful for all of you MW translators. I've had a terrible year, but your comments and interpretations have lifted me up every day. Happy Thanksgiving to all.
Hope everyone had an enjoyable Thanksgiving Day. As an older person with no close relatives, you folks have started to feel like family to me. I am very grateful to Wanders for having started this blog and maintaining it for so many years, and for all of you who never fail to put a smile on my face every day.
Reading yesterday's comments was a wonderful way to start my day! You Worthiverse Worthies are the best! BTW meg, how was the simmered porcupine with turnip greens? Mary may want your recipe for Christmas dinner.
AND, here's recovering Mary in her purple jammies, sitting on a purple afghan and leaning against purple pillows. Let's have a show of hands: who else detests that hackneyed phrase "with all the fixings/fixins'"? Boo hiss.
Mary looks more satisfied with that sandwich than she ever does with Jeff, to put it mildly. Now we know what really floats her boat. Hey Mary, you might choke by chomping on that sandwich in a semi-reclining position. Does Mr. Alora know the Heimlich Maneuver?
Why, KitKat, thank you for asking! The simmered porcupine was deliciously tender, the meat just fell off the quills. And my husband and I are still trying to finish the fruit punch for 50- our 48 guests failed to show, so we drink a few cups, pass out, sober up, drink a few more cups…you know how it is when your guests disappoint you. And we put the remaining pounds of porcupine in the meat locker at the Piggly Wiggly so they could distribute it to the needy… charity is my middle name! BTW, if anyone wants to know what Wanders is doing since he (sob) abandoned us, you might want to check out the Santa Royale Library.
@meg, you are firing on all cylinders today! I had to pick myself up off the floor to get to my keyboard. You and your husband could have used Toby's assistance with that punch.
Correction to my earlier post: Upon further examination, I should have said "pillow," not "pillows." There's one purple pillow and one purple lamp base, with a shade that looks like a UFO from a 1950s sci-fi movie.
So yesterday, Mary was enthusiastically eating a pilgrim sandwich, and today she’s going to call to thank people, but…ominously…not until after she’s eaten. Oh, how I fear we’re about to have a story in which Mary becomes an obsessive Eater, and PUTS ON WEIGHT, and then we’ll have to endure her struggles as she attends Waist Watchers with Wilbur, and Ian, and Saul…OMG, could that be any more boring? OK, Mary, drop the sandwich and take the carving knife. You look fine, don’t worry about your weight….
A drumstick (that can't be from a turkey!), slices of Spam, and a loaf of bread? Perhaps Mary isn't planning on eating this herself but will instead visit all her dear friends who pitched in for the Dahlia's takeout. "Here Toby, make a sandwich, and give the leg to Ian!"
Dahlia’s specializes in leftovers. No one has ever had an original meal there, or for takeout. Just leftovers. Everyone loves the cold leftover pizza breakfast, fresh from the fridge.
Worthiverse friends, you are all in top form! Hahahahaha etc.!
It's an historic day: the first Zoom Victory Lap and Mary Praise Palooza. I was wrong -- Mary apparently did eat all that food yesterday, and now she's working her way through an entire pie. Those two bags from Dahlia's sure held a lot.
Doesn't Mary know it's impolite to eat while speaking, and in front of other people? Tsk tsk.
Time for a Godfather moment wherein Mary gives her gang the what for, for having never returned her hospitality.
“ Wilbur, I went to listen to your karaoke, and I sat you at my table and fed you mayonnaise many times. And yet you never even offered me a bite of your Woody’s. barbecue.
“Jeff, Jeff…You ferried me on your rusting old USS Caine of a cabin cruiser…and you always took me to the same place for the Bum Boat’s dry, none-too-fresh salmon…would it have killed you to take me to Le Chien D’Amour and dine by candlelight, (which is very flattering to a woman of a certain [i.e. my] age.)? You can afford it- you make a nice living.
“And, Toby, why did you bring the store-brand orange juice and expect me to provide top shelf vodka for our day drinking fun? Ian, you never once invited me to your house for a cup of Auld Adjunct Academic, even though your wife is the only friend of your only neighbor.
“But let’s be frank here…you never wanted my muffins, and you feared sitting on my couch.”
Well meg, you continue to be on fire! I'm picturing KM as the dull, platitude-spouting muse to Mary and you as the impish pixie commenting satirically on the boring proceedings. And, inquiring minds just have to know: please expand on your remark about Wanders and the Santa Royale Library. I even Googled (ahem, researched) that. I did find the Wanderer's Library, which looks cool, but it doesn't seem connected to our Wanders or Santa Royale. Does Santa Royale even have a library?
On to the new plot: Mary has dodged another medical bullet, and Wilbur is still annoying survivors of disasters. Who knew? He hasn't mentioned "I'm Alive!" nor visited any site despite numerous possibilities over the past several years. He's still Wendy, too -- humpf!
Mary taking over Wilbur’s advice column should be fun. Except it won’t be.
It make senses asking a person to give advice whose whole life seems focused on giving people advice. However, without a muffin and the couch to eat it upon, will the advice given in the column ever be taken? Or will Mary’s advice be mocked on social media and go viral leading to a crisis of confidence in Mary. A blog could even start: AskWendyAndMe,com.
And the solution to the missing Wanders and the Santa Royale Library is…. on my Maryworthandme.blogspot.com page. I use an iPad, with the Safari browser, and when I go to that page, the comments are on the left side. On the right side is, among other things, the Jukebox, the How to become a citizen or rather, denizen of Santa Royale. Then there is The Santa Royale Public Library / What Wanders has been Reading part. It caught my eye the other day when the cover of a book (Ghost Army) I had been reading appeared there. When I looked more closely, I realized that it was actually a neatly detailed list of Wanders’ reading interests. And he has very good, wholesome taste. The End
Leave it to meg to point out something unobservant me never noticed, the Santa Royale Library/Wanders's reading list. Thanks so much, meg! It's a wonderful thing to still be connected to Wanders! (I noted "The Things They Carried' by Tim O'Brien on the list. I can vouch for the excellence of that book.)
I can't believe that Wilbur needs R & R. What he really needs is less time with Mary and her muffins and more constructive things to do
@KitKat -- Exactly! What in the world does Wilbur need R&R for? Does he ever do anything but sit around?
Actually, I think I just answered my own question. If he gets off the couch, travels to Florida, and has to go out and visit people, he'll be exhausted after two days, let alone two weeks. -- Scottie
Yes, Wilbur, enjoy Mexico. We will enjoy you being gone. Don’t bother to send pictures, especially if you pack the Speedo. And don’t worry. Mary will take care of your advice column, while Dawn will take care of your surviving fish. I’m sure the fish funeral will be quiet and dignified.
MissScarlet, I treasured the Worthy Awards too. Your comment prompted me to go the MW & Me archives (huzzah to Wanders for their accessibility!) and revisit past WA, which are still a scream. I was trying to find the year that Mr. [somebody], a sort of Russian easy-listening lounge-type singer, had the opening number. Some of you veterans out there must remember -- meg, fauxprof, Louise F.? I His surname may have started with a B. That was hilarious.
Today: For some reason, the Plain Dealer's Comics section has Mary Worth in black and white, while everything else is in color as usual. ??? Perhaps this is a commentary on the feet of snow some regions of Northeast Ohio are coping with (not my area, thank goodness). Mary and Wilbur look like they time-traveled to 1952. A month or two (or seven or eight) in Cancun? Will this be a sequel to Wilbur's escapade with Fabiana in Colombia, or will he disappear and leave Mary with Ask Wendy indefinitely?
Mary, when you end every sentence with an exclamation point, it loses the impact. To be fair, if you removed all the exclamation points from your dialogue today, you would sound like some badly-crafted surveillance bot. And you wouldn’t want anyone to think that.
Dawn is mature for her age? I can remember when Dawn made her debut as a pudgy, bespectacled teenager, dumped on Wilbur by his estranged wife. I can’t pinpoint a year, but I know it was before I got married. So let’s estimate she’s 16 in, say, 1989. So that makes her, what? Early fifties? But, then, the Worthiverse exists in its own timeline, inaccessible even with Doctor Who’s Tardis.
Oh, I get it now. Wilbur doesn't really want to eat that muffin. He's just going to toss it and handle it for a while so it looks like he's gonna eat it.
Thanks, everyone for keeping this up while my family was trapped in Niagara Falls on the east side of the Big Lake Effect Snow Dump over Lake Erie last week. I do have to hand it to KM for at least creating an unexpected holiday strip for Contagious Mary and her friends. I DO notice that none of them cooked for her, instead opting for the truly personal option of ordering out. And, Tiny Fork, I thought of you with the Sunday strip that showed Mary eating a Tiny Bit of Pie from a Tiny Fork. Well rendered! As for Wilbur, I predict he will travel to Mexico, be kidnapped by a cartel that then realizes he is more trouble than he's worth so they dump him at the US border, sans passport. He then spends several months in a refugee camp trying to convince ICE that he is a US citizen. Good times! Finally, I notice people referring to KitKat's comments, but none show up for me on this blog. Do you all have a different log in? I would love to see KitKat's take on these endlessly entertaining stories. Keep warm, everyone, even if you aren't being plagued today with 50mph wind gusts off Lake Erie. Brrrr.....
LouisF, Welcome back. Glad you survived the snow. Regarding Wilbur saying Dawn is mature for her age, I have a hypothesis. Wilbur is comparing Dawn's level of maturity to his, and due to his lack of maturity as evidenced by his disregard for others, his lack of understanding when he is being a jerk, and overall personality, he sees Dawn as a much more mature person. He must think Mary is God-like.
Eating Mary's leaden muffins is the bulk of Wilbur's "heavy research."
Gee willikers, I'm mystified about LouiseF. not seeing my comments. Do the Worthiverse tech wizards have an idea of a possible cause? I'd like to tell Louise that her scenario for Wilbur's escapade in Mexico brought to mind O. Henry's short story "The Ransom of Red Chief," in which two lowlifes kidnap the son of a wealthy man and demand a ransom. The boy turns out to be a rapscallion who terrorizes the kidnappers, and they are more than happy to abandon their scheme.
The saga of the uneaten muffin continues. I wonder if Mary will deign to comment (e.g.: Are you gonna eat that or what?).
Does anyone know of any advice columns that run only 1 day a week? Carolyn Hax, Dear Abby, Ask Eric, Miss Manners - they are all every day, or 6 days a week. How on earth does Wilbur support himself and Dawn?
Ah, MissScarlet, no one in the Worthiverse has any financial concerns! Most noteworthy is Mary herself, who apparently is still living off the resources the late Dear Jack left to her almost one hundred years ago, despite losing everything in the Great Crash of 1929. Jeff must've made a bundle in his medical practice (he has that ridiculous yacht, for one thing, and is "semi-retired"). Toby dabbles in her artwork and taught one class at the University of Santa Royale Community College; Ian must be very well paid as a tenured professor at the USRCC. Wilbur's "Survivor Stories" and "Ask Wendy" take little time but apparently pay very well. Which reminds me, he hasn't offered to pay Mary for filling in as Wendy while he gallivants in Mexico.
Well put, Miss Scarlet. Mary is never convincing when she's trying to be cool and amusing. She's going to have to do a lot of holiday baking to make up for the muffin deficit that occurred in her Thanksgiving absence...
@LouiseF "And, Tiny Fork, I thought of you with the Sunday strip that showed Mary eating a Tiny Bit of Pie from a Tiny Fork."
Yes, it's nice to make an appearance, although Tiny Stemware seems more favored. But I'm over it, so no worries.
@meg I had an actual low-blood sugar attack today, and it reminded me of your passing on Mary's (hilarious!) comments about my punctuation intolerance. In my answer, because I didn't make it clear as could be, I hope you did not think I was replying to you: I was replying to Mary, and the "low blood sugar" was referring to my own, not Mary's (or yours.) In Mary's case, of course, what flows through her arteries is nothing _but_ sugar.
Wilbur returns home unexpectedly and finds Dawn eating steamed seaweed. He loses it. "A VEGAN???!!! NOT UNDER MY ROOF, YOUNG LADY!!! YOU CAN TAKE YOUR SMELLY GREEN GUNK AND GET OUT!!!" -- Scottie
I call foul! Being vegan requires initiative, dedication, adherence to restrictions, self awareness and the ability to successfully balance nutritional needs. Dawn? 'Nuff said.
Plus, Dawn just started her vegan diet today? Who does that and then goes to eat at someone's house who is likely using the 1933 version of the Betty Crocker cookbook?! I anticipate days of truly tedious monologues by Dawn trumpeting the virtues of the vegan diet...
Displaying her maturity, Dawn's first question is "What are we having tonight, Mary?"
Mary will smile while not revealing that the mushroom stroganoff contains regular sour cream and the orange tofu stir fry was made with butter. Take that, you spoiled brat.
Stroganoff usually requires sour cream, but there’s probably a vegan substitute. I get the feeling that KM googled “vegan recipes” and picked a couple at random.
With any luck, Dawn's new boyfriend will turn out to be the lying, burger eating, ski cap wearing former boyfriend of Sonja from the Keith Hilland story. Unlikely, as that would be sort of amusing. In any case, as a vegetarian, I am mildly interested in how badly KM will "butcher" this vegan scenario.
Oh good.. Dawn is so accustomed to Mary advising her, I'm guessing we will have Mary providing the virtues of the vegan diet, chief among them get yourself a vegan adviser...
When I read this morning's strip, I thought Mary said "open bar," not "open ear." I bet Toby could oblige Dawn with an open bar anytime, especially since Dawn maintains she's "an independent kind of girl." That's a laugh and a half!
meg, because of the appearance of Mary's muffins, I've assumed the secret ingredient is asphalt. Maybe asphalt is vegan.
Some kind of problem with Mary's continuity here. Yesterday ended with her saying "Speaking of which" regarding her cooking followed today by a comment about Wilbur traveling. Judging by the amount of "brown rice" in that big bowl, maybe Mary is figuring on having Dawn over for leftovers until Wilbur gets back.
Billy? Who is Billy? It doesn’t matter, just another one of Dawn’s never seen boyfriends. Actually, the most memorable of Dawn’s exes, although never seen, was Dave. Anyone here who remembers the greatest panel ever, “Reminds me of Dave” will probably recall laughing yourself into hysteria.
As usual Mary doesn't ask any questions like "Why did you think it would lead to something more?" Instead she offers "Don't rush love", advice that nobody asked for and that may not even apply. I, too, long for the days of "Reminds me of Dave..."
You nailed it, LouiseF. Mary seldom (never?) listens to other people. Today, Dawn's remark about Wilbur, which is fairly insightful, especially for Dawn, is batted away by Mary. Stand by for a torrent of platitudes and squishy blah-blah from Mary/Wendy. She'll be sitting by her weird computer tomorrow.
Hanging out with Jared and his girlfriend, hmm? Gee, that sounds...so...terribly awkward in so many ways. KM must be in the throes of crippling writer's block to dredge up Jared and What's Her Name, who should be seeing a ton of red flags waving in front of her.
Dawn's still trimmimg her hair with nail scissors.
Dawn: What are your plans, Cathy? Cathy: We're going skiing in the mountains. Last year, we tried skiing in the Mojave Desert, but it really wasn't all that much fun.
Good heavens! Someone unlocked the safe that has the brightly colored ink. How festive! And on that note, I will now ruin things with my annual carol:
Dr. Jeff sings, to the tune of Sleigh Ride
Just hear those foghorns sounding And waves are pounding here, too Come on, it’s lovely weather For a boat ride together with you Outside the wind is rising It’s not surprising to view But still, it’s lovely weather For a boat ride together with you
There’s a happy feeling Nothing in the world can buy When at last we reach the Bum Boat And we didn’t die The salmon and the surf and turf And maybe they’ll have pie Keep doing the same old thing And never wonder why
Just hear those small craft warnings And winter stormings come through Time for a lame proposal And curt disposal by you The same old course before us, A boozy chorus or two But still, it’s lovely weather For a boat ride together with you
Thanks, KitKat, but credit for "Moyzone" goes to the inimitable Miss Scarlett, who took my idea and made it better. If only Moy herself could make this dreck better. -- Scottie
fauxprof, you have outdone yourself with this year's Christmas carol! I was singing along with Jeff and picturing his over-the-top yacht, with Mary arm-wrestling him for control of the wheel. Brava, brava!
What's the deal with the shoes? I have never bought shoes for someone for Christmas. Slipper? Yes. Socks? Yes. Perhaps it is inviting people to dress up for the holidays. I'm sure things are hoppin' in good ol' Santa Royale.
Hooray, fauxprof!! I'm feeling more festive just humming along to your version of "Sleigh Ride". And those shoes?! Darn ugly.... No wonder they're on sale. The fact that Dawn and her friend are even looking at them says plenty about their taste, almost as much as Dawn's talking about "hanging out" with her ex as if that isn't going to lead to some (not that intriguing) drama...
fauxprof, if KM introduces a character named Curt Disposal, we'll know she reads this blog. He could be Dawn's new romantic interest. She needs a lot of help, and less cliches, in getting back on the horse, keeping her options open, and peeling her eyes (ouch). How hanging around with her ex and his current girlfriend fits into that plan is a mystery to me.
Is the pink couple in p. 1 two bumbling extraterrestrials? The one on the left calls to mind Wilbur, except he/it has too much hair.
Who is Cathy telling to get back on the horse? She doesn't seem to be looking at Dawn. Is it a coincidence that 'Dawn' rhymes with 'yawn'? I'll leave it to our lyricist, faux prof, to decide.
Meg, you are posting, but apparently you aren't able to see your posts. Is that right? Blink once for yes and twice for no. We need you back. -- Scottie
Agh, meg is stuck in the Moyzone! A couple of weeks ago, LouiseF. wrote that she was unable to see my posts; LouiseF., please comment if you can see this. (Maybe the weight of all the comments is affecting the blog.)
A "friendship break"? Is this a Dawn Yawn original? It's dopey enough to be one.
A prediction: Dawn will initially find this big lunkhead attractive; then she’ll see Jared again and realize that his witty and earnest personality is really the type she’s attracted to. Then we’ll get the catfight we’re all craving.
Dawn thinks she picked Dirk up? (OMG—Dirk? She was better off with Dork—er, Jared.). Anyway, it looks like the beginning of love-bombing to me, but Dawn wouldn’t recognize a red flag if someone dropped it on her head.
Would someone please send KM an Urban Dictionary? No person of Dawn's (presumed) age (or anyone else under the age of 92) would think "amazing physique." Possibly: peng, fleek, rlgm, hot, smokin', jack, dime piece; there are dozens of other ways to describe Eye Candy. But "amazing physique"? No. Comprehend, KM, comprehend.
Dawn thinks she got lucky. What she got by handing her phone over to a complete stranger was scammed. It took Handy Tandy less than 30 seconds to get access to not only every piece of her personal information that she ever emailed, texted, or messaged, but also that of everyone on her contact list.
Wonder what sort of vegan delight Daw's new love interest has in store for her. And dinner on Christmas? No matter what monochromatic outfit she pulls out of that closet, she is headed for a reckoning with Robo Bowler...
Taking her out on Christmas Day? Where? Church? His grandmother’s house? A Chinese restaurant? She just met this guy, and Dirk Tandy is a phony name if ever I heard one.
Is he a serial killer? A recruiter for a dangerous cult? An insurance salesman? When you consider your answer, please remember that this is the place that interesting plot possibilities come to die. Or is he just an off duty Hot Santa? Enjoy your holidays!
Finally, something somewhat interesting to ponder. On every Mary Worth Christmas day panel that I can remember, I've seen Mary about to place a 56-lb. turkey on her dining room table surrounded by Dr Jeff, Toby and Ian, Wilbur and Dawn. With Wilbur away and Dawn, now seen seated on the greasy, red pleather seats of the bowling alley (btw, owned by Dirk) slurping Chinese take-out, whose heads will June photoshop onto Dawn's and Wilbur's bodies? My guess is Saul and Eve. Both have a shape similar to Wilbur's but neither has the perkiness of Dawn's... um... nose.
Merry Christmas everyone. Looks like Mary cut back to a forty-five pound turkey. You have to wonder how pitiful Dirk and Dawn are that they have no friends or family to see.
Thunderheels - My thoughts exactly. Who goes on a first date on Christmas Day?! But apparently, family and friend relationships make as much sense as anything else in the Worthiverse. Why doesn't Mary invite Dr Drew, Dr Jeff's bachelor son to dinner? Or better yet, why doesn't Dr Jeff go to his daughter Adrian's home to have dinner with his grandchildren? BTW - I'm still annoyed that KM used the male spelling of Adrian instead of the female; Adrienne. Hope she never introduces a character named Francis / Frances. Anyway, hope everyone had a lovely Holiday!
Before we forget about yesterday's "Mary Christmas!" (haha, KM made a third-rate play on words), did we all notice something momentous? Eve was pictured NOT WEARING A NECKERCHIEF. What a stunning development!
Today: Dirk reveals himself to be a Jerk and Dawn abandons her veganism in record time, and on Christmas Day. Who could've seen that happening, other than everyone in the world? Perhaps June positioning the server's posterior so prominently in panel 1 is her commentary.
KitKat - YES! The absence of Eve's ever-present neckerchief was the second thing I noticed. Max must be dead. But the first thing I noticed was that apparently the colorist was shocked at Toby's plunging decolletage and decided to color purple, the area of her chest beneath her pendant.
Getting back to Wednesday and Mary's annual Grand Presentation of the Overstuffed Christmas Turkey: Jeez, just look at her face! It appears that she has inhaled way too much of the gaseous leakage from this bloated PriceCo double-discount Thanksgiving bird, and she's higher than the moon. -- Scottie
Scottie, I am glad to see you are keeping up with the latest Martha Stewart Holiday Recommendations, the better to judge Mary's dinner presentation. I also love the dangers you point out regarding her double-discount turkey, the possibilities of which augur a more interesting plot than the one transpiring between Dawn and RoboBowler. Guessing Dawn skipped the Christmas turkey at Mary's for vegan reasons but now is cast into a roast beef hell... Serves her right.
Scottie, you are at the top of your game! Another head-scratcher: Were those whole pears encircling that turkey? The platter was full, so how was the turkey carved without overflowing the platter.
On to Dirk n' Dawn: A part-time used-car salesman? (Bellride Automall doesn't sound like an Audi dealership.) Only in the Moyzone would a 22-year-old man in the 21st century say, "I'll use my public relations skills in the corporate arena...." And, Dawn is a major-less junior! Only nine more years until she becomes a senior.
Good call on that lethal turkey, Scottie. It's probably been sitting out on her kitchen counter since she got home from PriceCo, three days before Thanksgiving.
I was surprised to see that UCSB does offer a major in automotive engineering (aka UCSR), although not "automotive business". I don't think you can get into any kinds of business "arena" these days without a graduate degree. Dirk may be stuck in the auto parts store for quite a while. Perhaps he'll be able to use his 'corporate skills' on the auto store customers. I'm sure they will be thrilled.
Dirk stares meaningfully into Dawn’s eyes, holding her hand tightly. Dawn blushes and thinks, he’s going to propose. “Dawn, I’d like to….put you in a brand new Oldsmobuick tomorrow! Whattaya say?”
"One day I'll use my public relations skills in the corporate arena, just as soon as I learn to talk like a normal person. Until then, I'm pushing beaters at Shifty's Used Car Emporium."
"Dirk, did you just hear what you said?"
"Of course not. I'm a himbo."
" 'Pushing beaters.' You just spoke like a real human!"
"I did? Do you really mean that?"
"Yes, YES! You are a real boy!"
And then Dirkbod grabbed his phone and gave the news to Gepetto.
"Aw, don't feel guilty! I had the same thing, and I feel great! Now, baby, how's about you doing something to thank me?" [Dirk winks and leers at Dawnie].
Scottie, the Dirk n' Dawn plot has gotten your creative juices flowing!
Mary did not tell dawn to take her time. She told her that she hopes the relationship will turn out the way Dawn wants. Looks to me like it is heading straight for what Dawn wants.
I guess if there was ever any question about to what demographic KM targets her stories, this ancient thinking about men not making passes at girls who wear glasses should eliminate any doubts.
@hmmm; indeed, straight out of the Moyzone. I wonder if Dirk will prove to be the big jerk we all think he is so quickly. After making out in the car yesterday, he can tell Dawn today that he can't be seen with anyone who wears glasses, since they look smarter than he is.
Seriously, Dawn, if this "coming of age" (FINALLY) story ends up with Mary having to explain to you why this guy is bad news, then I think you were actually pretty lucky that the only thing your school friends made fun of was your looks.
And the red flags keep flying. First he moves too fast, then he’s controlling, now he’s belittling her. Dawn, there is a good podcast called “Something Was Wrong”. I suggest you binge all the seasons.
March 10, 2025: Wilbur returns from Mexico and is greeted at his apartment door by Dawn and a man he's never seen before. An excited Dawn hugs Wilbur and exclaims, "Welcome home, Dad! This is Dirk - he moved in with me in January. And guess what? You're going to be a grandfather!"
It is a little-known fact that Dawn is quite close to the Cameron family, particularly Ian, who is quite protective of his ‘honorary’ daughter. When Mary Worth informed Ian of how Dirk was mistreating Dawn, Ian snarled, “I’ll run my dirk through yon young Dirk!”
Some people call themselves 'nerds' and mean it in a positive, brainy way. Dirt may think he is actually complementing Dawn...of course he doesn't know her very well. Wait till he finds out she's been working on her college degree for 15 years and she still doesn't have a major.
Excellent observation, Scottie. Dirk reminded me of someone, but I couldn't put my finger on who. Thank you!
I was startled by that blue keyhole on Dawn's neck until I realized it's her earring.
Mary-As-Wendy has unleashed the platitude machine - coveryour eyes! We need to see some of Wilbur's answers to compare them with her meaningless drivel. Also, does she have her laptop Velcroed to her blankie?
@MissScarlett -- Ha haaaa, "puckerless lip press"! That is wonderful! I knew there was something weirdly unnatural about June's depiction, but I couldn't find the right words. You nailed it! Well done! -- Scottie
I can't help noticing that Dawn's "date" is entering its third day...Guessing Mary's contribution to Ask Wendy is a made up answer to a question Mary imagines Dawn asking. I doubt Mary has any real mail to answer, just keeping in meddle practice.
It must still be New Year's Day in the Worthiverse since these two are wearing the same clothes, and Dirk Head is still trying with the "Nerdgirl" comment....Trying indeed.
As to Dawn looking like Wilbur, when she was first introduced—I’m guessing mid-1980s—she looked a lot like Wilbur. Full head of hair, but pudgy, with those same glasses. She was supposed to be about 16 and quite obnoxious, as I remember.
Dawn demonstrates a great capacity to ignore alarm bells, red flags, and flashing red lights. Meanwhile, Mary uses the line she gave Jeff when she nixed his New Year's Eve invitation in "Ask Wendy." That's life in the Moyzone.
I don't know guys, about Dirk's resemblance to Zak. Since Zak always sported a chin stubble, I'm not sure if he had a cleft chin. I'm getting more of a Tom Brady vibe. Anyway, don't worry about the Nerdgirl name, Dawn. If it turns out that Dirk sticks around for a while, it won't be long before he's calling you "Dear". Personally, I'd prefer Nerdgirl.
Of course Mary can stay home on NYE all snug in her bed. She's complete and perfect all by herself. She is called, however, to help the less fortunate 'Ask Wendy' writers. So selfless. So admirable. So Moyzone.
"A great time tonight"? Is it still New Year's Eve in the Moyzone? Note that Dawn and Mary have the same bedside lamp. Maybe that's a Charterstone requirement.
Hmm, does Dawn's frown indicate that she's a mite perturbed with Mr. Gorgeous and his disregard for her wishes? (BTW, why is she wearing her glasses in bed?)
3,350 comments:
«Oldest ‹Older 2601 – 2800 of 3350 Newer› Newest»Only Mary would say, "I'm too TIRED to even make homemade chicken soup for myself!" I presume she'd die before opening a can of chicken soup.
So Mary called Toby before Jeff? That's telling. You're right as usual, meg. Toby is giddy with relief at this news: "Get well soon, my friend! Maybe you could defrost a muffin from that storehouse in your freezer. Bye-bye, gotta go!"
That's the most threatening cat I've ever seen.
I'm looking forward to seeing Mary's face when after finishing her phone calls, she realizes that neither her dear soul mate Jeff, nor any of her cherished, loving friends even offered to stop by with a lousy can of soup.
As Mary weakens, Toby gains the ability to hold her ePhone like a normal person.
Toby doesn’t even think about bringing Mary some chicken soup. I know she can’t manage opening a can and turning on the stove, but she could call Door Dash and have it delivered. But she’s concentrating so hard at trying to draw a cat—or something like that.
Mary is sobbing! The world will end for sure now.
Why does Toby have a little, tiny easel and very large brushes and pens?
The annoyed-looking cat staring out of Toby's easel reminds me of those "Can you draw this cat?" come ons pushing drawing lessons that I used to see as a child on the back of Highlights magazines. Apparently Toby will be too busy rendering her version of the cat to bother seeing to Mary's needs. Worse, I imagine the rest of the week a grapevine of Charterstoneites talking to one another by phone as they arrange a surprise dinner at Mary's, brought together with a bout of Covid for all.... Oh, yeah, there is no Covid in the Worthiverse...
The annoyed-looking cat glaring from the easel in front of Toby reminds me of those "Can You Draw this Cat?" ads I used to see as a child on the back cover of Highlights magazines. And why is Toby wearing an apron? Is she contemplating (Yikes!) rendering the puss in watercolor?! And will we be treated to several days of Charterstoneites talking to one another on the phone about what to d about Thanksgiving now that Mary has canceled? My world has definitely been rocked now that I know that comic strip characters can come down with illnesses that affect humans...
It’s hard to see Dawn so brokenhearted over the cancelled Thanksgiving dinner, isn’t it? Now she’ll have to go with someone her own age to see a movie they’ve been looking forward to for years.
Dawn's friend looks likes she stepped out of "Archie."
Mary's 0 for 2 in her search for friends who are (1) despondent over missing her Thanksgiving dinner and (2) concerned enough to order a Happy Meal to be delivered to Mary.
I wonder if Dr. Jeff will blow off Mary? Wouldn't it make sense to call him first? Oh, never mind, it's the worthyverse. I foresee a surprise dinner in Mary's honor.
Margret Hamilton makes a cameo appearance. Apologies, couldn’t resist.
If that’s supposed to be a poster for “Wicked”, congrats to June for being right on top of the popular culture. Oh, and Cynthia Ervio’s lawyer would like a word…
New flash! Dawn has a friend.
Or maybe she's babysitting?
Miss Scarlett
Undoubtedly, Mary's dear friends will show up with a rotisserie chicken, a bag of frozen Tater tots and a can of green beans. Mary will be thrilled despite the fact that they've caught her wearing the same nightgown she's had on for a week and hasn't yet had the strength to hose down the bathroom. Will she remember to ask them where the heck they were when she needed a can of chicken soup?
KitKat: I thought Dawn’s friend was one of the Jackson Twins! Do you remember them?
Ummm, Jeff…aren’t you a doctor, or something like that? So get your stethoscope and a mask, and maybe a covid test swab, and get over to Mary’s, Let’s make sure it’s not something serious, like RSV.
meg, I had to climb into the Wayback Machine to reacquaint myself with the Jackson Twins, but their faces and hair styles rang a loud bell. Maybe KM or June remembers them too. BTW, my sister, who was 9 1/2 years older than me, had identical twin friends named Joyce and Joan. They were brunettes like the Jacksons, but wore short, pixie-type do's.
Jeff (wearing his orange plaid lumberjack jacket, so manly) was going to visit Mary on Thanksgiving Eve? Was he going to chop celery for the stuffing? Design the nut cups? Color the place mats? He's giving Mary the bum's rush just like Toby and Dawn did. I bet Dawn forgot to relay the news to Wilbur, and he'll be pounding on her door tomorrow expecting dinner.
Oh, just look at old Dr. Hale N. Hearty, speed walking... somewhere? Please tell me that his location isn't the forest behind Charterstone and that it's not Wilbur's bathrobe he's wearing.
As @fauxprof said; isn't Jeff a doctor or something? Is this payback for all of Mary's withholding of (ahem) favors? Looks like he is as genetically unable to hold a phone properly, just as everyone else in this strip. Hmm...maybe Mary doesn't want him 'practicing' medicine on her. After all, he might put that stethoscope near an area completely off limits.
Miss Scarlett and KitKat: O, ye of little faith in the witty mindset of June Brigham! It’s a Thanksgiving Miracle, but I was just browsing some rare books, and one of them was a first edition of The Joy of Cooking, and it was not blue and white, but more of a peachy yellow. Mary is cooking from a rare old book, could be very valuable if signed by Irma S. Rombauer. “To my friend Mary Worth, who can’t cook for nothin’. Maybe this book will help.”
On the other hand, my several blue and white volumes are tattered, food-stained, and pretty much worthless. Now I’m off to make Fruit Punch for 50 People, and Simmered Porcupine with Turnip Greens. No boring old turkey for MY guests…
(And I hope Dr. Jeff is manning the ER after he finishes marching in the annual Plaid-wearing Parents without Partners Parade.)
Thankful for Karen, June, and all of you here without whom I would no place to write this. But, especially thankful for what I read here.
In celebration, here’s three exclamation points!!!
(Ok, I had some leftover, as they’re my least favorite punctuation.)
Ah, just as we expected, Mary's friends remembered her. The only itty bitty issue is those containers have been sitting in the 80-degree hallway for a couple of hours, and improper food handling may compromise the meal. Oh well, it's the thought that counts!
Happy Thanksgiving to my Worthiverse friends, and to Wanders, who started things and continues to provide us with this Mary Worth Snark Forum! I'm grateful for your support as I navigated troubled waters earlier this year. You people are not only witty writers, you are the souls of kindness! Now, on to Dr. Corey's pumpkin soup - just watch out for those slippery seeds and stringy membranes.
I’m thankful for so many things, certainly including you friends. I look forward to checking in every day and to the smiles that I know your comments will bring. I wish all of you well as we continue forward.
Happy Thanksgiving one and all. Enjoy the day with family and friends. Keep up the delightful snark. Perhaps some day Wanders will check in on us.
Happy Thanksgiving Day, one and all! I'm grateful for all the fun we share here every day. Have a wonderful day! -- Scottie
Happy Thanksgiving! I’m grateful for this warm and snarky community.
I am so very grateful for all of you MW translators. I've had a terrible year, but your comments and interpretations have lifted me up every day. Happy Thanksgiving to all.
Hope everyone had an enjoyable Thanksgiving Day. As an older person with no close relatives, you folks have started to feel like family to me. I am very grateful to Wanders for having started this blog and maintaining it for so many years, and for all of you who never fail to put a smile on my face every day.
Reading yesterday's comments was a wonderful way to start my day! You Worthiverse Worthies are the best! BTW meg, how was the simmered porcupine with turnip greens? Mary may want your recipe for Christmas dinner.
AND, here's recovering Mary in her purple jammies, sitting on a purple afghan and leaning against purple pillows. Let's have a show of hands: who else detests that hackneyed phrase "with all the fixings/fixins'"? Boo hiss.
Mary looks more satisfied with that sandwich than she ever does with Jeff, to put it mildly. Now we know what really floats her boat. Hey Mary, you might choke by chomping on that sandwich in a semi-reclining position. Does Mr. Alora know the Heimlich Maneuver?
Why, KitKat, thank you for asking! The simmered porcupine was deliciously tender, the meat just fell off the quills. And my husband and I are still trying to finish the fruit punch for 50- our 48 guests failed to show, so we drink a few cups, pass out, sober up, drink a few more cups…you know how it is when your guests disappoint you. And we put the remaining pounds of porcupine in the meat locker at the Piggly Wiggly so they could distribute it to the needy… charity is my middle name!
BTW, if anyone wants to know what Wanders is doing since he (sob) abandoned us, you might want to check out the Santa Royale Library.
@meg, you are firing on all cylinders today! I had to pick myself up off the floor to get to my keyboard. You and your husband could have used Toby's assistance with that punch.
Correction to my earlier post: Upon further examination, I should have said "pillow," not "pillows." There's one purple pillow and one purple lamp base, with a shade that looks like a UFO from a 1950s sci-fi movie.
Not sure @KitKat, but Mary's 'chips' are looking kinda purple too.
So yesterday, Mary was enthusiastically eating a pilgrim sandwich, and today she’s going to call to thank people, but…ominously…not until after she’s eaten. Oh, how I fear we’re about to have a story in which Mary becomes an obsessive Eater, and PUTS ON WEIGHT, and then we’ll have to endure her struggles as she attends Waist Watchers with Wilbur, and Ian, and Saul…OMG, could that be any more boring?
OK, Mary, drop the sandwich and take the carving knife. You look fine, don’t worry about your weight….
A drumstick (that can't be from a turkey!), slices of Spam, and a loaf of bread? Perhaps Mary isn't planning on eating this herself but will instead visit all her dear friends who pitched in for the Dahlia's takeout. "Here Toby, make a sandwich, and give the leg to Ian!"
Dahlia’s specializes in leftovers. No one has ever had an original meal there, or for takeout. Just leftovers. Everyone loves the cold leftover pizza breakfast, fresh from the fridge.
A four-dove Saturday. Perhaps they are fleeing because they noticed Mary was eating a bird.
That's a suspiciously empty pot on Mary's counter top. I wonder if in her fevered delirium she ate her own plant.
Nah, she didn’t eat it- she smoked it!
Worthiverse friends, you are all in top form! Hahahahaha etc.!
It's an historic day: the first Zoom Victory Lap and Mary Praise Palooza. I was wrong -- Mary apparently did eat all that food yesterday, and now she's working her way through an entire pie. Those two bags from Dahlia's sure held a lot.
Doesn't Mary know it's impolite to eat while speaking, and in front of other people? Tsk tsk.
I'm curious. Has anyone figured out what @meg suggested with her comment regarding Wanders and the Santa Royale Library?
Time for a Godfather moment wherein Mary gives her gang the what for, for having never returned her hospitality.
“ Wilbur, I went to listen to your karaoke, and I sat you at my table and fed you mayonnaise many times. And yet you never even offered me a bite of your Woody’s. barbecue.
“Jeff, Jeff…You ferried me on your rusting old USS Caine of a cabin cruiser…and you always took me to the same place for the Bum Boat’s dry, none-too-fresh salmon…would it have killed you to take me to Le Chien D’Amour and dine by candlelight, (which is very flattering to a woman of a certain [i.e. my] age.)? You can afford it- you make a nice living.
“And, Toby, why did you bring the store-brand orange juice and expect me to provide top shelf vodka for our day drinking fun? Ian, you never once invited me to your house for a cup of Auld Adjunct Academic, even though your wife is the only friend of your only neighbor.
“But let’s be frank here…you never wanted my muffins, and you feared sitting on my couch.”
Well meg, you continue to be on fire! I'm picturing KM as the dull, platitude-spouting muse to Mary and you as the impish pixie commenting satirically on the boring proceedings. And, inquiring minds just have to know: please expand on your remark about Wanders and the Santa Royale Library. I even Googled (ahem, researched) that. I did find the Wanderer's Library, which looks cool, but it doesn't seem connected to our Wanders or Santa Royale. Does Santa Royale even have a library?
On to the new plot: Mary has dodged another medical bullet, and Wilbur is still annoying survivors of disasters. Who knew? He hasn't mentioned "I'm Alive!" nor visited any site despite numerous possibilities over the past several years. He's still Wendy, too -- humpf!
Mary taking over Wilbur’s advice column should be fun. Except it won’t be.
It make senses asking a person to give advice whose whole life seems focused on giving people advice. However, without a muffin and the couch to eat it upon, will the advice given in the column ever be taken? Or will Mary’s advice be mocked on social media and go viral leading to a crisis of confidence in Mary. A blog could even start: AskWendyAndMe,com.
Wilbur, you must have a backup log of a few weeks to use while you are gone.
The way Wilbur is holding that muffin looks like he is going to mash into Mary's face if she says, "No".
And the solution to the missing Wanders and the Santa Royale Library is….
on my Maryworthandme.blogspot.com page. I use an iPad, with the Safari browser, and when I go to that page, the comments are on the left side. On the right side is, among other things, the Jukebox, the How to become a citizen
or rather, denizen of Santa Royale. Then there is The Santa Royale Public Library / What Wanders has been Reading part. It caught my eye the other day when the cover of a book (Ghost Army) I had been reading appeared there. When I looked more closely, I realized that it was actually a neatly detailed list of Wanders’ reading interests. And he has very good, wholesome taste. The End
Leave it to meg to point out something unobservant me never noticed, the Santa Royale Library/Wanders's reading list. Thanks so much, meg! It's a wonderful thing to still be connected to Wanders! (I noted "The Things They Carried' by Tim O'Brien on the list. I can vouch for the excellence of that book.)
I can't believe that Wilbur needs R & R. What he really needs is less time with Mary and her muffins and more constructive things to do
@KitKat -- Exactly! What in the world does Wilbur need R&R for? Does he ever do anything but sit around?
Actually, I think I just answered my own question. If he gets off the couch, travels to Florida, and has to go out and visit people, he'll be exhausted after two days, let alone two weeks. -- Scottie
Thinking about Wanders and looking at his reading list made me yearn for the Worthy Awards. Gosh, I miss those.
Yes, Wilbur, enjoy Mexico. We will enjoy you being gone. Don’t bother to send pictures, especially if you pack the Speedo. And don’t worry. Mary will take care of your advice column, while Dawn will take care of your surviving fish. I’m sure the fish funeral will be quiet and dignified.
MissScarlet, I treasured the Worthy Awards too. Your comment prompted me to go the MW & Me archives (huzzah to Wanders for their accessibility!) and revisit past WA, which are still a scream. I was trying to find the year that Mr. [somebody], a sort of Russian easy-listening lounge-type singer, had the opening number. Some of you veterans out there must remember -- meg, fauxprof, Louise F.? I His surname may have started with a B. That was hilarious.
Today: For some reason, the Plain Dealer's Comics section has Mary Worth in black and white, while everything else is in color as usual. ??? Perhaps this is a commentary on the feet of snow some regions of Northeast Ohio are coping with (not my area, thank goodness). Mary and Wilbur look like they time-traveled to 1952. A month or two (or seven or eight) in Cancun? Will this be a sequel to Wilbur's escapade with Fabiana in Colombia, or will he disappear and leave Mary with Ask Wendy indefinitely?
Oh, KitKat - How could you forget Mr. Trololo? I can't remember which year he entertained us at the Worthy Awards, but he was always my favorite!
Wilbur has a tough decision to make. Will he eat the muffin like an apple or an ice cream cone?
Hurrah and thanks, hmmm! Mr. Trololo was indeed the best!
Dawn's mature for her age? She's been in college for 15 years and hasn't even declared a major yet, Wilbur.
Mary, when you end every sentence with an exclamation point, it loses the impact. To be fair, if you removed all the exclamation points from your dialogue today, you would sound like some badly-crafted surveillance bot. And you wouldn’t want anyone to think that.
Dawn is mature for her age? I can remember when Dawn made her debut as a pudgy, bespectacled teenager, dumped on Wilbur by his estranged wife. I can’t pinpoint a year, but I know it was before I got married. So let’s estimate she’s 16 in, say, 1989. So that makes her, what? Early fifties? But, then, the Worthiverse exists in its own timeline, inaccessible even with Doctor Who’s Tardis.
Tiny fork!:
Hey! Mind your own @#$&%+# business!
It’s my strip, and I’ll exclaim if I want to!
Capisce?
Mary @#$&%# Worth!
Oh, I get it now. Wilbur doesn't really want to eat that muffin. He's just going to toss it and handle it for a while so it looks like he's gonna eat it.
Thanks, everyone for keeping this up while my family was trapped in Niagara Falls on the east side of the Big Lake Effect Snow Dump over Lake Erie last week. I do have to hand it to KM for at least creating an unexpected holiday strip for Contagious Mary and her friends. I DO notice that none of them cooked for her, instead opting for the truly personal option of ordering out. And, Tiny Fork, I thought of you with the Sunday strip that showed Mary eating a Tiny Bit of Pie from a Tiny Fork. Well rendered! As for Wilbur, I predict he will travel to Mexico, be kidnapped by a cartel that then realizes he is more trouble than he's worth so they dump him at the US border, sans passport. He then spends several months in a refugee camp trying to convince ICE that he is a US citizen. Good times! Finally, I notice people referring to KitKat's comments, but none show up for me on this blog. Do you all have a different log in? I would love to see KitKat's take on these endlessly entertaining stories. Keep warm, everyone, even if you aren't being plagued today with 50mph wind gusts off Lake Erie. Brrrr.....
LouisF,
Welcome back. Glad you survived the snow.
Regarding Wilbur saying Dawn is mature for her age, I have a hypothesis. Wilbur is comparing Dawn's level of maturity to his, and due to his lack of maturity as evidenced by his disregard for others, his lack of understanding when he is being a jerk, and overall personality, he sees Dawn as a much more mature person. He must think Mary is God-like.
Eating Mary's leaden muffins is the bulk of Wilbur's "heavy research."
Gee willikers, I'm mystified about LouiseF. not seeing my comments. Do the Worthiverse tech wizards have an idea of a possible cause? I'd like to tell Louise that her scenario for Wilbur's escapade in Mexico brought to mind O. Henry's short story "The Ransom of Red Chief," in which two lowlifes kidnap the son of a wealthy man and demand a ransom. The boy turns out to be a rapscallion who terrorizes the kidnappers, and they are more than happy to abandon their scheme.
@meg, Mary, I spoke in haste! Low blood sugar or something‽
Mary Worth is the kindest, bravest, warmest, most wonderful human being I've ever known in my life.
The saga of the uneaten muffin continues. I wonder if Mary will deign to comment (e.g.: Are you gonna eat that or what?).
Does anyone know of any advice columns that run only 1 day a week? Carolyn Hax, Dear Abby, Ask Eric, Miss Manners - they are all every day, or 6 days a week. How on earth does Wilbur support himself and Dawn?
Ah, MissScarlet, no one in the Worthiverse has any financial concerns! Most noteworthy is Mary herself, who apparently is still living off the resources the late Dear Jack left to her almost one hundred years ago, despite losing everything in the Great Crash of 1929. Jeff must've made a bundle in his medical practice (he has that ridiculous yacht, for one thing, and is "semi-retired"). Toby dabbles in her artwork and taught one class at the University of Santa Royale Community College; Ian must be very well paid as a tenured professor at the USRCC. Wilbur's "Survivor Stories" and "Ask Wendy" take little time but apparently pay very well. Which reminds me, he hasn't offered to pay Mary for filling in as Wendy while he gallivants in Mexico.
I hate it when Mary steals our snark!
Well put, Miss Scarlet. Mary is never convincing when she's trying to be cool and amusing. She's going to have to do a lot of holiday baking to make up for the muffin deficit that occurred in her Thanksgiving absence...
"Take care of yourself, Dawnie! See you sometime! Remember to take out the trash and recyclables!"
In honor of our own Tiny fork, Mary's wielding a tiny fork for her salad. She should be finished eating it by Wednesday.
Dawnie! Blech!
Here's Dawnie, on her way home from sixth grade and wearing a circa 1979 turtleneck sweater.
@KitKat: yes! It matches her rucksack.
Catching up:
@LouiseF "And, Tiny Fork, I thought of you with the Sunday strip that showed Mary eating a Tiny Bit of Pie from a Tiny Fork."
Yes, it's nice to make an appearance, although Tiny Stemware seems more favored. But I'm over it, so no worries.
@meg I had an actual low-blood sugar attack today, and it reminded me of your passing on Mary's (hilarious!) comments about my punctuation intolerance. In my answer, because I didn't make it clear as could be, I hope you did not think I was replying to you: I was replying to Mary, and the "low blood sugar" was referring to my own, not Mary's (or yours.) In Mary's case, of course, what flows through her arteries is nothing _but_ sugar.
No @#$&*%&ing problem, Tee Eff!
Wilbur returns home unexpectedly and finds Dawn eating steamed seaweed. He loses it. "A VEGAN???!!! NOT UNDER MY ROOF, YOUNG LADY!!! YOU CAN TAKE YOUR SMELLY GREEN GUNK AND GET OUT!!!" -- Scottie
“That’s fine, Dawn, dear. Just bring your own food with you. I can provide vegan water to drink. See you tonight.”
I call foul! Being vegan requires initiative, dedication, adherence to restrictions, self awareness and the ability to successfully balance nutritional needs. Dawn? 'Nuff said.
Today's invisible third panel is Mary looking stunned and thinking "son of a @&*@%!"
Plus, Dawn just started her vegan diet today? Who does that and then goes to
eat at someone's house who is likely using the 1933 version of the Betty Crocker cookbook?! I anticipate days of truly tedious monologues by Dawn trumpeting the virtues of the vegan diet...
Displaying her maturity, Dawn's first question is "What are we having tonight, Mary?"
Mary will smile while not revealing that the mushroom stroganoff contains regular sour cream and the orange tofu stir fry was made with butter. Take that, you spoiled brat.
Stroganoff usually requires sour cream, but there’s probably a vegan substitute. I get the feeling that KM googled “vegan recipes” and picked a couple at random.
With any luck, Dawn's new boyfriend will turn out to be the lying, burger eating, ski cap wearing former boyfriend of Sonja from the Keith Hilland story. Unlikely, as that would be sort of amusing.
In any case, as a vegetarian, I am mildly interested in how badly KM will "butcher" this vegan scenario.
Yes, @ fauxprof, there is such a thing as vegan sour cream. Unfortunately, Mary made a wrong turn with the orange tofu. It looks kinda brown/grey.
Oh good.. Dawn is so accustomed to Mary advising her, I'm guessing we will have Mary providing the virtues of the vegan diet, chief among them get yourself a vegan adviser...
Why is the brown rice green?
"Speaking of which..." of course it's delicious. It can't help but be anything else, now can it, Dawn dear.
Ummm…I think the brown rice has gone moldy.
Wonder what the secret ingredients in Mary’s Vegan Muffins might be?
When I read this morning's strip, I thought Mary said "open bar," not "open ear." I bet Toby could oblige Dawn with an open bar anytime, especially since Dawn maintains she's "an independent kind of girl." That's a laugh and a half!
meg, because of the appearance of Mary's muffins, I've assumed the secret ingredient is asphalt. Maybe asphalt is vegan.
Some kind of problem with Mary's continuity here. Yesterday ended with her saying "Speaking of which" regarding her cooking followed today by a comment about Wilbur traveling. Judging by the amount of "brown rice" in that big bowl, maybe Mary is figuring on having Dawn over for leftovers until Wilbur gets back.
"I recently broke up with Billy. I told him when we were at the malt shop."
Billy? Who is Billy? It doesn’t matter, just another one of Dawn’s never seen boyfriends. Actually, the most memorable of Dawn’s exes, although never seen, was Dave. Anyone here who remembers the greatest panel ever, “Reminds me of Dave” will probably recall laughing yourself into hysteria.
Indeed fauxprof! While looking at Michelangelo's David. Best statement of all!
Mary is a living example of taking it slow. She's over 100 years old and still putting of Jeff with both hands.
Righto, fauxprof! That is an unbeatable Mary Worth classic line!
As usual Mary doesn't ask any questions like "Why did you think it would lead to something more?" Instead she offers "Don't rush love", advice that nobody asked for and that may not even apply. I, too, long for the days of "Reminds me of Dave..."
You nailed it, LouiseF. Mary seldom (never?) listens to other people. Today, Dawn's remark about Wilbur, which is fairly insightful, especially for Dawn, is batted away by Mary. Stand by for a torrent of platitudes and squishy blah-blah from Mary/Wendy. She'll be sitting by her weird computer tomorrow.
Yes, Mary is here for you, Dawn. Whether you like it or not.
Yes, Dawn, tell me everything about your life. I need to hear. I have no life of my own and I must feed off of yours. (cackling, and eyes glowing).
Sheesh, how many times is Mary going to remind Dawn that she's welcome to come to her place? She never tells that to Jeff, nor does she hug HIM.
Oh come on, Dawn doesn't talk to her father. Well, if she talks to him it's a lot like talking to a wall.
Hanging out with Jared and his girlfriend, hmm? Gee, that sounds...so...terribly awkward in so many ways. KM must be in the throes of crippling writer's block to dredge up Jared and What's Her Name, who should be seeing a ton of red flags waving in front of her.
Dawn's still trimmimg her hair with nail scissors.
Dawn: What are your plans, Cathy?
Cathy: We're going skiing in the mountains. Last year, we tried skiing in the Mojave Desert, but it really wasn't all that much fun.
He invited her to hang out with him and his girlfriend???!!! WHO DOES THIS???
And here we are, friends, embarking on another trip to the Moylight Zone. -- Scottie
No matter what I do, I can’t add a comment, except, perhaps, for this one.
@Scottie: I so agree, and I love "Moyzone".
I'm glad to see that "Joy" is on sale during this holiday season in Santa Royale...
Thank you, Scottie, for coining "Moyzone." This word speaks volumes and is destined for regular use on MW & Me, e.g., "That's the Moyzone for you!"
Cathy's as "mature" as Dawn is. Holy moly.
Dawn should buy those turquoise boots for Mary. I bet Mary had a similar pair when she was in her prime in 1887.
Dawn: "Having Jared as a friend is better than being strangers with him."
Huh? I understand the part about having someone as a friend. But can you have someone as a stranger?
Good heavens! Someone unlocked the safe that has the brightly colored ink. How festive! And on that note, I will now ruin things with my annual carol:
Dr. Jeff sings, to the tune of Sleigh Ride
Just hear those foghorns sounding
And waves are pounding here, too
Come on, it’s lovely weather
For a boat ride together with you
Outside the wind is rising
It’s not surprising to view
But still, it’s lovely weather
For a boat ride together with you
There’s a happy feeling
Nothing in the world can buy
When at last we reach the Bum Boat
And we didn’t die
The salmon and the surf and turf
And maybe they’ll have pie
Keep doing the same old thing
And never wonder why
Just hear those small craft warnings
And winter stormings come through
Time for a lame proposal
And curt disposal by you
The same old course before us,
A boozy chorus or two
But still, it’s lovely weather
For a boat ride together with you
Thanks, KitKat, but credit for "Moyzone" goes to the inimitable Miss Scarlett, who took my idea and made it better. If only Moy herself could make this dreck better. -- Scottie
fauxprof, you have outdone yourself with this year's Christmas carol! I was singing along with Jeff and picturing his over-the-top yacht, with Mary arm-wrestling him for control of the wheel. Brava, brava!
What's the deal with the shoes? I have never bought shoes for someone for Christmas. Slipper? Yes. Socks? Yes. Perhaps it is inviting people to dress up for the holidays. I'm sure things are hoppin' in good ol' Santa Royale.
Hooray, fauxprof!! I'm feeling more festive just humming along to your version of "Sleigh Ride". And those shoes?! Darn ugly.... No wonder they're on sale. The fact that Dawn and her friend are even looking at them says plenty about their taste, almost as much as Dawn's talking about "hanging out" with her ex as if that isn't going to lead to some (not that intriguing) drama...
Fauxprof, you made me literally laugh out loud!
"Time for a lame proposal and curt disposal by you." Ha haaa, brilliant! -- Scottie
fauxprof - Excellent job! You've outdone yourself again this year. I laughed all the way through!
Testing…
You're coming through, meg. Keep at it!
fauxprof, if KM introduces a character named Curt Disposal, we'll know she reads this blog. He could be Dawn's new romantic interest. She needs a lot of help, and less cliches, in getting back on the horse, keeping her options open, and peeling her eyes (ouch). How hanging around with her ex and his current girlfriend fits into that plan is a mystery to me.
Is the pink couple in p. 1 two bumbling extraterrestrials? The one on the left calls to mind Wilbur, except he/it has too much hair.
Help!
Who is Cathy telling to get back on the horse? She doesn't seem to be looking at Dawn. Is it a coincidence that 'Dawn' rhymes with 'yawn'? I'll leave it to our lyricist, faux prof, to decide.
Meg, you are posting, but apparently you aren't able to see your posts. Is that right? Blink once for yes and twice for no. We need you back. -- Scottie
Agh, meg is stuck in the Moyzone! A couple of weeks ago, LouiseF. wrote that she was unable to see my posts; LouiseF., please comment if you can see this. (Maybe the weight of all the comments is affecting the blog.)
A "friendship break"? Is this a Dawn Yawn original? It's dopey enough to be one.
Dawn’s friend looks like the young version of Estelle, right down to the hairstyle—only brown, not purplish-gray.
Yes, "friendship break" is ridiculous! No one says that (except Dawn). I love "Yawn Dawn". I think a 'friendship break' only exists in the Moyzone.
Mary-Worth Ke-knowitall, only you can save me now!
"Blink once if you can see this; blink twice if you can't." Thank you, Scottie - THAT was hilarious. I've been giggling all day.
Handsome Bowling Guy looks about 40. Ordinarily, a crush by a 20-year-old college student would be problematic, but we know that Dawn is at least 37.
June has a thing for beefy arms on men. Remember Keith Hillend's huge biceps and massive hands?
@fauxprof, your remark about Cathy looking like a young versionof Estelle was spot on. Same hairstyle, same face.
Look, one of the Pink People is bowling!
Dawn has a one track mind and it's not on a bowling alley. Wonder if Beefy-guy and Jared will hit it off.
Dirk. Rhymes with "jerk."
A prediction: Dawn will initially find this big lunkhead attractive; then she’ll see Jared again and realize that his witty and earnest personality is really the type she’s attracted to. Then we’ll get the catfight we’re all craving.
Dawn thinks she picked Dirk up? (OMG—Dirk? She was better off with Dork—er, Jared.). Anyway, it looks like the beginning of love-bombing to me, but Dawn wouldn’t recognize a red flag if someone dropped it on her head.
Would someone please send KM an Urban Dictionary? No person of Dawn's (presumed) age (or anyone else under the age of 92) would think "amazing physique." Possibly: peng, fleek, rlgm, hot, smokin', jack, dime piece; there are dozens of other ways to describe Eye Candy. But "amazing physique"? No. Comprehend, KM, comprehend.
And I’ve never heard anyone under the age of 60 say “looker”.
Dawn is a tramp in training.
Dawn thinks she 'picked up' Dirk. But what really happened is that she signed up for bowling lessons. $50 and hour.
I love all your pithy and snarktacular comments, Worthiverse friends.
Dirk Tandy, not to be confused with Tirk Dandy, the Beau Brummel of Santa Royale.
Look, the female pink creature is running all the way up the lane, with her pink bowling ball! Thanks, June!
Dawn thinks she got lucky. What she got by handing her phone over to a complete stranger was scammed. It took Handy Tandy less than 30 seconds to get access to not only every piece of her personal information that she ever emailed, texted, or messaged, but also that of everyone on her contact list.
The funny part is when Dirk realizes he's hacked into the only person on the planet with no assets, no contacts, and no life.
So Mr. Hot is taking Dawn out on Christmas Day? I wonder if Wilbur has gotten himself into trouble as fast as his "mature for her age" daughter has.
Whoever's coloring the strip has fallen in love with the pink crayons.
Best Christmas Eve wishes to my Worthiverse friends.
Wonder what sort of vegan delight Daw's new love interest has in store for her. And dinner on Christmas? No matter what monochromatic outfit she pulls out of that closet, she is headed for a reckoning with Robo Bowler...
Taking her out on Christmas Day? Where? Church? His grandmother’s house? A Chinese restaurant? She just met this guy, and Dirk Tandy is a phony name if ever I heard one.
Is he a serial killer? A recruiter for a dangerous cult? An insurance salesman? When you consider your answer, please remember that this is the place that interesting plot possibilities come to die. Or is he just an off duty Hot Santa?
Enjoy your holidays!
A date on Christmas Day? How shallow of Dawn to go out with this hunk, rather than eat with the Charterstone crew.
Finally, something somewhat interesting to ponder. On every Mary Worth Christmas day panel that I can remember, I've seen Mary about to place a 56-lb. turkey on her dining room table surrounded by Dr Jeff, Toby and Ian, Wilbur and Dawn. With Wilbur away and Dawn, now seen seated on the greasy, red pleather seats of the bowling alley (btw, owned by Dirk) slurping Chinese take-out, whose heads will June photoshop onto Dawn's and Wilbur's bodies? My guess is Saul and Eve. Both have a shape similar to Wilbur's but neither has the perkiness of Dawn's... um... nose.
I wonder if Dawn is excited about becoming a pink person? She’s obviously got the wardrobe all set.
I’m betting that Looker Dirk is not vegan. And that will end that for Dawn.
MissScarlet
Merry Christmas everyone. Looks like Mary cut back to a forty-five pound turkey. You have to wonder how pitiful Dirk and Dawn are that they have no friends or family to see.
Dirk: Looker. Mary: Cooker. Saul: Stinker. Ian: Drinker. Eve: Please leave. Toby: Actually Victoria. Dr. Jeff: Self- abnegating.
Thunderheels - My thoughts exactly. Who goes on a first date on Christmas Day?! But apparently, family and friend relationships make as much sense as anything else in the Worthiverse. Why doesn't Mary invite Dr Drew, Dr Jeff's bachelor son to dinner? Or better yet, why doesn't Dr Jeff go to his daughter Adrian's home to have dinner with his grandchildren? BTW - I'm still annoyed that KM used the male spelling of Adrian instead of the female; Adrienne. Hope she never introduces a character named Francis / Frances.
Anyway, hope everyone had a lovely Holiday!
Happy Boxing Day, everyone!
Before we forget about yesterday's "Mary Christmas!" (haha, KM made a third-rate play on words), did we all notice something momentous? Eve was pictured NOT WEARING A NECKERCHIEF. What a stunning development!
Today: Dirk reveals himself to be a Jerk and Dawn abandons her veganism in record time, and on Christmas Day. Who could've seen that happening, other than everyone in the world? Perhaps June positioning the server's posterior so prominently in panel 1 is her commentary.
"But I'm a vegan."
"No you're not."
"I'm not?"
"No, you are not. Am I clear?"
"I just love a man who takes charge!"
Ai yi yi.
So for their big Christmas Day date, he takes her to a crummy diner?
And who orders a roast beef platter on Christmas Day?
Oh well, at least he wore his best brown tee shirt for the occasion.
Another baffling trip through the Moyzone. -- Scottie
Wow! Controlling, right out of the box. Will we have a red flag every day, and two on Sundays?
Dawn can sure pick em!
Called it! Said everyone in unison.
MissScarlet
KitKat - YES! The absence of Eve's ever-present neckerchief was the second thing I noticed. Max must be dead. But the first thing I noticed was that apparently the colorist was shocked at Toby's plunging decolletage and decided to color purple, the area of her chest beneath her pendant.
Getting back to Wednesday and Mary's annual Grand Presentation of the Overstuffed Christmas Turkey: Jeez, just look at her face! It appears that she has inhaled way too much of the gaseous leakage from this bloated PriceCo double-discount Thanksgiving bird, and she's higher than the moon. -- Scottie
BTW, red wine with poultry? Trés gauche. As word of this got back to Mary's more successful twin sister Martha Stewart, M.S. upchucked all over her Holiday Berry Meringue Wreath. -- Scottie
Scottie, I am glad to see you are keeping up with the latest Martha Stewart Holiday Recommendations, the better to judge Mary's dinner presentation. I also love the dangers you point out regarding her double-discount turkey, the possibilities of which augur a more interesting plot than the one transpiring between Dawn and RoboBowler. Guessing Dawn skipped the Christmas turkey at Mary's for vegan reasons but now is cast into a roast beef hell... Serves her right.
Well, Dawn certainly got over her "vegan" thing pretty quick.
Scottie, you are at the top of your game! Another head-scratcher: Were those whole pears encircling that turkey? The platter was full, so how was the turkey carved without overflowing the platter.
On to Dirk n' Dawn: A part-time used-car salesman? (Bellride Automall doesn't sound like an Audi dealership.) Only in the Moyzone would a 22-year-old man in the 21st century say, "I'll use my public relations skills in the corporate arena...." And, Dawn is a major-less junior! Only nine more years until she becomes a senior.
Good call on that lethal turkey, Scottie. It's probably been sitting out on her kitchen counter since she got home from PriceCo, three days before Thanksgiving.
I was surprised to see that UCSB does offer a major in automotive engineering (aka UCSR), although not "automotive business". I don't think you can get into any kinds of business "arena" these days without a graduate degree. Dirk may be stuck in the auto parts store for quite a while. Perhaps he'll be able to use his 'corporate skills' on the auto store customers. I'm sure they will be thrilled.
Dirk stares meaningfully into Dawn’s eyes, holding her hand tightly. Dawn blushes and thinks, he’s going to propose.
“Dawn, I’d like to….put you in a brand new Oldsmobuick tomorrow! Whattaya say?”
"One day I'll use my public relations skills in the corporate arena, just as soon as I learn to talk like a normal person. Until then, I'm pushing beaters at Shifty's Used Car Emporium."
"Dirk, did you just hear what you said?"
"Of course not. I'm a himbo."
" 'Pushing beaters.' You just spoke like a real human!"
"I did? Do you really mean that?"
"Yes, YES! You are a real boy!"
And then Dirkbod grabbed his phone and gave the news to Gepetto.
-- Scottie
"Aw, don't feel guilty! I had the same thing, and I feel great! Now, baby, how's about you doing something to thank me?" [Dirk winks and leers at Dawnie].
Scottie, the Dirk n' Dawn plot has gotten your creative juices flowing!
Mary did not tell dawn to take her time. She told her that she hopes the relationship will turn out the way Dawn wants. Looks to me like it is heading straight for what Dawn wants.
Toby is beginning to look as old as someone who uses phrases like "kids these days"
Let's call this plot "Dawn Gets an STD for New Year's."
Oh no! After Dawn had been a vegan for three whole days, going back to roast beef has damaged her eye health! Nice work, Dirk the Jerk. -- Scottie
I guess if there was ever any question about to what demographic KM targets her stories, this ancient thinking about men not making passes at girls who wear glasses should eliminate any doubts.
Scottie, you beat me to it! Dirk the Jerk, indeed!
@hmmm; indeed, straight out of the Moyzone. I wonder if Dirk will prove to be the big jerk we all think he is so quickly. After making out in the car yesterday, he can tell Dawn today that he can't be seen with anyone who wears glasses, since they look smarter than he is.
None of us are surprised that Dirk's jerkiness continues. BTW, how many young guys today are wearing a suit and tie at a New Year's Eve party?
This may be the first and last time we see Dawn's cleavage.
Seriously, Dawn, if this "coming of age" (FINALLY) story ends up with Mary having to explain to you why this guy is bad news, then I think you were actually pretty lucky that the only thing your school friends made fun of was your looks.
And the red flags keep flying. First he moves too fast, then he’s controlling, now he’s belittling her. Dawn, there is a good podcast called “Something Was Wrong”. I suggest you binge all the seasons.
Somehow I don't think this cretin is focused on Dawn's glasses....
"You were bullied because of your looks?"
"Yes. My mother and Dad were cruel. But Mrs. Worth was the worst."
-- Scottie
March 10, 2025: Wilbur returns from Mexico and is greeted at his apartment door by Dawn and a man he's never seen before. An excited Dawn hugs Wilbur and exclaims, "Welcome home, Dad! This is Dirk - he moved in with me in January. And guess what? You're going to be a grandfather!"
June created Dirk by recycling Zak's head and giving it darker hair. -- Scottie
It is a little-known fact that Dawn is quite close to the Cameron family, particularly Ian, who is quite protective of his ‘honorary’ daughter. When Mary Worth informed Ian of how Dirk was mistreating Dawn, Ian snarled, “I’ll run my dirk through yon young Dirk!”
Looks like Dawn and Dirk spent New Year's Eve with the Blue Man Group
Some people call themselves 'nerds' and mean it in a positive, brainy way. Dirt may think he is actually complementing Dawn...of course he doesn't know her very well. Wait till he finds out she's been working on her college degree for 15 years and she still doesn't have a major.
Excellent observation, Scottie. Dirk reminded me of someone, but I couldn't put my finger on who. Thank you!
I was startled by that blue keyhole on Dawn's neck until I realized it's her earring.
Mary-As-Wendy has unleashed the platitude machine - coveryour eyes! We need to see some of Wilbur's answers to compare them with her meaningless drivel. Also, does she have her laptop Velcroed to her blankie?
As Dirt and Dawn share a puckerless lip press, Mary sends thousands to the phone for the 988 suicide hot line.
@MissScarlett -- Ha haaaa, "puckerless lip press"! That is wonderful! I knew there was something weirdly unnatural about June's depiction, but I couldn't find the right words. You nailed it! Well done! -- Scottie
I can't help noticing that Dawn's "date" is entering its third day...Guessing Mary's contribution to Ask Wendy is a made up answer to a question Mary imagines Dawn asking. I doubt Mary has any real mail to answer, just keeping in meddle practice.
"You have good taste in music, Nerdgirl - you agree with me. Hah hah hah [snort]!"
Dawn is as shallow as a single raindrop.
Yes, Kit Kat! Wonderful! A single rain drop. Unfortunately, I am now cringing and beginning to pity Dawn. We all know where this is going.
I hope that Dirk is just a crass bro-dude, and not a serial killer, because either way Dawn is too stupid to save.
It must still be New Year's Day in the Worthiverse since these two are wearing the same clothes, and Dirk Head is still trying with the "Nerdgirl" comment....Trying indeed.
I hate to say it…but in the second panel, Dawn looks just like Wilbur.
Welcome to Day 5 of New Year's Eve/the early hours of New Year's Day in the Moyzone. This might gntil Groundhog Day.
meg, Dawn looks just like Wilbur in today's panel 2 also. I guess those specs weren't just an excuse for Jerky Dirk to belittle her.
Whoops, meg, I didn't notice that you had posted in the wee hours of January 4. Huzzah to you and your eagle eye.
I can understand wanting to dance. But hitting the floor is just silly.
So Dawn does bear some resemblance to Wilbur. But in all fairness, she's not fat and she does have more than 9 hairs.
As to Dawn looking like Wilbur, when she was first introduced—I’m guessing mid-1980s—she looked a lot like Wilbur. Full head of hair, but pudgy, with those same glasses. She was supposed to be about 16 and quite obnoxious, as I remember.
Dawn demonstrates a great capacity to ignore alarm bells, red flags, and flashing red lights. Meanwhile, Mary uses the line she gave Jeff when she nixed his New Year's Eve invitation in "Ask Wendy." That's life in the Moyzone.
I don't know guys, about Dirk's resemblance to Zak. Since Zak always sported a chin stubble, I'm not sure if he had a cleft chin. I'm getting more of a Tom Brady vibe. Anyway, don't worry about the Nerdgirl name, Dawn. If it turns out that Dirk sticks around for a while, it won't be long before he's calling you "Dear". Personally, I'd prefer Nerdgirl.
Eek! He does look like Brady! He seems to be very good at throwing passes, too.
Of course Mary can stay home on NYE all snug in her bed. She's complete and perfect all by herself. She is called, however, to help the less fortunate 'Ask Wendy' writers. So selfless. So admirable. So Moyzone.
"A great time tonight"? Is it still New Year's Eve in the Moyzone? Note that Dawn and Mary have the same bedside lamp. Maybe that's a Charterstone requirement.
Hmm, does Dawn's frown indicate that she's a mite perturbed with Mr. Gorgeous and his disregard for her wishes? (BTW, why is she wearing her glasses in bed?)
As New Year’s Eve carries over into Twelfth Night, it may be occurring to Dawn that Dirk is a bully.
@faxprof, that's finally dawning on Dawn?
Pretty soon Dirt is going to have to admit that he doesn't remember her name.
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